Leadership Thought: What Would You Do If You Found $43,000 in a Couch You Had Purchased?

Dear Friend

I had breakfast last week with Dave Hinton, a friend who volunteers his time with Habitat for Humanity. He told me the following story.

A Michigan man made a shocking discovery inside a couch he purchased from a thrift store for just $35: an extra $43,000.

Howard Kirby purchased a couch from the Habitat for Humanity ReStore in Owosso only to discover it came with the wad of cash inside one of the cushions, the store manager told ABC News on Saturday.

Kirby decided to return the money to the couch's owner.

"He could use it. … He has needs, but he said he just felt this prompting from God that said, 'This isn't yours,'" store manager Rick Merling said.

Howard Kirby found $43,000 in a cushion of a couch he purchased from a thrift store in Owosso, Michigan.

Kirby met with the couch's original owners on Thursday to return the money. The store had called the family to say that Kirby found something "they're gonna want back."

"It was very, very shocking to them," Merling said.

The couch belonged to the grandfather of the family, who died about a year ago, according to Merling. The family called the thrift store to ask them to pick the couch up and left their contact information.

"I think they were hoping there might be some pictures. They would have never dreamed that it was money," he said.

While Merling said the store often hears from people who discover items left behind, Kirby, who could not be reached by ABC News, was the first to actually return something.

"He's happy that he's got a couch," Merling said.

"Someone said, 'Are you gonna give the cushion back?' And he said, 'No, that's a $43,000 cushion.'"

My friend personally told me 'the rest of the story.'

Habitat was so impressed with the man’s integrity that, when they discovered Merling’s need for a new roof, they quickly mobilized their volunteers to replace his leaking roof with a new one.

Abraham Lincoln was one of the greatest examples of integrity who ever lived. He wrote, “I desire so to conduct the affairs of this administration that if at the end, when I come to lay down the reins of power, I have lost every other friend on earth, I shall at least have one friend left, and that friend shall be down inside of me.”

“Real success does not compromise personal integrity. If you are not a success by God’s standards, you have not achieved true success.”  

These words from the Life Application Bible are commentary on Proverbs 11:3,5 where we read “The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity. The righteousness of the blameless makes a straight way for them, but the wicked are brought down by their own wickedness.”

Good words for us to remember in an era where people of integrity seem harder to find than a two-dollar bill. 

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thoughts: 4 Words Every Grieving Person Wants to Hear.

Dear Friends,

I was out to breakfast with two very special friends last week and after a few moments of conversation, one of them looked me in the eye and asked, “How are you doing?”

Those four words are so important for a grieving person to hear, as it gives that person permission to openly and honestly share his/her feelings of pain.

One professional counselor expresses it this way. “It is not your job to help someone stop grieving. Your job as a support person is not to cheer them up. It is to help them feel heard.” (Megan Devine, founder of Refuge in Grief)

Often friends of a grieving person will avoid addressing the painful subject of grief with them. They may be afraid to bring up the subject for such discussion makes them feel uncomfortable, so they carry on like nothing has happened.

Not knowing what to say or feeling uncomfortable in the presence of someone dealing with grief should never be an excuse for saying nothing at all.

Talking with one who is grieving may be difficult or awkward and yes, even at times uncomfortable. You may feel inadequate and fear saying the wrong thing, but ignoring or avoiding the subject is the worst action you can take with someone who is grieving.

Grieving people need to talk and be heard and the general question, “How are you feeling,” may seem trite and a bit impersonal,  it provides the grieving person the opportunity to share his or her feelings, something that is important for them to be able to do.

Sitting across the restaurant table from my friends, those words, “How are you doing?” communicated genuine love and concern and provided me permission to share my pain and sadness, something that is so important for a grieving person to do.

When talking with someone who is grieving, please don’t ignore the person’s feelings out of fear of saying the wrong thing. Say something, even if it might be the wrong thing, for the only thing that could be worse than saying the wrong thing is saying nothing at all.

Don’t ignore the feelings of the person you are with. Acknowledge that you know they may be fragile and encourage them to share the hurt in their heart. They will appreciate and be grateful for the opportunity to share their feelings with you.

You might want to ask the grieving person, “Is there something you need, or “can I do anything for you?”

Be specific in suggesting some possible ways you might be of help-making phone calls, picking up groceries, providing transportation as the grieving person may not know what he/she needs.

Be honest and acknowledge your feelings of inadequacy, but at the same time communicate your willingness to help learn how you can best be of assistance.

Embrace their feelings whether you agree with them or not. As someone shared with me, “feelings are neither good nor bad; they just are,” so don’t try to soothe or change them but embrace them even if you don’t agree with them.

Don’t worry about making things worse. Even if you don’t always get it right (there is no perfect script for communicating with those who are grieving) your efforts to love and support them will outweigh anything you might have wished you didn’t say.

And if you are afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing, admit it but assure them that despite any mistakes you may make, you can be counted on to love and support them through their journey of grief.

“Grief is not a problem to be solved; it’s an experience to be carried," (Megan Devine), and you can help the person carry his/her grief  by your care and concern.

In closing the most important ministry you can provide to one who is grieving is to be present with them as they go through their journey.

As I reflect back upon the last weeks of Jean’s life when she was under hospice care, and I was lying with her on a narrow hospital bed with a heart that was breaking, it was the silent witness of my closest friends who hour after hour sat with me in our bedroom and whose presence communicated what no words could ever do-“We love you and we are there for you.”

As I write these final words, the tears are falling as I am again reminded of how these dear friends helped ease my pain by their presence.

It is so true as Allison Krause sings that sometimes, “You say it best when you say nothing at all.”

Yours still grieving but still growing on the journey through grief,

Tom

Leadership Thought: What's It Like to Talk with a Friend You Haven't Seen for over 50Years?

Dear Friends,

It has been almost 50 years since I talked with her. She came to our church in Philadelphia as a college student studying at Earlham College, in Indiana. She was a member of Northwest Youth in Action, a community outreach ministry that our church had established in an effort to reach out to our racially changing neighborhood.

In 1970 when I came to the inner-city church in Philadelphia, God gave me a vision for reaching the community by serving the community. One of the ways we accomplished this was establishing a low cost five-week summer camp for children in grades 5-12. The camp grew from 100 children the first year to a camp with over 550 children, including a special needs camp for children with disabilities. The camp was named "Northwest Youth in Action," and was led by a staff of some seminary, college, and high school students, who together with a large number of volunteers from the church, were responsible for driving buses, teaching classes, coaching sports, leading worship, making lunches and above all loving on the children of that community. 

Our philosophy was to get the community into the church by getting the church into the community. The program expanded to include evangelistic evening lawn services, a basketball league and  a summer employment program where we helped connect area youth with summer employment.

Two days ago, I talked with Kathryn Joyner, one of those former staff members. It was the first time we had talked in almost 50 years. She is now retired and living with her adopted daughter in Richmond Indiana.

Being thrust into an inner city inter racial ministry was an eye-opening experience for her. Coming from a small rural town in Indiana, she had never been to a major city before, but she quickly adapted to urban ministry and became one of the most valuable members on our team.

It was such a blessing to reminisce on the phone as we discussed her two-year summer involvement and how that experience shaped and impacted her life and ministry.

Immediately after hanging up the phone following our 45-minute conversation, I was overcome with gratitude for the many relationships that were forged and fashioned during that inner city ministry.

There are few things that forge greater friendships than sharing in a common ministry,  and those friendships transcend both time and distance.

Yes, even though Kathryn and  hadn’t talked since the 70’s, our relationship was still intact, and the friendship we established during those two years she served with our church was as strong as it was the day she left to return home to college.

Friendships are not a luxury; they are a necessity, and the more friends you have, the happier we will be. This is especially true for pastors.

A number of years ago, the Lilly Endowment invested $ 84 million over 10 years to study what makes for excellence in ministry. One of their interesting discoveries was that “pastors need real, intimate, vulnerable friendships, if they are going to last in ministry; relationships with peers are the key factor to pastoral longevity” (Desiring God,” Pastors Need Friends Too, Feb. 10, 2018 taken from the Internet).

I can personally attest to the truth of these findings after serving 7 churches, some a second time. As the song says, "People, and yes pastors who need people, are the luckiest people in the world."

It has been said that "God has given us memories, so that we might smell the roses in December,” and how grateful I am for the many wonderful memories I have of friends I’ve gathered along my spiritual journey.

One of my favorite classic country songs is “Unfair Weather Friends” by Merle Haggard and Willie Nelson. It is one of the greatest friendship songs you will ever hear. If you go to U tube  you will hear the two of them singing these words:

“I might wind up stuck out on some old forgotten highway

Somehow, you’ll show up and sure enough be going’ my way

You’re always there, right where you’ve always been.

I don’t have to wonder where’ll you’ll be if I should need you

All I have to do is close my eyes and I can see you

Always there, right where you’ve always been

My come whatever, unfair weather friend.”

I know you probably have a lot of those “unfair weather friends” in your memory bank.

Why not take a moment to ask God to bring some of those friends to mind and grab the phone or grasp a pen and let them know how much you love them and how much they mean to you.

I promise that you will be glad you did, and so will those you contact because there is nothing like seeing the face or hearing the voice of one of those many “unfair weather friends.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: How to Stay Young When You're Getting Old. 

Dear Friends,

The famous ageless baseball pitcher Satchel Page once asked the following  thought-provoking question: "How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?"

We may be old when measured in years, but we can still be young when measured in spirit and attitude. 

I  wonder if our friend Joshua ever considered the idea of slowing down and retiring? We read "When Joshua was old and well advanced in years, the Lord said to him, you are very old and there are still very large areas of land to be taken over." (Joshua 13:1)

I thought to myself, but what about retirement? Hadn't Joshua done enough already? Why not simply coast through the rest of life and enjoy your grandchildren? But no, Joshua had things to do and places to go. He wasn't about to retire from doing Kingdom business.

And then just a chapter later we meet Joshua's buddy, Caleb, who said, “Today I'm 85 years old, and I'm still as strong as the day Moses sent me out; I'm just as vigorous to go out to battle now as I was then. Now give me this mountain” (Joshua 14:11). Good ‘ole’ Caleb knew there 'ain't no mountain high enough’ to deter him from his next climbing challenge.

At 85, Caleb is not ready to retire, but he's still looking for a challenging assignment. His cry was not “give me some easy place of retirement,” but rather, “give me this mountain.”

It is true as someone said that “Youth is not only a time of life, but also a state of mind.” As I move through my later years, I hope that I can remain as vigorous and as youthful as Joshua and Caleb were in their 80’s.

I hope that I can be as productive as George Bernard Shaw, who was 94 when one of his plays was first produced, or Benjamin Franklin who helped frame the constitution at the ripe old age of 82, or my church friend Richard Winters who's 93, and who became a believer in his late 70’s and is quickly making up for lost time when it comes to doing kingdom business.

We are never too young or too old to serve the Lord. Age has little to do with ability. Just remember that the next time you're tempted to use age as an excuse, for age has nothing to do with dreams and determination and vision.

Let me close with Chuck Swindoll’s “5 Tips for Staying Young.”

1.  “Your mind is not old, keep developing it.”

2.  “Your humor is not over, keep enjoying it.”

3.  “Your strength is not gone, keep using it.”

4.  “Your opportunities have not vanished, keep pursuing them.”

5.  “God is not dead, keep seeking him". 

(Taken from the Tale of the Tardy Oxcart, Charles Swindoll, p.27).

Good advice, hey?

Have a great day.

Your friend in the faith and still gazing at the next mountain.

Tom

P.S. Remember, "Life is like a roll of toilet paper, The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes."

Leadership Thought: What Would Your Church Look Like If Everyone Did This?

Dear Friends,

Yesterday before church I was talking to a member who every Sunday sits in the same area of our Family Worship Center. I suggested to him that he might want to try and sit somewhere else for a change as he might meet some new people.

 "I am a creature of habit," he responded. "I don't like to move around,  so I sit in the same general place each Sunday."

I knew him well enough to say to him, "Sometimes we need to break old habits," and I then suggested he might want to sit in a different area so he could connect with someone he didn't know and perhaps make a new friend." 

I am glad to say he responded and said, "I think you are right and maybe I will give it a try."

Now I don't know if he made any new friends on Sunday, but I do know that unless we come to church with the intention of making new friends, we will miss wonderful ministry opportunities.

Like LEGOs we were made to connect with others.

Americans today are less connected than at any other time I can remember. We are like marbles. We bump up against each other for a milli second and then we scatter.

The church doesn't need rabbit hole Christians who pop out of their hole on Sunday morning, come to church, and then as soon as the last hymn is sung, scurry back home to their hole where they can hide from others for the rest of the week. 

Because we don't make the time to engage with others on Sunday mornings, we and  others we are the less for it.

I remind our people that we were created for community and fashioned for fellowship. God wants us to be connectors.

Genesis 2:18 states "Then the Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.".

God didn't just create one human, but two.

The church is called a body and as a body we all have different parts and different roles so that together we can serve one another. 

The church is  a family and if one of the members of that family is hurting or in need, another part of that body should automatically respond.

Every Sunday I come to church with  a goal of meeting and making at least one new friend. 

If every member of your church would come with the same goal and commitment, just think of the difference it would make in your church. 

Relationships matter to God, and they must matter to us.

We don't have to be best friends with everyone, but we do need to know some people well, and for that to happen we must be intentional about building  relationships.

It doesn't matter if you’re an extrovert or an introvert. You need to be connected.

Salvation in the New Testament was never meant to be an individual experience.

There are many good reminders in the Bible about the importance of buildings relationships, but one of  the most memorable is found in  Ecclesiastes 3:9-12.

"Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed, but if one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. but how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple braided cord is not easily broken." Ecclesiastes 3:9-12)

As you prepare to worship next Sunday, I suggest you pray and ask the Lord to help you meet and make a new friend. 

"LEGOS  are wonderful toys but no LEGO can be any more than it is until it is put together with others." ("The LEGO Principle:5 Reasons for Connecting," from the internet, no author given)

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

 

Leadership Thought: Helpful Lessons I Am Learning on My Journey Through Grief.

Dear Friends,

Grief comes in waves and sometimes those Journey Through Grief waves hit you when you least expect it.

Although it has been over a month now since I lost my wife the pain and sadness is still there and those wave still keep on coming.

Just yesterday as I sat in the office of a woman who was helping me with my tax returns, something that Jean always had done, those waves enveloped me.

As the woman was finalizing my returns, I suddenly erupted in tears. The lady helping me was so sweet, but it was obvious she was unprepared for my outburst, and that she wasn’t quite sure what to do or say.

Grief is like that. You never know when it will come and what might trigger it.

As a friend told me who, like Jean, had lost her battle with Parkinson’s last November, “Grief will always be with you, but you somehow learn to manage it.”

I have gotten over apologizing for my emotional breakdowns and have come to accept them as a natural and normal part of the healing process.

If I can be thankful for anything going through my own grief, it is the fact that I am now able to more fully appreciate the toll grief  can take on the one who is grieving.

Grief can make those around you feel uncomfortable. And to those people who are not sure what to say or do, let me offer this advice.  Just listen. Listening can be the most effective ministry you can offer to the one who is grieving.

Stay in touch with the one who is grieving. You may not feel comfortable talking with such a person, and you may not know what to say, but that is OK. Just listen. Let the person who is grieving know you care and are thinking of them. Let them talk about their feelings. Encourage them to talk about their loved one and share memories of him/her.

I have been so grateful for the people who have stayed in touch with me and who periodically call to remind me they have not forgotten me. Knowing there are those who are thinking of you and praying for you has been so incredibly helpful to me.

I have a couple of friends who regularly call and check up on me. Our conversations may not last for more than a minute, but just knowing that someone cares about you is comforting and reassuring.

Just yesterday my daughter Rachel sent me an article that she found helpful, and I pass it along as it might better help you understand what the grieving person is going through.

“I wish I could say you get used to people dying. I never did. I don’t want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don’t want it to “not matter.”  I don’t want it to be something that just passes. My scars are a testament to the love, and the relationship that I had for and with that person. And if the scar is deep, so was the love. So be it. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are a testament that I can love deeply and be cut deeply,  or even gouged, and that I can heal and continue to live and continue to love. And the scar tissue is stronger than the original flesh ever was. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are only ugly to people who can’t see.

“As for grief, you’ll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you’re drowning with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it’s some physical thing. Maybe it’s a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it’s a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.”

“In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you will find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what’s going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee.  It can be just about anything… And the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.”

“Somewhere down the line, and it’s different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall, or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O’Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side.  Soaking wet, Sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you’ll come out.

“The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don’t really want them to. But you learn that you’ll survive them. And other waves will come. And you’ll survive them too. If you’re lucky, you’ll have lots of scars from lots of loves.  And lots of shipwrecks.” Eric Alper, taken from the internet.

And as you go through your grief, don’t ever forget, “That grief is itself a medicine.” William Cowper.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: How Approachable Are You?

Dear Friend,

When it comes to abilities, one of the greatest abilities a believer can possess is “approachability.” Christians need to be approachable. There was no one who ever lived who was more approachable than Jesus. People flocked to Him. Those on the fringes, the outcasts and the ‘undesirables,’ were attracted to Him. He was accessible, available, and when people met Him, they always found a friend who would welcome them and seek to meet their needs.

Unlike Charlie Brown who was famous for speaking those words, “I love mankind, it’s just people I can’t stand,” Jesus loved people, and it was this welcoming quality that caused people to flock to Him.

Are you and I approachable? Do people look forward to being in our presence? Are we open and friendly and good at making people feel welcome and comfortable when they are with us?

Approachable people possess the quality of humility. Being humble they recognize that they are not above anyone else.

They are non- judgmental. They don’t judge people; they simply love them just as Jesus did.

And finally, they are  kind. They make time for people and go out of their way to make them feel special. It is true as Christian Bovee writes that “Kindness is the language the deaf and hear and the blind can see,” and kind people should always be looking for opportunities to make life easier for others.

As you walk through life today, I encourage you to look for ways to make yourself approachable. Be on the lookout for opportunities to invite others into your life.

Jesus invited everyone to be His friend. He welcomed them into His life saying,  “Come unto Me, all you that labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).

Is there someone today who might find a special measure of rest because you took the time to be approachable?

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: An Umpire Who Seeks to Pay it Forward.

Dear Friends,

No one achieves success on their own. As the saying goes, “If you ever see a turtle on a fence post, you know they had help getting there.” Every successful person can always point to someone who has impacted and influenced their life and helped them get to where they presently are today.

I am a great believer in looking for ways to add value to other people, because I have had so many people add value to me.

I have been umpiring high school baseball for over 30 years, and I love working with new and aspiring umpires. I remember how much I was helped by those who mentored me during those early years when I was starting out, and now I have the opportunity to help others through our umpiring mentoring program that pairs up veteran umpires with those who are just beginning. It is my chance to ‘pay it forward’ by helping and encouraging others who are learning how to umpire.

In Acts 20:35 the Apostle Paul conveys the biblical principle that giving is better than receiving. That principle is still true today. Whether it has to do with the giving of our financial resources or the giving of our time or our abilities, we ourselves benefit by giving to others.

Every leader becomes better when they commit to sharing and helping others. Such an attitude is pleasing to God. Remember, the Lord “Loves a cheerful giver.” 2 Corinthians 9:6-7

Legendary basketball coach John Wooden often said, “Don’t tell me what you’re going to do- Show me.”

Today, let’s be on the lookout for ways we can add value to others, and then take action to follow through and do it. As you go through your day, maintain an outward focus while asking God to show you something you can do to benefit or encourage someone else. Write a letter, make a phone call, pay a visit, bake some cookies, bring some donuts to a meeting, buy someone’s lunch. The list is endless. It just takes some intentionality and a little effort.

And then at the end of the day, ask yourself one question: “Did I add value to someone today?”

Significance begins with you, but it is meant to be shared.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: The Day I Changed My Clothes in the Pulpit.

Dear Friends

When the railroads were first introduced to the US, some folks feared that they’d be the downfall of the nation! Here’s an excerpt from a letter to then President Jackson dated January 31, 1829.
As you may know, Mr. President, the railroad carriages are pulled at the enormous speed at 15 mph by engines, which, in addition to endangering life and limb of passengers, roar and snort their way through the countryside, setting fire to crops, scaring the livestock, and frightening women and children. The Almighty certainly never intended that people should travel at such breakneck speed. Martin, Van Buren, governor of New York.

Over 25 years ago as a young pastor, I learned that change is not always easy to accept. I remember the congregational uproar the first time I decided to jettison my robe for less formal attire. Some in the church were not ready for such a 'drastic' change. 

I laugh about it today as I know the church and the present  pastor, and I'm certain they would react in the same way should he decide to exchange his casual attire for that of a robe.

Change is never easy, and many people will fight and resist it, even if the change is rational and makes logical sense.

It is natural to become attached to tradition and hard for many to accept doing things differently. Change can cause discomfort, but discomfort is the price you pay for change. If change doesn't cause some discomfort, it is probably not change.

Some leaders take the approach that their people will get used to change, so let's just move on and not worry about how those who disagree with that change might feel. 

However, often their insensitivity to the way their people may feel and react to change may unfortunately cause them the loss of valuable members.

In leading change let me suggest some important things to keep in mind.

1. Never minimize the impact that even small change can have on people, especially those who have been a part of that church for a long time. What is a seemingly a small change to you, may be a momentous change to others.

2. In leading change it is wise to move from the 'stage' to the 'table'. One who leads from the stage may be effective in casting vision and making persuasive presentations. Everyone may listen and be impressed, but inwardly, no matter how persuasive the leader may be, there will be some who will undoubtedly resist the change. Logical arguments for change don't always resonate with your people.

What is needed is 'table' leadership. You need to gather people together around the table where they can express themselves.

As a leader, you need to sit down at the table with your people and openly discuss the reasons and rationale for change. You need to be a good listener and you should encourage dialogue and discussion and provide opportunities for people to speak who may be opposed to the change. When gathered around the table, people become less formal and begin to open up with each other as they honestly share their feelings and concerns.

3. Accept  the fact that some of the best thinking is done with others. Leaders who think they know the best answers miss a great opportunity for the kind of collaborative leadership that can provide valuable additional insights. The more input you have from others who may share different perspectives, the better will be the outcome.

4. Encourage people to personally share their thoughts with you and give them your cell phone number and invite them to text you with additional thoughts and insights. Expressing genuine concern, especially to those who may be reluctant to accept a particular change, is important in winning people over to you your perspective.

5. Always remember that people must have reasons for change. They must be able to see the value of change, and a good leader will never stop communicating the value and benefits of change that he envisions.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. Keep in mind what Mark Twain once said: "The only one who likes change is a wet baby."

Leadership Thought: On Good Friday Jesus Died to Make You New.

Dear Friends,

On this Good Friday, I wanted to share my favorite poem.  I first heard it spoken at a Fellowship of Christian Athlete’s Conference over 60 years ago, and it meant so much to me at that time that I felt compelled to memorize it. Today it remains one of the only poems I still can still recite from memory.

It was written by Myra Welch who said she wrote it in 30 minutes. The finished poem was sent anonymously to the editor of her local church news bulletin. She felt it was a gift from God and didn’t need her name on it.

It is the timeless message of spiritual transformation that takes place when Jesus touches and changes one’s life. 

'Twas battered and scarred, and the auctioneer
      Thought it scarcely worth his while
To waste much time on the old violin,
      But held it up with a smile.
"What am I bidden, good folks," he cried,
    "Who'll start the bidding for me?"
"A dollar, a dollar. Then two! Only two?
      Two dollars, and who'll make it three?"

"Three dollars, once; three dollars, twice;
      Going for three…" But no,
From the room, far back, a grey-haired man
      Came forward and picked up the bow;
Then wiping the dust from the old violin,
      And tightening the loosened strings,
He played a melody pure and sweet,
      As a caroling angel sings.

The music ceased, and the auctioneer,
      With a voice that was quiet and low,
Said: "What am I bid for the old violin?"
      And he held it up with the bow.
"A thousand dollars, and who'll make it two?
      Two thousand! And who'll make it three?
Three thousand, once; three thousand, twice,
    And going and gone," said he.

The people cheered, but some of them cried,
    "We do not quite understand.
What changed its worth?" Swift came the reply:
    "The touch of the Master's hand."
And many a man with life out of tune,
      And battered and scarred with sin,
Is auctioned cheap to the thoughtless crowd
      Much like the old violin.

A "mess of pottage," a glass of wine,
    A game — and he travels on.
He is "going" once, and "going" twice,
    He's "going" and almost "gone."
But the Master comes, and the foolish crowd
    Never can quite understand
The worth of a soul and the change that is wrought
    By the touch of the Master's hand.

                                      

 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: the old has gone, the new is here!" - 2 Corinthians 5:17.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

 

 

 

Leadership Thought: Connecting with Negative People and Transforming Relationships.

"Relationships with negative people. Are simply tedious encounters with porcupines. You don't have the remote knowledge how to be close to them without quills being shot in your direction." Shannon. L. Alder.

Dear Friend,

“Tell me something good.” “What’s not good?” What will you do to make it good?” These are three wonderful expressions to help you  connect with people who you might normally seek to avoid.

I am indebted to Jon Gordon, author, corporate trainer and popular speaker  for these three statement/questions  which provide a way to confront negative people. These ‘Debby Downers,’ and “The Sky Is Falling” kind of people are hard to be around and often when we see them coming, we are tempted to run in the other direction.

But these three statement/questions provide an opportunity to turn a potentially negative conversation into a positive and productive one.

“Tell me something good,” starts the conversation on a positive note. You initiate and control the conversation, and prevent it from tail spinning in a negative direction.

“What’s not good,” shows that you care about the other person, and you are not just a ”pie in the sky” kind of person who ignores the reality of problems but wants to make them better.

And finally, “How can we make it good, indicates your desire to help come up with a solution that will address the person’s  problem or particular need.

Good leaders are always looking to focus on the positive and not the negative. They are anxious to look for solutions to difficult problems. They seek to engage with negative people  and show them the value of keeping communication positive and uplifting.

The next time you are tempted to avoid that critical person, why not try using the positive approach? And if you do, you might discover you become engaged in more positive and meaningful conversations.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom