Leadership Thought: What I Observed Last Night About Life and Athletics at a Rumson Fair Haven Red Bank Catholic Wrestling Match

Dear Friends,

Most all of my life I have been involved in athletics. From high school through college, I  played three sports. My first job after graduating from theological seminary was coaching high school football and basketball. and over the years I have coached at all levels: Pop Warner, Middle School, Junior Varsity and High School. 

My father-in-law was my high school coach and athletic director, and I spent eight years as an athletic director at Calvary Chapel Christian Academy, which today has become the largest and one of the most successful Christian schools in the country. 

I love being around sports. I've umpired high school basketball, field hockey and spent the last 30 plus years of my life umpiring high school baseball.

I've seen the best and the worst in sports and everything in between.

I might be what's called an athletic junkie. I love going to high school athletic events, and last night I watched a high school wrestling match between two exceptional wrestling teams, Rumson Fair Haven and Red Bank Catholic. 

I was rooting for Rumson Fair Haven as all my children went to school there,  and because many years ago I helped develop the Rumson Fair Haven Junior Bulldog program, I was eager to see how far they had come.

I love being in the stands watching fans cheer their teams. I enjoy the excitement and enthusiasm of the spectators and players alike, but most of all I love watching the coaches to see how they interact with their players and the officials.

When I was the athletic director at Calvary Christian Academy, we implemented a very strict athletic policy that held coaches to exceptionally high standards of conduct. 

The first sentence of our athletic policy handbook read: "Coaches will exhort all athletes to be accountable for their actions and will take every opportunity to emphasize the spiritual growth of their players at all times."

The policy went on to say: "Coaches will be alert to game and practice situations which provide opportunities for character development and the demonstration of Christian attributes."

If you were a coach and did not adhere to this athletic policy. you no longer coached. Coaches were expected to be strong Christian examples for their players.

The philosophy has been maintained long after I left the school, and the school has continued to enjoy athletic success at every level.

They have won Florida state championships in baseball, track and field, and basketball (twice) and last season their basketball team was the number one ranked high school basketball team in the country in both public and private school classifications.

I'm happy to say that athletic success and character development still go hand and hand at Calvary.

Athletics provides a wonderful opportunity to instill Christian values. Today's  coaches often have a greater impact in shaping young lives than anyone else, including pastors and even parents.

Last night I witnessed athletics at its best as two of the top wrestling teams in the area competed.  The match came down to the final two bouts which Rumson won in exciting fashion giving them the victory. 

I often hang around after athletic contests, as I love to mingle with the fans and watch the interactions of players, parents, and particularly coaches.

I did not know Joe Gallager, the losing Red Bank Catholic wrestling coach, but I was immediately intrigued as I watched the way he lovingly interacted with  each of his wrestlers and their parents. For ten minutes I stood there silently witnessing his interactions as one by one he spoke words of encouragement to every one of his wrestlers, and  to even  some of their parents. I watched as he put his arms around those wrestlers and hugged each and every one of them, and as I watched him in action, I thought to myself that this is the kind of coach I would love to play for.

From what I saw last night, I suspect Coach Gallager is the kind of coach who shouts praise and whispers criticism.

I imagine he is the kind of coach that knows what's going on with his players and helps them become  the best version of themselves they can become.

I am sure he discusses the impact of education on their futures and learns each of their personalities. 

He probably relates well to his players and knows their interests and discusses the why's behind his decisions. 

I suspect he shows his players that he cares about them, not only on the wrestling mat but in the classroom as well. 

I assume he is concerned about them not just being successful in athletic endeavors, but he wants them to learn how to be  good people. 

I am confident that he tells them and shows them he believes in them, and he teaches them how to work together as a team.

And above all, I can only hope he shares his faith with them as I was privileged to do throughout my years of coaching, for the true measure of  coaching success is never determined by a coach's  wins and losses but by the players' character and the depth of the faith that is fashioned in their lives as a result of his relationship with each of them.

Every coach stands on the threshold of something far greater than athletic success and achievement, That coach stands in the doorway that opens to eternal truth and everlasting life, and those who walk through that doorway will be forever grateful for that their coach has taught  them more than just the x's and o's of their particular sport, but has teaches them how to value life, and themselves, and others, and  most importantly Jesus, who teaches us the supreme lessons of life: how to love and serve others.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. For some of the coaching insights above, I am indebted to Ryan Tyrrell who has written an article "Be Positive-10 Ways to Have a Positive Impact on Athletes as a Coach."