Leadership Thought: Don't Laugh at Being an MVP!

Dear Friends,

I read an encouraging quote this morning on being ordinary. It said, "We meet no ordinary people in our lives. If you give them a chance, everyone has something amazing to offer." Wow!  That means as ordinary as I am, I have something extraordinary to offer God, and so do you.

Did you ever feel ordinary? You are not exceptional in any particular area. You don't have any unusual gifts or talents or abilities and mediocrity seems to be the measure of your existence. If so, you are in good company. Most all of us have felt like this, or still do, and yet it has always been the case that God uses ordinary people like you and me to do extraordinary things for the Kingdom.

John the Baptist never performed a miracle, but Jesus said of him, "Among those born of women there is no one greater." (Luke 7:28) His mission was simply to be a "witness to the light." (John 1:8), and that may be your mission and mine as well. All John wanted to do was be a voice and a light that would cause others to think about Jesus. What greater mission could anyone have than that?

Epaphroditus was a giant of a man, but few outside of the ranks of Bible teachers could immediately identify his significance. He brought a gift from the Philippians to Paul while in prison, and then he stayed to assist him and to help bring him comfort and encouragement. In doing just this, Epaphroditus nearly died in carrying out his mission. (Philippians 2:30)
How many of us know the name of the person who was used to convert Billy Graham, or the one who entered a shoe store one day and led Dwight L. Moody to Christ? Do you know who taught Martin Luther theology or who discipled George Mueller and snatched him from the pit of hell, or who inspired the great hymn writer Charles Wesley to compose great church hymns? For the most part these unknown witnesses remain anonymous to us, but you better believe that God knows their names.

Think of the ordinary people that God has used throughout history. He used a slave named Joseph to save his family, a shepherd named Moses to lead Israel out of bondage into the Promise land, a farmer named Gideon to deliver Israel from Midian, and a shepherd boy to be Israel's greatest king...I think you get the point. God can use anyone, no matter how ordinary they appear to be.

God is not primarily concerned about bigness, greatness, or all-time records.  His giants are ordinary people who do their best at whatever He has called them to do because they love Christ. You are God's MVP (Most Valuable Person), and if you don't accept that honor, then you have totally missed the point of this message.

God is looking for ordinary people who He can use to do extraordinary work. You and I are ordinary, so we qualify to be God's MVP's (Most Valuable Persons) so let's get busy and allow Him to use our ordinary gifts and talents to do extraordinary things for the Kingdom. And don't be surprised at what He might do through you.

May you enjoy a Terrific Tuesday, and yes, be prepared to experience how God is going to use your ordinary gifts in some extraordinary way to serve Him today.

Yours in ministry,
Tom

Leadership Thought: Which Wolf Will You Feed-Faith or Fear?

Dear Friends,

The other day Jean and I visited a friend who had recently been diagnosed with cancer. The news was a shock for her, and she was concerned about how she would address the fear that comes when one faces a life-threatening situation. As we talked, I thought of a simple story I heard several years ago.

It’s an old Cherokee tale of two wolves. One evening an old Cherokee Indian told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside all people. He said, “My son, “There is a battle going on inside us between two wolves. One wolf is faith, and the other wolf is fear.”

The grandchild thought about his words for a moment and asked, “Which wolf wins?” The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

In this simple but profound little tale, there is a wonderful lesson. Each of us has choices in life, and the choices we make, make us. They will shape our experience, for good or for bad.

One can face life’s challenges with faith or fear and the choice is left to us. The wolves of fear and faith are constantly fighting to control our mind and our thoughts and the one that prevails will be the one which we feed. Feed fear and you will be fearful. Choose faith and you will be hopeful.

Faith and fear cannot exist together. Faith is described in Hebrews 11:1 one as “Being certain of what we do not see.” It is an absolute belief that God is constantly working behind the scenes in every area of our lives, even when there is no tangible evidence to support that fact. On the other hand, fear, simply stated, is unbelief or weak belief. 

As the “wolf” of unbelief gains the upper hand in our thoughts, fear takes hold of our emotions. But if we feed the wolf of faith, we find hope and encouragement begins controlling our life.

We need to understand that faith is not something that we can produce ourselves, for faith is a gift produced in our lives by the Holy Spirit. The Christian’s faith is revealed as a confident assurance that the God who loves us, who knows our fears, and who cares about our deepest needs, will continue to provide and protect as we face whatever situation might confront us.

Our faith will continue to grow as we feed the ‘wolf of faith’ and learn of God’s many faith-filled promises as seen in the Bible. The more we learn about God’s faithfulness in trials (Read all of Hebrews 11), the more we will see Him working in our lives and the stronger our faith will become.

My closing comments to the person we were visiting were to "Stay in God’s word and memorize it- “hide it in your heart”- and after returning home I sent her the following 10 verses to help feed her “wolf of faith.”

Hebrews 11:1-40, Joshua 1:9, Psalm 23:4, 2 Timothy 1:7, Isaiah 41:10, I Peter 5:7, Psalm 91:1-10, Philippians 4:19, Matthew 6:34-35, Psalm 56:3.

Yours in faith,

Tom

 

Leadership Thought: Do You Think it’s the Light That's 'Attractin Em'?

Dear Friends,

In the backwoods of 'Gooberland,'’ a Goober’s wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery.

Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said: “Here, you hold this high so I can see what I’m doing.”

Soon a baby boy was brought into the world.

“Whoa there,” said the doctor. “Don’t be in a rush to put the lantern down I think there’s yet another one to come.”

Sure enough, within minutes, he had delivered a baby girl.

“No, no, don’t be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern. It seems there’s yet another one in there!” cried the doctor.

The Goober scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor, “Do you think it’s the light that’s ’attractin em?’”

Light does attract a lot of attention. Jesus taught us that we are to be lights. He said, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do men light a lamp, and put it under a bushel, but on the lampstand; and it gives light to all who are in the house” (Matt. 5:14-16).

This dark world, filled with discouragement, depression, disease and death needs a lot of light, and Jesus says you are just the ones I need to shine your lights and brighten up the darkness.

If you are a Christian family living in a non-Christian neighborhood you are the light in that neighborhood. If you are a nurse on the floor of a Pandemic ICU unit, or an athlete on a team, or a student in your school, or an employee in a company, or a policeman in a car or a fireman in your station, you are a light, so hold your light high and let it shine. No, not so people will see and praise you, but so that they will praise the One who is the source of your light.  Brothers and sisters, don’t worry about how bright and sparkling you are, just shine the best you can, and Jesus will be seen and glorified.

In the words of that song every one of us have sung, “This little light of mine, I’m going let it shine.”

And if you do, like that goober, you will discover that maybe it is the light that is ‘attractin em.'

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

 

Leadership Thought: Who are Your Thanksgiving Giving Trees?

One of my favorite books is Shel Silverstein’s, The Giving Tree. Written is a 1964 this children’s book is about a tree who happily gives what she can to a young boy.  First, she gives him shade.  Then apples.  She even lets him carve initials into her.

As the boy grows up, he needs more. So, he takes her branches and eventually cuts down her trunk.  At that point, the tree is alive, but nothing but a stump.  Yet the boy, now an old man, still needs more.  He needs a seat.  She gives it to him.  “And the tree was happy.” (The last line of the book.)

I have read the book many times over the years, and each of those times I’m impressed with this wonderful story of such self-sacrificing love. When I think of the story, I often take a few moments to reflect on those many people throughout my lifetime who have been my “Giving Trees.”

My mind goes back to my high school days and my high school football coaches Frank Shields and Chuck Woodell as well as my high school pastor, Jack Smiley. These three men were very influential in my life, teaching me discipline, determination, self-confidence, and faith. I am so indebted to them and to the many others in my life who have loved and encouraged me.

Yesterday as I was lying in bed, I took some time to recall the names of others who have touched my life throughout the years. The names came flooding through my mind as I remembered their impact and influence. I thought of Chuck Beale a college football teammate who “badgered” me to attend a Fellowship of Christian Athletes conference back in 1962. Always persistent in his encouragement to attend the conference, I finally said yes, and it was there at the FCA conference in Lake Geneva, Wisc. that I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. How grateful I am that Chuck cared enough about me enough to continually encourage me to attend what turned out to be the “conference of my life.”

And then I thought of Clarence and Elizabeth Hoff who were in their early 70’s and who were committed to helping us build an integrated church in the city of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania during the early 70’s.

At an age when most people were thinking of enjoying retirement, they traveled a distance from a white suburban community, to join with me and others in our church’s efforts to minister to a community that had quickly gone from all white to 85 percent black in just five years. Joining with those remaining white members who had not fled to white suburban communities, they helped us build one of the few truly integrated churches in the entire city of Philadelphia. There at Cedar Park Presbyterian Church white and black worshiped and served together in what was for me and my family one of the most exciting times of our ministry.

They were among the first members of our Evangelism Explosion outreach that went forth witnessing to our community team, and God used them to lead many in our area to a saving relationship with Jesus Christ.

And when I needed a church office because my office was in my home, (a small area off our kitchen) and we now had three little children in our family, I enjoyed little privacy for counseling and other church related ministry. Despite my efforts to convince our leadership I needed an office in the church, the response was always the same- “there is no room for an office and your three predecessors never had a church office,” but my three predecessors were all much older and didn’t have small children running all over the house.

Realizing my situation, and at the time not even a member of the church, Clarence Hoff, took it upon himself to show up one day with tools in hand, (he had previously been a contractor), and to my surprise began building an office. There was no approval from the elders. Clarence didn't work like that. He saw a need, got tired of seeing that need go unmet, and with saw and hammer in hand and in three days he crafted a new office.

You can only imagine the looks on those surprised elders as they walked in on Sunday morning to discover that their pastor had a new and beautiful church office. What could they do? Some of those elders who are still alive relish in telling that story again and again.

Clarence may well have saved my family and my ministry with his selfless act of love. With no expectation to be paid a single penny for what he did, he simply built an office out of love.

Countless are the examples I could offer of those wonderful people like the Hoffs whose love and commitment have shaped my ministry and blessed my life and the lives of our family.  Like that “Giving Tree,” they had only one purpose in life: to simply serve others because of the One who loved them and gave Himself for them.

Who are the “Giving Trees” in your life?  Maybe it's time to crawl up in some warm and cozy place this Thanksgiving Day and take a few minutes to reflect and give thanks for those “Giving Trees” who have left a mark on that life because they loved you in a special way. Their names could probably fill a page. I know mine would.

Thank you, Lord, for gifting me with such wonderful friends. I am a thankful man, and I trust that today each of you are too. May the Lord help each of us keep this little story in mind and may the story challenge us this an everyday to be a “Giving Tree” to all those who cross our path.

Happy Thanksgiving my friends and keep writing. I love to hear from you.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

 

 

Leadership Change: Are You Ready for This Kind of Change in the Church?

Dear Friends,

Someone said the only one that likes changing is a wet baby. The person was probably right. Change is not always a popular experience, and it can produce a lot of damage if it is not done wisely, carefully, and lovingly.

Change is never trivial no matter how small that change may be. I remember the first time I ditched my robe in a church I served. You can’t imagine the uproar it caused in those pews. “What is Tom doing walking around the pulpit teaching without wearing a robe?” It was as if I had ascended the pulpit in my birthday suit. I can write and laugh about it today, but I can tell you I wasn’t quite prepared for the reaction I received. That experience was a stark reminder to me of the ‘tumult’ that change can produce, no matter how small that change may be.

Today we face major changes in the church. A friend of mine who is a church consultant suggests the last time the church faced this kind of change was the Protestant Reformation, over 500 years ago.

The Pandemic has forced church change in ways most of us could never have imagined. Whoever thought that 20-40 percent of church members would suddenly be sitting at home on Sundays watching their church services over the internet. And many of those sitting on sofas and worshipping from the comfort of their living rooms, may choose never to return to the sanctuary. We may not like these changes, but they are most likely here to stay, and so we must find ways to adapt and adjust to those changes if we want to remain relevant.

I love to be in live services where I can sing, pray, and worship, and where I can hold and hug other brothers and sisters in Christ. But there are some brothers and sisters who may choose to never return to be held and hugged. As a result, the church must find ways to adapt and adjust to meet our changing culture. We should not see this as an unwanted compromise-giving in to culture- but doing something new and exciting to reach our culture. I don’t particularly like such change, and while it may be a hard and painful reality for me to accept, I know to ignore it could diminish our outreach to a sizeable segment of our population that needs to hear the gospel.

I don’t want to be among those echoing the famous seven last words of the church- “We never did it this way before” and lose an opportunity to reach those who might not grow up worshipping the way I do.

When people allow their own personal preferences to usurp the church’s efforts to reach people for Christ, the church is in danger of becoming irrelevant. When change happens in the church that I don’t like, I must always remind myself that the church is not here to serve me and my preferences or traditions. It is here to reach the world, and if that change can help in accomplishing that goal, I better be championing it no matter how I personally feel about it.

I am encouraged when I think of Isaiah’s words, “See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” (Isaiah 43:19).

In the end, I know the church is His Church, and I can stand on the promise that because it is, the Gates of Hell shall never prevail against it.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Did You Ever Throw Mud Against a Clean Wall? The Dangers of Gossip.

Dear Friends,

R.J. LeTourneau was the inventor of numerous kinds of heavy earth moving equipment. His company used to make a scraper known as the ‘Model G.’ One day a customer asked the salesman what the ‘G’ stood for? The salesman replied, “The ‘G’ stands for gossip, because like a talebearer, this machine moves a lot of dirt and moves it fast.” Winning with People, John Maxwell, p.52.

Proverbs 25: 18 reminds us that “telling lies about others is as harmful as hitting them with an axe, wounding them with a sword, or shooting them with a sharp arrow” (Living Bible Translation).

All of us need to be like the little girl who told her mom that she was a peacemaker in school. “What do you mean,” her mother asked? The little girl responded, “I knew something, and I didn't tell it.”

Each of us should be careful never to fertilize the grapevine with a wagging tongue. Guard it, control it, whip it into shape, if need be, but don't ever let it ever “move a lot of dirt and move it fast.”

“Lock your lips,” was the title of a “Daily Bread” devotional from years ago that I filed away. The devotional quoted, Proverbs 10:19, “When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.” The devotional went on to say that “Some Christians are like an old shoe- all worn out but the tongue!” How embarrassing to be numbered among those possessing a “worn out tongue.”

May our prayer always be, “Lord, guard my tongue from gossip, for it is like mud thrown against a clean wall. It may not stick, but I know it leaves a mark.”

Gossip, someone remarked, “Is like accepting stolen property; it makes you guilty of the crime.”

Lord, guard our lips this and every day from ever sharing stolen property.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

 

Leadership Thought: If You Are Going to Fail, and Fail You Will, Fail Forward.

Dear Friends,

Failure is not our enemy if we learn from it. Our attitude toward failure will determine the ultimate impact of that failure. If we learn from it, it will ultimately help us not to make the same mistake again. But if we ignore it, we run the risk of repeating the same mistake.

The other day I presided at a funeral. In preparation for it, I needed to type some Scripture verses I wanted to read. I have voice activation on my computer which enables me to speak directly into it which then will automatically type my spoken words. Anyone who has used this feature, knows that in doing this, you have to indicate when you want to add punctuation such as commas, periods, and quotation marks.

And so, when I came to read the Scripture during the funeral service, and fresh off dictation, I audibly included the word “comma” in my reading of the first verse, and then to make matters even worse when I read the last words of verse 1 I involuntarily concluded it with the word “period.”

My performance was not only embarrassing to me, but it must have been baffling to those in the pews who were now scratching their heads wondering what was going on in the head of this pastor. To make matters worse, at the end of my reading of the verse, I remember audibly exclaiming for all to hear, “Where did that come from?”

I had become so programmed using my voice activation, speaking “comma,” “period,” and “quotation marks” that these words had unknowingly sneaked into my communication.

I am grateful my failure was small in comparison with the many far more significant failures I have made over a lifetime of ministry, (preaching a Stewardship sermon on Mother’s Day is right there near the top of the list). However, you can be sure of one thing: I will be careful to remind myself never again to carry my commas and periods into my ‘pulpit performance.’

Failure is never our enemy; it is our response to it that determines how we treat it. If we learn from it, we grow and become better because of it.

Years ago, John Maxwell wrote a wonderful book Failing Forward. The idea was that when we fail, we can learn from our mistakes and fail forward. We can be successful even in our failure when we make the necessary adjustments to succeed. We leverage our failure by learning from it. Failing creates character and provides us with the opportunity for growth.

I love what Winston Churchill once said about failure: “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”

So have a great day and remember if you are going to fail, and fail you will, be sure to “Fail Forward.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: The Art of Neighboring to the Neighbor Next Door.

Dear Friends,

A friend and I are teaching a course on evangelism in our church, and last Sunday we discussed the word “Frangelism.” I am not sure you will find “FRANgelism” in your dictionary for I am not sure it is a real word but only a descriptive expression to remind us of those to whom we are called to share our faith. We are called to share our faith with F (friends), R (relatives), (associates) and N (neighbors).

And it is the ‘N’ letter, “Neighbor” that I want you to remember in the parable of the Good Samaritan, we learn that our neighbor is any person, anywhere, who is in need.  But more than a metaphoric neighbor-let’s bring it closer to home and think of N as a specific neighbor, the one who lives next door or across the street. This neighbor is not some general unknown neighbor, but a real-life neighbor whom we see every day, walking their dog, or pulling into their driveway.

Do we know this neighbor? Rather than worrying about the unknown neighbor living far across the sea that we haven’t seen, let’s start at home by getting to know the neighbor we have seen.  Let’s try and get connected. Let’s begin to build a friendship with them and their family.

To help us do this, the authors of a wonderful little book, The Art of Neighboring, suggest we start by drawing a map of our immediate neighborhood. List the names of the two neighbors living to the right of you and the two neighbors to the left of you. Then list the four neighbors that live across the street from the two neighbors on either side of you. You now have your neighborhood map. Now list the names of these neighbors, first and last names, if possible, and any relevant information about them that might be important in helping you to connect with them-hobbies, common interests, employment, family etc.

This little exercise might be eye opening-at least it was to me. I didn’t know much about my neighbors whom I was supposed to love and to whom I was called to share my faith.

Maybe you are like me in this regard. I know the exercise has challenged me to be more intentional about building relational bridges with my neighbors. Hopefully building those relationships will lead to deeper and more personal conversations that one day will provide opportunities to share my faith with my “real life” neighbors.

Yours in faith,

Tom

Leadership Thought: The Three Kick Rule for Settling Disputes and Getting Revenge.

Dear Friends.

Revenge is never a wise response to a hurtful action. The story is told of a wise old Alabama farmer and a shrewd New York lawyer who got into an argument over the ownership of a duck the lawyer had just shot. The duck that fallen to the ground was on the side of a fence on the farmers property. When the lawyer went to retrieve it, the farmer claimed since it had fallen on his property, the duck belonged to him. A heated argument ensued. 

The lawyer threated the farmer reminding him that he was a high-priced lawyer from New York City and that he would sue him for everything he had if he didn’t give the duck to him.  The argument became more intense.

The farmer suggested a way of solving the dispute. He said in Alabama they had a three-kick rule to settle such legal disputes. The lawyer had never heard of the three-kick rule, so he asked the farmer about it. The farmer said, “Each side gets three kicks and after the three kicks the one who is still standing wins the dispute.” 

The young lawyer agreed thinking he could easily take this old famer who is now hobbling down from his tractor.

The farmer says, “I will go first,” and he proceeds to kick the lawyer in the groin as hard as he can. The lawyer is dazed, but he manages to get up from the ground. The farmer then kicks the lawyer a second time, this time in the kidneys. The lawyer winces in pain but again manages to get to his feet.  The third time the farmer delivers a kick to the lawyer’s face which breaks his nose. The lawyer struggles to his feet, but in spite of his pain he is reveling in the opportunity that it is now his turn to exact revenge on the old farmer for what he has just done.

The lawyer says, “I can’t wait to get even with you," and just as he gets ready for his first kick, the old farmer says. “That won’t be necessary. I quit. You win. The duck is yours" as he climbs back on his tractor.

It has been said that “Revenge is a monster-each act like a boomerang that comes back at the thrower,” and how true that is. The only way that one can break the cycle of revenge is through forgiveness, the kind that we see modeled on the cross by our Savior who reached out to those who had just put him there, and cries out, ““Forgive them for they don't know what they do.” That kind of forgiveness is never easy. But its alternative- not forgiving - will eat away our strength and ultimately destroy us.

Paul writes, “Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written ‘it is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord (Romans 12: 17- 19.). 

The Life Application Bible writes that these verses “summarize the real core of Christian living. If we love someone the way Christ loves us, we will be willing to forgive. If we have experienced God's grace, we will want to pass it on to others. And remember, grace is undeserved favor. By giving an enemy a drink, we are not excusing his misdeeds. We're recognizing him, forgiving him, and loving him in spite of his sins- just as Christ did in our case” (p. 1989).

Revenge doesn't accomplish anything. “If we allow our hatred for those who have wronged us to go unchecked, it will eventually destroy us. We will follow our bitterness all the way to hell” If Experience Is Such a Good Teacher Why Do I Keep Repeating the Course, J. Ellsworth Callus, 1994, P. 113.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. Remember, "He who seeks revenge, digs two graves." Chinese Proverb

Leadership Thought: Some Simple Thoughts on How to Be an Encourager.

Dear Friends

The Apostle Paul writes, “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing” (1 Thess. 5:11). How important it is for believers to be on the lookout for ways to encourage others.

The late great psychologist William James writes, “The deepest principle of human nature is the craving to be appreciated,” and pastor and author Chuck Swindoll states. “We live by encouragement and we die without it.”

I try to be on the lookout for ways to encourage people, because I know what a great feeling it is when others encourage me.

One of my favorite stories is the one in which a little boy asks his father to play darts with him. The father asks his son, “How do you want to play?” The little boy says, “Dad, it is very simple. I’ll throw the darts and you say wonderful.” Those words, 'wonderful', 'good job,' 'you are the greatest' are words that are hard to forget.

I don’t know who said it but it’s true: “Flatter me and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you, ignore me and I may never forgive you, but encourage me and I will never forget you.”

If you are not hardwired to be an encourager, let me suggest something that will encourage you to join the encouragement ‘gang.’ Take five pennies, if you can't find pennies anymore (nickels will do just fine) and place them in your right pocket as you begin your day. Every time you say or do something to encourage someone, regardless of how small that effort might be, take one of those coins out of your right pocket and place it in your left pocket. Hopefully, by the end of the day. your right pocket will be empty.

When you are engaged in a conversation with someone look for opportunities to encourage them. Put a 10 on their forehead to remind yourself that they are valuable, and then treat them with the greatest respect.

Often time I will close a conversation with a question, “Do you know what I like about you,” and then share with them a sincere compliment-no phony baloney. The emphasis is on sincere.

Remember encouragement is biodegradable and that’s why we need to give it so often. It has a short shelf life.

And one more thing I would suggest, and that is smile when you are talking. I have a friend who always talks with a smile on his face. His smile, whether talking or listening, is engaging and makes me feel like I am his best friend.

And in closing, let me suggest in conversing with someone, always seek to be impressed not impressive. Everyone likes to be with someone who makes them feel important.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. Mark Twain said, “A compliment can keep me going for a month.”

Leadership Thought Would You Rather Possess Grit or Giftedness?

Dear Friends,

The other day I listened to a podcast where the speaker used the word “grit” in describing a key quality of successful people. I thought to myself that is a great word. It’s a core strength of leaders, and it often determines whether you will fail or succeed in life.

Angela Duckworth, a leading expert on grit, says that “Grit is passion and sustained persistence applied toward long term achievement, with no particular concern for rewards or recognition along the way. It combines resilience, ambition and self-control in the pursuit of goals that take months, years and even decades.”

If you possess grit, you are the kind of person who has tenacity, and determination (nothing will keep you from achieving your goals). Grit will help you get up no matter how many times you get knocked down. Grit will overcome a lot of deficiencies in your life. You won’t always be the smartest and most gifted person in the world, but if you have grit, the chances are you will be successful for grittiness will almost always overcome giftedness.

You may possess exceptional talent, gifts and ability, but without grit, others less talented and with less ability will pass you by. I used to tell my son as he was growing up that “slow and steady wins the race." You may not be the first one out of the starting blocks, but life is not a sprint, but a marathon, and if you possess grit, you’ll eventually outdistance the seemingly more gifted in the race.

If you have grit, it means you will work a little harder, last a little longer, fight a little tougher, and in the end your grit will win over other’s giftedness. I would rather have a lot of grit with fewer gifts than a lot of gifts with little grit.

One has no farther to look than the Apostle Paul to find an example of one who possessed grit, and I believe it was this quality that made him the spiritual giant he was. He was steadfast, a great synonym for grit. He never quit or gave up. He never backed down no matter the challenge, and even when death stared him in the eye, death always blinked first. He writes to us, “My dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain” (1 Corinthians 15: 58).

In relating challenges believers would face in the last days when they would come face to face the dangers of spiritual compromise, he exhorts his disciples “To stand firm and you will gain life.

Call it determination, endurance, steadfastness, or grit, we need this quality in our professional and spiritual lives. Like the banking commercial says, “Don’t leave home without 

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. “Over time, grit is what separates fruitful lives from aimlessness.”  John Ortberg

Leadership Thought: Are You Ever Coming Back to the Church Building? (Thoughts on Online and In Person Worship)

Dear Friend

Will they ever come back? That is the question that church leaders across the country are asking. Will church members ever return to in service worship? If most church surveys are correct, the answer may be no.

57 % of those who are 55 and younger prefer online services to in person gatherings, and many of those church members will remain home on Sunday mornings rather than attend in person worship.

While statistics vary on how many church members will eventually return to in person worship, most analysis suggest as many as 20-40% will choose to remain at home and worship in the comfort of their own living rooms. Many churches are already investing more of their resources in developing and improving their online services in anticipation this change.

71 % of those over 55 prefer in person worship and many of them who chose to remain at home during the Pandemic, have now begun to trickle back. But the unanswered question is will those making up the Millennials and Gen X population ever return.

The quandary that many churches are facing in view of these numbers, is whether to close down online services as some churches have recently done, in an effort to promote in person gatherings.

A member of our church recently sent me the following message that she had seen on the internet.

“As online services become very convenient, it's important to remember why church attendance for you and your family matters so much.

You can't serve from your sofa. You can't have community of faith on your sofa. You can experience the power of a roomful of believers worshiping together on your sofa.

Christians aren't consumers. We are contributors. We don't watch. We engage. We give. We sacrifice. We encourage. We pray by laying hands on the hurting. We do life together. The church needs you. And you need the church.”

Now the bias of the writer is obvious, and some might argue with the writer’s premise. However, the Bible says, “Christ makes us one body individuals who are connected to each other.” (Romans 12:5) We experience a new connection when we become children of God- we begin to belong to each other as brothers and sisters.

Personally, I find it hard to imagine how this kind of connection can exist if we are never face to face with one another.

“The body we are talking about is "Christ body of chosen people. Each of us finds our meaning and function as a part of his body. But as a chopped- off finger or-cut off toe we wouldn't amount to much.” (Romans 12: 5 The Message Bible).”

If one of our fingers was chopped off, that finger would not only cease growing, it would cease living. Can we maintain the kind of closeness with one another without being physically connected?  How can we touch one another, hug one another, laugh and cry with one another through the computer screen?

While I recognize the value of online training programs, prayer groups, conferences and seminars, I find it difficult to imagine how the church can really function as the church without people being able to personally and physically connect with one another on Sunday mornings.

The California Department of Mental Health once did a study and discovered that if you isolate yourself from others and don't develop close friendships- like in a church or a small group- you are …

Three times more likely to die from an early death.

Four times more likely to suffer from emotional burnout.

Five times more likely to be clinically depressed.

Ten times more likely to be hospitalized for an emotional for mental disorder.

“You are members of God’s very own family….and you belong in God’s household with every other Christian” (Ephesians 2:19 The Living Bible)

We need each other, so if you are one of those who prefers to stay at home and worship, keep in mind there are brothers and sisters in the flock who need you, who long to see you, and who are never going to be the same without your presence.

Yours in Faith and friendship,

Tom 

Leadership Thought: The Worst Game You Will Ever Play Is the Blame Game.

Dear Friends,

As a former high school teacher and coach. I have always been indebted to the legendary basketball coach John Wooden who taught me a very valuable teaching principle: “You haven’t taught until they have learned.”

This principle was one of the cornerstones of Coach Wooden's life. He was careful never to criticize a player for something they did or failed to do. Instead, he would accept responsibility for his team or his players’ failures, believing it was his fault for not adequately teaching them what they should have done.                                

Coach Wooden believed that when you blame others you prevent yourself from being able to do proper self-evaluation, which is critical to self-improvement. The leader who doesn't blame others has his or her office in the solutions department, not the excuses department.

Everyone would love to play or work for a coach or a leader who lived out this philosophy.

King David once found himself the victim of the blame game. The Amalekite’s had made a raid on the town of Ziklag, and they had carried off the women and children and everyone else in the area. David's wives Ahinoam and Abigail were among those captured. His men were bitter over what had happened, and they began blaming David, even talking of stoning him.

David's men looked for the easy way out. Let's play the blame game and get rid of David. But David isn't into making excuses or finding a scapegoat. He doesn't point fingers or blame anyone for his army’s predicament. He finds his strength in the Lord for he possessed the wisdom to know that when you face a problem, it’s useless to look for someone else to blame. Instead, he focuses on the solution, and he knows the source of that solution is God.

And so, he turns to God for advice. He asks the priest Abiathar to bring the ephod, and then he asks the Lord what he should do. The Lord provides the answer. “Go after them.” He and his men do, and the result is one of Israel’s greatest victories. You can read about it in 1 Samuel, chapter 30.

I have a quote in my files, and I'm not sure of the source, but I think it is worth sharing.

         “Blame never affirms, it assaults.

          Blame never restores, it wounds.

          Blame never solves, it complicates.

          Blame never unites, it separates.

          Blame never smiles, it frowns.

          Blame never forgives, it rejects.

          Blame never forgets, it remembers.

          Blame never builds, it destroys.”

One of the most innovative psychologists in this half of the 20th century, said he considers only one kind of counselee relatively hopeless: that person who blames other people for his or her problems. “If you can own the ‘mess you are in,’ there is hope for you and help available. But as long as you blame others, you will be a victim for the rest of your life.”

I will never forget the wisdom of Don Shula, the legendary Miami Dolphin coach who reminds us, “When people are lame, they love to blame.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

I am Indebted to Clint Hurdles, Daily Encouragement, "Wooden's Wisdom" -Volume 2, Issue 67 for the information on Coach Wooden.

Leadership Thought: Whether You Are a “Big Gun” or a “Little Shot,” God Wants You to Share Your Faith.

Dear Friends,

If statistics are correct, only 5% of all Christians have ever experienced the joy of leading someone to Christ. And yet, as believers we are commanded to “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all creation” (Mark 16:15). Why is it that so few of those who follow Jesus fail to take seriously His command to share our faith.

Leighton Ford, who used to be on the staff of the Billy Graham association tells the story of how he was speaking at an open-air crusade in Halifax, Nova Scotia. Billy Graham was to speak the next night and had arrived a day early. Dr. Graham came incognito and sat on the grass at the rear of the crowd. Because he was wearing a hat and dark glasses, no one recognized him.

Directly in front of him sat an elderly gentleman who seemed to be listening intently to his presentation. Ford writes. "When I invited people to come forward as an open sign of commitment, Billy decided to do a little personal evangelism. He tapped the man sitting in front of him on the shoulder and asked, "Would you like to accept Christ? I'll be glad to walk down with you if you want to." 

The old man looked him up and down, thought it over for a moment, and then said, "Naw, I think I'll just wait until the big gun comes tomorrow night." Good News Is for Sharing, Leighton Ford, 1977, David C Cook publishing.

Unfortunately, there are many who think that only the 'big guns' can do evangelism, and so they avoid sharing their faith like the plague. "I'll bring someone to church so they can hear Pastor so and so, and he can evangelize them, but don't ask me to share my faith, for I wouldn't know where to begin."

Let me suggest a few things that might be of help to those of you who are not the 'big guns' but the 'little shots.'

Try to find common ground with the person with whom you are speaking. The Living Bible translates 1 Corinthians 9:22 like this:  "Whatever a person is like, I try to find common ground with him so that he will let me tell him about Christ and let Christ save him." 

Be natural. Normal conversation is fluid and respectful, and it allows for humor and invites response.

Be open and willing to admit your struggles and failures.

Be respectful, look at people for what they are as well as what they can become.

Be simple, communication increases as simplicity does. Don't let Christian jargon get in the way.

Don't forget what it was like to be a non- Christian.

The great preacher Charles Spurgeon once said, “That the reason some saints will have a greater fulness of heaven than others will be that they did more for heaven than others. By God's grace they were enabled to bring more souls there.”

If you are not presently sharing your faith because you don’t feel adequate, but you are willing to be trained, let me encourage you to go online to “Harvest.org.” Go to “resources” and then “online courses” and click on “Go and Tell.” The 5-session video course is taught by Greg Laurie, and it is one of the best evangelism training tools available.

And then do me a favor and let me know what you think of the course.

Whether you are a “Big Shot” or a “Little Shot” `God wants you to be sharing your faith.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: A Trip to Orlando, a Surprise Bowling Trophy and a Friend I Will Never Forget.

Dear Friends,

This past week Jean and I traveled to Orlando, Florida where I attended a church consultant conference on the future of the Post Pandemic Church. For the past year and a half, I have been privileged to be a part of a five-member team from around the country who have been training under church consultant Bob Whitesel.  Bob is a unique individual. He is a former pastor who earned two doctorates from Fuller Seminary, where he taught for over 20 years. He is the author of 14 books and is nationally recognized as one of the top three church consultants in the county. I have learned so much from this man who has not only been my church consultant mentor, but who has also become a dear friend.

Two members of our five-member training group were present for this Post Pandemic Church Conference led by Bob and following the conference we all went out for dinner and some bowling. Now I haven’t bowled in over 40 years, but somehow, I managed to break a 100 (quite an accomplishment for me) and believe it or not that was enough to win the friendly competition among consultants.

It may have been obvious by our conversations that we were all future church consultants, but certainly not bowling pros. At the end of the evening Dr. Whitesel surprised me by presenting me with a real bowling pin which he had purchased from the bowling alley and which all other team members personally signed.

When I got to the airport, I was told I could carry my bowling pin trophy in my carry-on bag. So, Jean and I checked in our one suitcase, and I kept the bowling pin in my carry-on bag. However, when we went through security, I was told they would not allow me to carry the bowling pin on the plane. I guess the thought of an 80-year-old man wielding a lethal bowling pin was considered just too great a risk. Now I certainly wasn’t ready to leave my autographed trophy bowling pin behind, for trophies like that are not a dime a dozen, but it seemed I had no other choice as the plane was boarding in ten minutes and my suitcase had already been checked in.

It was then that Eric Millan came to the rescue. Eric was a part of the airport security check in team, and he had been helping Jean and I navigate through the lengthy check in process. Eric wasn’t about to see us leave that bowling pin left behind, and so he took off running to the baggage area which was a lengthy distance away. I was doing my best to keep up with him, and when I finally did catch up with him, he asked me for my boarding pass in hopes he could rescue my suitcase. Unfortunately, I had left my boarding pass with Jean some five minutes away, and now the plane was boarding and there was no time to run back and get it. I watched Eric demonstrably negotiating with the baggage security official trying to retrieve my bag which amazingly he was able to do. We then raced back with the bag to the boarding area, where I once again had to go through the whole check in process which Eric wonderfully expedited.

I quickly stuffed my prize possession into an already bulging suitcase, and watched it loaded on the plane.

With no money in my pocket to give Eric and with Jean already having boarded, I thanked him for his kindness. I grabbed a pen and scribbled down his name and address on my boarding pass, and I told him how blessed I was to have met him. I assured him that I would write a note to the airport acknowledging his kindness to a “bowling pro” who was willing to do everything he could to preserve his bowling memento.

We arrived home safely with my trophy bowling pin in hand. It now sits proudly on my desk as the world’s largest paper weight.

I will never forget my gracious and caring friend Eric Millan who was so kind to a man he never met before. How I wish the world had more people like Eric. 

November 13 is World Kindness Day, and it’s coming up soon. Wouldn’t it be great if every day was World Kindness Day and each one of us would learn to speak the language of kindness that even the deaf can hear and the blind can see. Kindness, simply put, is demonstrating care and concern for others. It is the quality that binds people together and from my perspective we could use a little “binding” these days.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: A Remedy for Those Staying Home from Church Because of the Covid Pandemic.

Dear Friends,

Someone said, "Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives us something to do, but it doesn’t get us very far."

Worry is a thief of time. It robs us of opportunities to be doing productive activities that would benefit ourselves and others.

As I look out on our congregation on Sunday mornings, I see a number of empty chairs that once were filled by regular worshippers. I don’t know all of the reasons that some in our fellowship have not yet returned to those chairs, but I suspect that some of them are empty out of worry over the Covid virus.

I know one person who would take up one of those empty chairs if she could.  Ethel Halvorsen is in her mid-90’s, and she lives in a senior assistant living facility where they are careful to monitor outside travel.

A few months ago, I was blessed to talk with this wonderful woman of faith, and what she shared with me was something everyone needs to hear. We chatted about how she was doing, and then our conversation turned to the coronavirus. I wondered if she would respond like the many others, I have met who are so stressed out by this pandemic. This was not Ethel, however. Calm, unfazed by all that is going on in the outside world, she sits comfortably ensconced in her chair reading and studying her Bible. 

I asked her why she was not worried like much of the rest of the world, and she mentioned that she claimed Psalm 91:10. I remembered the 91st Psalm. One of my favorites, but for the life of me I couldn't recall verse 10. We both hurried for our bibles- a telephone Bible sword drill if you will- as we each sought to be the first to find and quote the verse. I won! I read “No evil shall befall you, nor shall any plague come near your dwelling.”  And then there is the wonderful follow up promise in verse 11: “For he shall give his angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways.” Talk about a couple of “Virus Verses.” For Ethel faith will always triumph over worry, and for us the antidote is the same. If those verses are not enough, you might wish to turn to Matthew 6:33-34 for another dose of spiritual fortification against worry’s onslaught.

Now I don't want to dismiss the need to be careful and vigilant as we deal with the pandemic which has worried so many, but I can't help thinking that the world would be a lot less stressed if we had more people like Ethel Halverson walking around.

Pastor and evangelist Greg Laurie put things in perspective for me with his 3-point outline on dealing with the Pandemic:

Be Practical and take precautions. Wash your hands with soap, keep your hands away from your face, and stay away from huge crowds.

Be Prayerful. Instead of using up your time getting more stressed as you sit in front of the television listening to dire predictions of what could be, use the time to pray. Pray for those who have the virus, pray for those working with those who have contracted the virus, pray for those who are stressed out by the virus. Pray, pray, pray and pray some more. While doing so be reminded of Philippians 4:6 -7. “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your request be made known to God, and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” 

And the final P, “Proclaim.,” Use this time as an opportunity to share your faith and the hope you have in Jesus. As believers we need not worry for we know that He is the one who has defeated sin and death.

God is bigger than the corona virus or any other fear that might seek to enslave you. And I would add a fourth P: “Don't Panic,” for panic is never productive. As, someone has written. “Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows; it empties today of its strength.”

So, turn off the television, grab the book, the Bible of course, just as Ethel does, open the word, and then pray away any worry or stress that may be stealing peace from your heart.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: The Kind of Candidate for Whom You Should Vote.

Dear Friends,

E.E, Cummings said, “The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.”

I love laughter, and in every church, I have pastored I have sought to encourage laughter at the staff level. The workplace should be a place of joy. Those serving should always be human enough to laugh at themselves.  Those who feel too important to laugh at themselves rob themselves, their family, and their friends of a great source of joy.

Laughter, levity, humor, joy, are qualities that are needed in today's workplace. They are vital ingredients in any aspect of work, but especially in the ministry. One man said, “I won't send a missionary to the field who doesn't have a sense of humor.” I suspect it was because he had learned that if a missionary doesn't have the ability to laugh, he or she could not survive in the challenging, and sometimes lonely environment of the mission field.

It is true that “A merry heart is still good medicine.” (Proverbs 17: 12). God wants us to have fun, to develop a sense of humor if we don't have one, and to laugh a little, for laughter is therapeutic.

I wish today’s politicians would learn to laugh a little more at themselves, acknowledge their mistakes and admit their failures and shortcomings. I think in acknowledging their vulnerability, they would make themselves far more appealing to the voter who knows they are not perfect, even when they themselves refuse to acknowledge it.

So don’t forget to go to the polls today and vote, and if you find a candidate who can laugh at him or herself and who admits to not having all the answers, you might want to pull their lever. At least you will know that you voted for someone who is honest, human, and who enjoys a good party.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

And yes, don’t forget that as C. S. Lewis said, “Joy is the serious business of heaven.”