Leadership Thought: The Priceless Gift of Jesus' Laughter

Dear Friend,

This picture of Jesus was a special gift that I will treasure for the rest of my life.

It was given to me by a friend who was a member of a church I once pastored in the 80's. 

This past Friday, I visited this church again to participate in a celebration of their 200th anniversary. The visit was a memorable occasion as I participated in their worship service and then enjoyed a wonderful meal with the whole church family. I also spent some time with pastors who served with and before me. 

While there, I saw Don Thomas, a gifted artist who was a long-time member of the church. Don had graciously presented Jean and me with a beautiful oil painting, which I proudly displayed in my office. 

While in his home, Don, who is in his 90s, led me upstairs to his studio, which was full of his paintings. He asked me to pick out one of his paintings as a gift, which I did, but then I saw a picture of Jesus hanging on the wall, and it completely captured my attention. It was the above picture of Jesus who appeared to be laughing. I asked him about the picture, and he told me he painted it because he always wanted people to see the human side of Jesus, who like us, could laugh and smile and express great joy. 

He said over the years he had so many inquiries about the picture that he made a large number of copies, and he wanted me to have one. This picture is now one of my proudest possessions.  

Sometimes we forget the human side of Jesus. Like us He laughed, cried, got tired and yes, at times even got angry, calling religious leaders whitewashed tombs.

We forget that Jesus was in every way like us, except for sin. 

It has been said that there is no more effective testimony of a changed life than a winsome spirit

Such winsome people are just plain fun to  be around. They exude joy, and their laughter is contagious.

As Christians we talk a lot about love, and faith and hope-fruits of the spirit- but we often forget that second on that list known as the fruit of the spirit is joy.

As someone has said, "joy is the flag flying high above the castle of the heart announcing that God is in residence there."

Fun and laughter should be regular ingredients in a Christian's life. These qualities can make us more relatable. As believers, we should be joyful, playful, fun loving, and even whimsical and those possessing these qualities are generally the most attractive people to be around. Who wants to hang with stern, somber, humorless, lemon sucking killjoys who have no appreciation for a few laughs and a little bit of whimsy? 

As Christians, we should be fun to be with. Our personality should pave the way for the building of relationships,  relationships that often open the door for the communication of the gospel.

 So, followers of Christ, let's lighten up a bit and put a little more laughter into our lives. Let's laugh a little more and show the world that those who bear the name of Christ are the happiest people alive. And why shouldn't we be, for we are the possessors of abundant and eternal life. 

And don't  forget that "a joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.  (Proverbs 17: 22).

Martin Luther wrote, "If you're not allowed to laugh in heaven, I don't want to go there," and neither do I.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Recovery and Evangelism Takes Time - Are We Prepared to Take the Time?

Dear Friends,

If you have ever been involved with those struggling with addiction, you know the road to recovery can be a series of successes and failures.

I well remember a testimony I heard several years ago from a speaker at an addiction ministry that we offered at our church.

The person shared her story of recovery which involved one relapse after another.  For her it was one start after another, and each start ended the same-a return to her addictive behavior.

Throughout her many failures, the speaker testified that there were always people in her life who supported her and encouraged her on her journey to recovery.  They didn't give up on her, and they kept reminding her that the power of Christ could break the bondage of her addiction.

Like finding Christ, finding the road to recovery is not always a onetime event. Recovery can be a lengthy process that takes place over a  period of time.  

Seeds that are planted don't sprout up overnight. You can't rush the process. Each seed has a certain timetable before its flower is produced. Think about your own life. How many people did God send into your life before you received Jesus and experienced life change? If you were lucky, you had people around you who were persistent in loving and praying for you, and it was their persistence that encouraged you, especially during those times when you were ready to give up.

Fortunately, our speaker had friends who were committed to her recovery and who were with her for the long haul. Even when they failed to see the changes in her life for which they  hoped, they never gave up on her. Because of their patience and persistent love and their constant and continued encouragement in the face of her many failures, she now enjoys seven years of sobriety, and like last night, she is now sharing the story of her faith-based recovery journey to help others find hope.

Often in our efforts to see evangelize someone saved,  we feel we must give them the whole gospel, and when they don't immediately pray the sinner's prayer, we feel like we have failed, and are tempted to give up on them. However, if we assume responsibility for the success of our evangelistic efforts, we assume something that is not ours to assume. 

The same is true for the recovering addict. They may need to fail a number of times before they experience and embrace the change in their lives we hope to see. During their recovery process they need people around them who will continue to love and encourage them as they seek lasting recovery. 

As believers we are called to be witnesses. Those were our Savior's marching orders. We are reminded in1 Peter 3:15 that we are “to always be prepared to give an account to everyone who asks us for the hope that we have within us,” but we are never the ones ultimately responsible for the person's decision. 

Campus Crusade for Christ (now Cru) has a wonderful definition for evangelism: "Evangelism is sharing Christ in the power of the Holy Spirit and leaving the results up to God." We are not the ones responsible for the person's salvation. We may deliver the message, but it is God who opens the door to a person's heart. When we understand this, we will never feel a sense of failure, regardless of the person's response to our message.

Whether you are witnessing to someone about Christ, or patiently witnessing to them about recovery, we need to be patient and persistent in offering our love and encouragement. Don't ever give up on them and continue to let them know that you will always be there for them, even when they fail to demonstrate the change you desire to see in their life.

Proverbs remind us that "The righteous falls seven times and rises again" (Prov.24:6), and it just may be that it is that seventh time that he/she discovers Christ or experiences recovery.

Whether witnessing to Christ or encouraging someone on the road to sobriety, patient and persistent love are the keys to success.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: The Day I Almost Quit My Church

Dear Friends,

Several months ago, I spent time reflecting on all the people and events that during my life had shaped and impacted my life and ministry. I was surprised by the number I was able to recall.  Without these people and events, I know that my life and ministry would be dramatically different today. 

I then decided to develop a "Thankful List" in which I described how God used each of those people and events to make a difference in my life and ministry.  At this point I have almost thirty people and events described on that “Thankful List" and my list is still growing.

This weekend I am traveling seven hours east to Greenville, Pa. to celebrate with people who are included on my "Thankful List." It happens that the church is celebrating its 200th anniversary, and to commemorate this occasion, the church has invited all the pastors who have previously served the church to attend a weekend celebration.

Let me share with you the words I wrote in describing why First Presbyterian Greenville was so special to me and why the church was included on my Thankful List.

                 First Presbyterian  Church in Greenville, Pa

Midway through my seven years of ministry in Greenville, Pa, I was growing weary. I was feeling discouraged, and I was thinking I had accomplished everything I could do.  At the time I thought only Jean was aware of my restless spirit, and my longing for a change. I had reached the point where I was now considering a church change, when unbeknownst to me, word had leaked out that I was feeling like the end of my ministry in Greenville was coming to a close.

It was a week or two before Valentine’s Day, when I was suddenly surprised by the volume of Valentine cards that were appearing in my mailbox. Inside those envelopes were cards with handwritten notes of encouragement, each screaming out the words, "We love you, and we appreciate your ministry." They kept on coming, piling up on my desk, even after Valentine's Day.

To this day, I have no idea who or how this mailing campaign was orchestrated, but I do remember how my heart was touched and encouraged by the church’s love and support for me and our family. My longing for a new situation quickly became a thing of the past, as I began  one of the most productive and rewarding times of any ministry I have ever had.

Today I am thankful for the three extra years of ministry my family and I enjoyed with those wonderful Greenville people who 'loved me back home.'

I share this story because it is an example of how encouragement can change one’s heart. It is true that encouragement is oxygen to the soul, and everyone needs it. It revitalizes, refreshes and restores us, and it’s what keeps pastors from giving up when facing those dark days of discouragement.

Pastoring a church can sometimes become discouraging, and I wonder how many pastors might  have quit too soon were it not for the loving encouragement they received from their people.

Pastor Appreciation Day must never be limited to just one day; it must be celebrated daily, so why not celebrate it today by dropping a note of appreciation to your pastor(s).I know that they will be glad you did.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Needed Today- High Road Leaders

Dear Friends,

Our country is in difficult straits. We desperately need a new brand of leader, the kind that will put aside his/her own interests to serve the interests of others. 

Today many of us have become disillusioned and bitter over partisan politics. We need new leadership, the kind who will look to find common ground and shared values that will help unite us rather than divide us. Such individuals are known as 'high road leaders' and they possess certain qualities that make them well suited for the leadership task.

High road leaders are those who always give more than they receive. They focus on the well-being of others; instead of promoting themselves, they look for the good in all people and seek to bring out the best in them. 

Many leaders today expect people to serve them and help them get to the top, but a high road leader is more concerned about helping others get to the top. 

High road leaders are known to possess servant hearts, and they are more interested in meeting the needs of others than meeting their own needs.  

High road leaders always give more than they take. They do so because they know that if they care for the people they lead, those people will love, respect, and want to work hard for them.

High road leaders bring people together instead of dividing them.

They place the agendas of others ahead of their own.

Such leadership is not a natural way of leading, but it can be life changing.

When you serve others, you seek to bring them along with you on the leadership journey because you know you can’t help another person get to the top without getting to the top yourself.

High road leaders view themselves as servants and not celebrities. They know that when they serve others everyone wins. They recognize everyone is important to the success of an organization, and they treat everyone with that same respect.

The late Herb Kelleher, president of Southwest Airlines, was a perfect model of high road leadership.

He treated people like family. He said, “I’d rather have a company bound by love than a company bound by fear.” The results of his leadership are clearly seen in the success of Southwest  that enjoyed 46 consecutive years of profitability.

Herb learned from his mother that every person and every job is worth as much as any other person and any other job. He deplored class mentality. Years ago, one of his executive officers said, “Herb, it’s harder for me to get to see you than it is for a mechanic, a pilot, a flight attendant, or a reservation agent.” Half-jokingly, Herb said, “I can explain that to you very easily, they’re more important than you are!” (Southwest Airlines Employees, Customers Remember Founder Herb Kelleher-taken from the internet)

Those who worked for Herb were his priority They were not perceived by him as just another rung on the ladder, but as equals, and those who worked for Herb loved him.

High Road leadership sounds a lot like servant leadership, the kind where the leader carries a towel and a basin and is always on the lookout for ways to serve others.

God is always looking for towel and basin leaders who are more concerned with service  than status,  faithfulness than fame.

Herb Kelleher and other high road leaders aspired to live out the mission statement of Jesus as expressed in His words: “I have given you an example that you should do as I have done for you” (John 13:15).

May God help each of us be “high road” leaders today and every day.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: You Don't See Movies Like That Anymore

Dear Friends,

"You don’t see movies like that anymore, do you?  it was amazing!" 

Such was the response from Sandy Manchella, a friend from St Louis I met several years ago at a restaurant in Henderson Harbor, a little town a few miles from where I  spend my summers. She was working as a waitress for her brother who had just opened the restaurant, and we became instant friends. How that happened is a subject for another story, but now being on my Leadership Thought mailing list, she e-mailed me the introductory words to my message above. She wanted to let me know about the movie she had just seen.

The movie, Soul on Fire, is about the life of John O' Leary. who as a child suffered burns over 100 percent of his body. Doctors gave him little to no chance of survival. However,  because of the encouragement of Jack Buck, a legendary play by play broadcaster for the St Louis Cardinals, a janitor, who every day faithfully cleaned and disinfected his room, and a nurse who wouldn't let young John give up on himself during those darkest days of his life, John survived to become one of the most popular speakers in the world.

Even before I had learned about him from Sandy, I had come to know John through his writing. His stories and his life experiences were always a source of  great inspiration and encouragement to me, so when I learned they were making a movie about his life I was eager to see it.

So yesterday, on a cold and blustery day, I ventured forth to see what probably will be my only movie of the year, and how glad I was for the choice I made. 

If you are anything like me who averages one movie a year, then this is the one movie you must see. 

For those of you who live in my area it is being shown in theaters in the Monmouth Mall and in Hazlet.

I know this is not a typical Leadership Thought, but I hope my message, and one of John's messages which I share below, will provide you enough encouragement for you to  experience the movie for yourself.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Connecting with People and a Book That Saved Me $4,000

Dear Friends,

Investor Warren Buffett states the ability to speak and connect with people is the most important ability a person could ever develop, and I believe he is right. It is one thing to communicate with people: it's another thing to connect with them. The turmoil taking place in today’s political world is a perfect example of what happens when people communicate and yet are unable to connect. 

I believe the most important key in communication is possessing a genuine interest in the other person.

Good communicators forget about themselves in their effort to connect with others.

They know that it is important to be genuinely interested in what the other person has to say.

Good communicators are always looking for ways to add value to others. They forget about themselves and always look for ways to make the other person feel important. 

It is very true that people don't care about how much you know until they know how much you care, and they may forget what you say, but they will never forget how you made them feel

When looking to connect with people, we must put everything else aside. We must sacrifice our own time, interests, and concerns and focus completely on their needs Our goal is never to impress but to be impressed, and to make the other person feel that he/she is the most important person in the room.

Good listeners are empathetic. They are anxious to learn how the other person feels, and so they listen not only with their ears, but they listen with their heart.

Those seeking to connect with others are curious to learn more about the  person, so they ask relevant questions to move the conversation forward to gain greater clarity on how the person feels so they are better able to help the person.

In his classic book How to Win Friends and Influence People, a book that should be required reading for anyone interested in learning how to connect with people, Dale Carnegie states that that "the sweetest word to a person’s ear is his own name. Remembering names is an important part of connecting with others and using the person's name in your conversation is not only a helpful way of increasing your connection but assisting you in remembering the person's name long after your visit.

Good communicators are always looking for memorable moments that might cement one's relationship. 

Last week I met with the orthopedic surgeon who is going to perform my second hip replacement. He is the same doctor that performed my initial hip surgery 30 years ago. When he walked into the room, I was reading a book on leadership by John Maxwell.  After briefly chatting about the last time we saw each other over 30 years ago, he asked me about the book I was reading. 

I told him of my interest in leadership, and he commented that he had been asked to lead a conference in Naples, Florida for 2,000 orthopedic surgeons on the topic of building and leading your medical team.  I pointed to the book and offered it to him,  I said, "I think you will find some good information in it for your message."  He initially declined, but when I insisted,  he took it, and I facetiously remarked that I would trade him the book for my surgery. He laughed, and after his lengthy assessment of my hip was completed, we discussed the cost since I knew he didn't take Medicare. He told me the cost, and then he said, "I am going to knock off $ 4,000 from my normal fee."

Of course I was grateful for his generosity, so I followed up our conversation by sending him a letter of appreciation along with a devotional book on encouragement that I had written, and a week later I got a personal note from him indicating that each day he was reading a devotional from my book, and  that he found the other book I had given him very helpful in preparing the message he was giving in Naples.

Special stories and shared experiences like this have a way of cementing relationships. In my case a John Maxwell book, How to Be a People Person, not only saved me $4,000, but helped cement a connection that I suspect neither of us will ever forget. 

A friend laughingly suggested I should charge him the balance of the surgery for the  book I sent, and  I said to him that it wouldn’t be fair, for I knew in my heart that my book was not all that good and certainly worth far less that the balance I owed him.

The story and our connection to be continued…

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Teaching Leadership Lessons at the Staff Level

Dear Friends,

Most of my day yesterday was spent in New York city  at the Hospital for Special Surgery where I was having preoperative testing for a hip replacement that was scheduled for October 22nd.

Thirty years ago I had a hip replacement on the same hip, but because I had heart stent surgery performed in  June, the doctor felt it was prudent to push back another surgery for at least six months, so the surgery will now be scheduled for late November or early December which means I will have  to continue limping around  in this old body for a couple more months.

Thanks to all of you who have been praying for me during time, and please continue to pray as I wait for my new scheduled surgery.

As one who has always been interested in developing leaders, I would frequently do leadership training with my staff. Equipping leaders is a key part of every leader’s responsibility, so I am always looking for ways to teach leadership principles at staff meetings. I have found that leadership is often best learned together when the leader and all of the team members sit around a table teaching and learning from one another.

The good leader recognizes that he/she doesn't know all of the answers to every leadership issue, but together with your team, those answers can often be discovered through informal around the table  discussions.

I know  that everything gets better when people get together, for as leadership expert John Maxwell reminds us, "one is always too small a number to achieve greatness." It is amazing what transpires when a group of people get together to learn about leadership. Yes, two heads are always better than one.

One productive way I have found to teach leadership is by providing a list of leadership principles and then providing opportunities for members to discuss them, while sharing their own personal examples of how those principles have been experienced and lived out in their own personal lives. In so doing, everyone is engaged, and every team member has the opportunity to not only become a learner but also a leader. 

Here a just a few leadership principles that lend might lend themselves to informative learning discussions .

“Relationships are forged, not formed. They require time and  common experience.”

“We can do anything, but we can’t do everything.”

“If you want to go up, there must be things that you are willing to give up

“Never take a journey along; always take someone with you.”

“Pass credit when the sweat is still on their brow.”

These are just a few of the possible statements that you could discuss, but you can come up with your own list that addresses the leadership principles you wish to instill in the hearts and minds of your people.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Shining the Light of Christ's Character in the Athletic Arena

Dear Friends,

Today we have lost many of the wonderful values that once characterized athletic competition. We have experienced cheating scandals and witnessed coaches and teams that will do almost anything to gain an advantage, even if it means skirting the rules to accomplish their goals.  

The sports' world is full of such  stories. Today some coaches teach their players to fake injuries on the field to stop the clock. Teams routinely spy on one another's practices to gain an upper hand. Winning at any cost has become the rule and no longer the exception, and as a coach and  longtime baseball umpire it troubles me, for I know the wonderful values  of respect and integrity athletics can promote. Something has been lost  today on the field and courts of competition, and it is the value of character development.

A year ago, I was the only umpire working a freshman high school baseball game, and I was working behind the plate when I got blocked out by the batter on a steal of third. I couldn't see the play and having to make a quick decision I guessed he was safe, but unfortunately, I guessed wrong , as he was clearly out.  Everyone - the fans, the players and the third base coach, knew I had blown the call and that the visiting team's runner was out and that I had unfortunately called him safe. I huddled up with the coaches, explained the situation, and while both coaches knew he was out, the third base coach said to me you called him safe, and you can't reverse the call. He was right technically, but I had hoped he would have enough integrity to acknowledge my mistake and admit his runner was out. Unfortunately, he did not do this.

To the credit of the home team's coach, also a teacher, he simply walked away disappointed in the opposing coach's attitude and unwillingness to see my mistaken call rectified. To his credit, he used the situation to teach his players that mistakes will happen on the field and in life, and that day those players learned a very valuable lesson in character development. 

On my way home after the game I thought of some of the values we sought to instill in our athletes while I was athletic director at Calvary Christian Academy in Fort Lauderdale.

I thought of Emma Kimso,  who was dribbling up the floor when she noticed the girl who was guarding her had fallen down. She calmly stopped her dribble, helped the girl up, and then picked up her dribble  and headed to the basket where she scored a layup. The official later said to me, "I had no. Idea what to do or what to call."

Some might scoff at such an act, and while admitting it might be a selfless action, they would say it  was completely out of place in the midst of  such competition. My answer to that would be that  we need more Emma Kimso's today. 

I long for those young people who, while giving their best in the sport they are playing, have not lost sight of the fact that "letting your light shine," means  just that- "letting your light shine,"  and that  "light shining" is never out of place, regardless of where it takes place.

Who won the game? I honestly don't remember and frankly I don't care.  All I want to remember is a young lady who for a short moment demonstrated the kind of behavior that makes me proud to have been a coach and athletic director. 

And then only a few days later our wrestling team continued to "let their light shine"  when team members  led two competitors to Christ. Two members of the Eagle team had learned how to share they faith and they witnessed to two opposing team members and led them in a prayer to receive Jesus Christ. How exciting to know that our athletes were integrally involved in God's spiritual harvest

And then I remember how we always had an opening prayer before every home game and how our basketball players would meet at center court following our games to pray with opposing team members, and how our football team would do the same.

I miss seeing or hearing about these kinds of examples today. 

May we be quick to remember that as fans, coaches and players, we need to emulate the quality of sportsmanship reflected in the lives of these young athletes who did not hide their lights under a bushel but in word and deed brightly shined forth the light of Christ's character as they modeled moral and spiritual character, something that is extremely rare in our sports' world today. May their tribe increase.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: So, You too Struggle to Share Your Faith

Dear Friends,

I remember one of the first times I shared my faith. I was a young pastor outside of Syracuse, N. Y. and I had been to a conference on evangelism. I knew as a pastor I needed to share my faith more often than I was doing. 

I decided that I would visit the home of Don and Mary Wallburger who had visited our church several times.

I purposely parked my car far enough  from their home, so  that they wouldn't notice me if I chickened out  and left without being noticed.

I remember approaching their door in fear as I offered a few light taps on the door hoping they wouldn't hear them, so I could avoid doing what I knew God had called me to do. Quite frankly this young pastor was scared to death to share my faith.

The Wallburgers did hear the knock and opened the door, and for the next hour I tried to share my faith. I bumbled and stumbled through a gospel presentation, and while they graciously listened, I knew I was not connecting. After what seemed like an eternity, I left embarrassed, feeling like a complete failure in my efforts to reach them for Christ. I am happy to say, however, that this wonderful couple did eventually pray to receive Him in spite of my ineffective witness.

Perhaps your first experience witnessing was something like mine, and you too felt like a complete failure. You  were fearful because you felt untrained and ill equipped to share the faith.

At that point I could have decided to write off evangelism because of my colossal failure. I could have said I don't have the gift of evangelism and left witnessing to others, except for the fact that I knew every Christian has been called to share his faith.

The greatest obstacle to sharing our faith is fear, and almost every believer has to overcome that initial fear. What if those to whom I speak reject me? What if they are not interested in what I have to share or I can't remember any of the verses, and I make a complete fool of myself?

I have news for you. Almost everyone who witnesses for the first time feels that way I  did.

The key to witnessing is to remind ourselves again and again that we are not alone and that the omnipotent One, the Lord Almighty is speaking for us and through us. We are only his vessels, His messengers, and it is the power of the Holy Spirit that takes our imperfect words and uses them to pierce the heart of the unbelieving soul. 

Jesus says, "You shall be my witnesses' when the Holy Spirit comes upon you," and you can be confident that  He will come upon you when you are faithful to share the truth of the gospel. "It is not by might or power,” says the Lord, but it is by my Spirit," and when you trust not in your own abilities but trust completely in the Holy Spirit you can be sure you will always be successful

I love that wonderful definition of  witnessing used by Campus Crusade for Christ: "Witnessing is sharing Christ in the power of the Holy Spirit and leaving the results up to God." 

You are successful whether or not the person comes to Christ. You success comes not from your results but from your obedience. You are faithful, regardless of the results.

I love the words of Matt Smethurst who states in Before You Share Your Faith these words: "Imagine- especially if you didn't grow up in a Christian home- if the person who first spoke the gospel to you had instead been frozen by fear. What if they had concluded, No, Lord, not me! I'm still not equipped, still not ready. Plus, the environment isn't ideal. Where might you be today?" 

Witnessing is for every believer, and I hope you will heed His call to be faithful in sharing the transforming Gospel message that once changed your life.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: How to Add Value to Others by Simple Acts of Love

Dear Friends,

What keeps me up at night or wakes me up early in the morning to write these Leadership Thoughts?  It’s an intentional desire to add value to people. I hope and pray that each message I share makes a difference in each person who reads them.

Many years ago, I remember reading a quote by author and speaker Zig Ziglar who taught that “If you help enough people get what they want, they will help you get what you want.

The stories are too numerous to share of how this principle has been born out in my life

Albert Schweitzer writes “The purpose of human life is to serve, and to show compassion and possess the will to help others.”

Valuing others doesn’t come naturally, for we are born with a selfish and sinful nature that would much rather be helped than help, served than serve, and loved than love. Valuing and putting others first won’t come naturally but can only be done with intentionally. We must always be on the lookout for ways to add value to others.

We must constantly be looking for opportunities to make a difference in people’s lives, for service to others seldom happens by accident.

The idea of adding value to others started early for me when I realized by simply holding the door  for someone, as simple as it was, would not only  add value to others,  but also add value  to someone and bring pleasure to me.

.I will never forget an illustration by my favorite teacher John Maxwell. He demonstrated the example on stage by using his hands to show that when you pushed someone down, you had to go down with them, but when you lifted them up, you not only lifted them up but you lifted yourself up as well. This simple illustration has stuck with me throughout my life, and it has been  a constant reminder of the fact that when you lift others up you lift yourself up as well.

I recently read of a pastor who described a man in his city who stood on a street corner holding up a sign reading FREE HUGS. The pastor commented that at first, he thought it was strange, but his heart was quickly changed when he saw the stream of people lining up to receive a free hug.

Just this past week, I closed our early morning prayer time with what I call a “holy hug.” We all get together in a circle and press in as tight inwardly as we can, and then I pray. Simple, yes, but oh so meaningful to feel the warm embrace of your brothers and sisters.

As a coach I was always on the lookout for ways to add value to my players through encouragement.  I would sometime stop our  practice to point out someone who went above and beyond what was expected.

 I will never forget the words of a coach who taught me to always encourage others when the sweat was still on their brow, and I have taken that message to heart.

Some of these illustrations seem like little things, but they are not, for there is never a little gesture of love or some form of encouragement  that ever goes unnoticed by our heavenly Father.

Who doesn’t like a hug, a hand around your shoulder, or a clap on the back. I will never forget the coach who reminded me “ that a pat on the back is only a few inches removed from a kick in the pants, but oh what a difference those a few inches make.”

If you and I will start our day praying to be “plus people” whose goal is to add value to others, and if we will always living intentionally, always on the lookout for ways to add value to others, there is no telling the difference we can make in our community, our nation and our world.

Words and works of selflessness will not only make a difference in the lives of others but in your life as well.

Every day let us give our time, share our knowledge, and offer our gifts and in so doing each of us we will become more like Jesus.

Jesus valued everyone, He loved everyone, He served everyone, and He never missed an opportunity to make people feel valued and you and I ought to be doing the same, seeking for ways to turn minus people into plus people.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Leadership Thoughts: Quotes I Shared with My Basketball Team Twenty-Five Years Ago

Dear Friends,

Twenty-five years ago, I had the privilege of becoming the first  school chaplain,  and first athletic director of Calvary Christian Academy in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

The school was born from a congregation of 16,000 where I was one of 22 pastors. 

From humble beginnings in 2000 when the school started  with 200 students, the school has now grown to become the largest Christian School in the country with an enrollment of almost 3000 students. 

From the school’s beginning when I coached our first basketball team of 8th graders who played on an outdoor court while the first gym was being constructed, the school has  excelled athletically winning a number of  state championships in baseball, basketball and track and field. In the last few years, our basketball team was ranked among the top five schools nationally among all public and private schools in the county. Now with three gyms, and a 7-million-dollar field house, the school’s enrollment continues to grow both athletically and academically.

In each of the last three years I have had the privilege of spending a week at the school visiting coaches and teachers, some who are still there while I was teaching and coaching.  I still marvel at the growth and development of the school, but the quality that impresses me the most about the school is their continued commitment to developing the spiritual and moral character of every student. 

As I reflected on my eight years as pastor, teacher, coach, chaplain and athletic director, I thought of some of the values I sought to instill in my teams and in my family of athletic coaches.

Yesterday I pulled out a book of quotes that I would often share and discuss with my players at the beginning of each and every practice. Yes, I worked hard to develop their basketball abilities, but more importantly I was fully committed, as are the schools' coaches today, to the development of their moral and spiritual character. 

As I thumbed through some of the quotes from that book, I thought a few of them might be helpful to you as you teach and coach your own children and grandchildren. When I recorded the sources of the quotes, I included them, but unfortunately, I didn't always write them down.

 

            Some of the Quotes from My Personal Notebook

“The best way to inspire change is to be the change you want to see.”

“Act the way you'd like to be, and soon you'll be the way you act.” 

 “Only the guy who isn't rowing has time to rock the boat.”

“The only thing that walks back from the grave and refuses to be buried is the character of a man”.

“Character consists of what you do on the 3rd and 4th tries.” Senator Dan Coats

“It is not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.” Walt Disney

“Live in such a way that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.” Will Rogers.

“The secret of success is to start from scratch and keep on scratching.”

“You can't make another person feel important, if you secretly think he is a nobody”. 

“Place a ten on everyone's forehead.” 

“Treat people as the most important people in the world, and you will communicate that they are somebody to you.” 

“Consider it a wasted day when you have not learned something new or peered into the mystery of God's grace and wisdom.” William Barclay

“Pass credit while the sweat is still on their brow.”

“Once you learn to quit, it becomes a habit”. Vince Lombardi

“To ignore evil is to be a partner in it.” Martin Luther King

“Character consists of what you do on the 3rd and 4th tries.” James Michener.

“Flatter me, and I may not believe you, criticize me and he may not like you,  ignore me, and I may not forgive you, but encourage me,  and I will never forget you.” 

“A clear conscience never fears midnight knocking.” Chinese proverb 

“Kind words are short and easy to speak, but their echoes are endless.”  Mother Teresa.

“Touch a person's heart before you ask them for their hand.”

“Believing in people before they prove themselves is the key to motivating people to reach their potential.”

“Don't be a tombstone encourager; encourage them now.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: The Two Greatest Obstacles to Sharing Our Faith

Dear Friends.

Two of the greatest obstacles to evangelism are fear and the absence of love.

Too often we are afraid to share the gospel because we fear we might offend the person. We are afraid of impacting our relationship. What if our friend not only rejects the gospel, but rejects us as well, and so out of fear we avoid the risk of speaking about Jesus.

The other reason is love. If our motive for sharing our faith is not based on a genuine love, the person will know it and may not be interested in hearing anything we have to say. This is the great danger of cold calling and street witnessing. If you don't have any prior relationship with the person to whom you are sharing your faith, the person will feel used, just an object who is simply another scalp for your spiritual belt.

Friendship evangelism provides a healthy context for your witnessing. If the person is your friend, and knows you care, he/she will be more willing to listen to what you have to share.

While fear is a great detriment to evangelism, I believe that lack of love is an even greater barrier to evangelism.

World famous magician  Penn Jillette possesses a unique perspective on evangelism.

Gillette, who proclaims to be a proud atheist, says he doesn't respect Christians who don't witness to their faith.

"If you believe that there's a heaven and hell and people could be going to hell and not getting eternal life or whatever, and you think that it's not really worth telling them this because it would make it socially awkward...How much do you have to hate somebody to not proselytize? How much do you have to hate somebody to believe that everlasting life is possible and not tell them that?  I mean, If I believed beyond a shadow of a doubt that a truck was coming at you, and you didn't believe it-but that truck was bearing down on you- there's a certain point where I tackle you, and this is more important than that.” Before You Share Your Faith, 5 Ways to be Evangelism, Matt Smethurst, pp. 53-54.

Whether as believers we refuse to share our faith for fear of impacting a relationship, or because we really don’t love people enough to tell them how they can possess eternal life, we stand guilty before the One who commanded His disciples “to go into all the world and proclaim the gospel.”

May God forgive us when our lips are sealed, and our hearts remain frozen.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: For Those Serious about Serving Others

Dear Friends, 

It is true that leadership has more to do with service then status, for "humble work becomes holy work when it's done for God."

As part of our hospitality ministry when I served on staff at Calvary Chapel, Fort Lauderdale, the pastors would meet to pray before the services. We would pray something like this: "Lord help us have your eyes, ears, and heart that we might see, and hear, and feel as you see, hear, and feel and help us to be available for whatever ministry you might have in store for us this day." 

And so often, as we would go forth in the spirit of this prayer, God would surprise us by providing opportunities to minister to people in ways we had never anticipated. Whether praying with a person at the altar after service, helping someone who had lost some money in the soda machine, or walking with the visitor rather than directing them to the sanctuary or the nursery, we would discover that serving in such menial ways would often open the door for greater ministry. 

Saint John of the Cross, a 16th century mystic said it so well: "A Christian should always remember the value of his good works is not based on their number and excellence, (and I would add their outward significance) but on the love of God which prompts him to do these things. Little things become big things when they are done in the spirit of love."

When I think of people in the Bible who possessed servant's heart, I think of a little-known servant named Onesiphorus. Paul is in prison and his good friend Onesiphorus is searching for him. Paul writes, "May the Lord show mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chains, On the contrary, when he was in Rome, he searched hard for me until he found me" (2 Timothy 1:16-18). 

As I read these verses, I could almost feel the beat of Onesiphorus's heart as he searched hard for his good friend.  Some translations use the words, "eagerly searched," which convey the idea of intensity and determination. He was not to be thwarted in his effort to find his beloved friend and prisoner, Paul.

I close with the words of D. L. Moody who wrote: "A good many are kept out of service for Christ because they are trying to do some great thing. Let us be willing to do little things. And let us remember that nothing is small in which God is the source."

So, grab your towel and basin and begin serving. It might not be washing feet, but instead it might be something as simple as holding a hand, shedding a tear, making a meal, or offering a listening ear. Show me just such a person, and I will show you a person with a servant's heart, and one who brings great joy to the Master.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. "If I cannot do great things for God, I can do small things in a great way." James Freeman Clarke