Friday, October 30, 2020

Leadership Thought: The Elephant, Donkey and Lamb and What I Learned about How to Win Friends to Jesus Thanks to Matt Agresti.

Dear Friend,

Last night Jean and I were gathered around the dinner table celebrating my grandson’s 11th birthday, and during our time together politics and the election sneaked into our discussion. Notwithstanding our political preferences, we all concluded that we were tired of  the hateful political rhetoric coming from both sides, which spews hatred and divides friends. 

My daughter Rachel  shared with us how her pastor had preached a sermon on “The Donkey, Elephant and  Lamb”, and I was so intrigued by the title that I rose extra early this morning to listen to it. It was preached  by a good friend, Matt Agresti, who is one of the pastors at Park Church where my daughter and her husband  attend.

I wrote Matt this morning to tell him how blessed I was by his message, and that I planned to steal some of his material. As my friend Harry Flaherty, the state director or the Fellowship of Christian Athlete’s, says, "If it is worth preaching, it is worth stealing," so here goes a part of Matt’s  pilfered message.

Matt discussed the ways we react to people with whom we disagree. We can choose to "fight," that is argue, vigorously defending our position regardless of the cost to our friendship. Or we can  "flee" (flight) and look for the quickest way to disengage and escape the argument, an approach that many  a ‘political pacifist’ might take. But there is a third option that we as believers might take, and that is to choose to love and listen to those with whom we disagree. After all, didn’t Jesus say something about loving our enemies and praying for them, and going the extra mile…and you probably have memorized some other parts of that  same message we call The Sermon the Mount.

Instead of fight or flight, when you are gathered around the Thanksgiving Table this year, and Angry Alex begins to spew his political hatred toward the one who won the election, you can choose to use curiosity and kindness to diffuse the conversation and keep those at the table from fighting or fleeing, or worse yet, never speaking to one another again.

Matt suggest we make  curiosity and kindness our starting points. “I am curious to learn why you believe as you do,” and then spend the next few minutes seriously listening to the other person’s response without thinking of how you are going to negatively combat his reply.  And once you have done your listening, you might ask a second question and that is, “I am curious to know how you have come to the conclusion you did.” The why and the how of curiosity provide an opportunity to hear the other person with the sincere desire of learning why the person feels the way they do.

To listen and genuinely want to learn from the other person is to show  kindness which is the second point that Matt shares in seeking to respond in a way that reflects the kindness of our Master. "What does being prochoice mean to you and how did you arrived at that conclusion," is a much better way of starting a productive conversation than “How could you call yourself a Christian and be prochoice?” I am sure you get my drift.

How many hearts will we change by fighting with someone with whom we disagree or fleeing from those who hold different views from us? The answer is not many. Cancel culture says I write you off, delete you from Facebook, say goodbye to our friendship-all because you don’t agree with me and you don’t think like I do. Curiosity and kindness say, “I am interested in what you believe and why you believe it, and I will be kind enough to listen to you and try to understand your views.”  To take this approach doesn’t necessarily mean you are going to win, if winning an argument is your goal, (and I hope it is not), but it does meant that you might build a relationship that provides on going opportunities to share your love for Jesus in a way that might lead to a friend’s changed heart.

To be kind is to care for the other person. To be kind is to love your enemies, and to walk the extra mile, and to pray for those who persecute you, and yes to invite ‘strangers’ to your table in hopes they might just become your friends and ultimately the friends of Jesus-all  because you were curious and kind. Just a thought.

Have a great weekend

Tom

To listen to Matt's sermon which I would encourage you to do, google Park Church Tinton Falls and click on Matt's message on Oct 25

Thursday, October 29, 2020

Leadership Thought: How Much Compassion Do We Have in Our Hearts?

Dear Family,

There is an ancient legend about a monk who found a precious stone. It was a valuable jewel.  A short time later, the monk met a traveler, who said he was hungry and asked the monk if he would share some of his provisions. When the monk opened his bag, the traveler saw the precious stone and, on an impulse, asked the monk if he could have it. Amazingly, the monk gave the traveler the stone. The traveler departed quickly, overjoyed with his new possession. However, a few days later he came back searching for the monk. He returned the stone to the monk and he made this request: “Please give me something more valuable, more precious than the stone. Please give me that which enabled you to give me this precious stone.” James W. Moore, Some Things Are to Good Not to Be True, p 101.

Care, concern, and compassion for others is a quality that most of us could use a little more of. Jesus taught his disciples the importance of compassion. In Matthew 15:32 we read, “Jesus called his disciples to Him and said, “I have compassion for these people who have already been with me three days and have nothing to eat. I do not want to send them away hungry, or they may collapse on the way.” 

Just earlier the disciples had urged Jesus to get rid of a woman who was begging that He heal her demon possessed daughter. “Send her away for she keeps crying out after us,” the disciple’s urged Jesus. But Jesus had time for her, just as he had time for anyone who crossed his path with a need.

Jesus was a man whose heart was always "moved with compassion" (Matthew 9:36; 14:14; 20:32. The Greek word for compassion in each of  these verses means “to suffer with,” which implies he cared so much for people in need that it physically affected him. That is why when 4,000 people were camped out on His mountain doorstep, He couldn’t just send them away. They had a need, and He was willing to take the time to meet it.

Often, we avoid becoming involved with people because we know  that we will be inconvenienced by having to address their needs. It is easier to be like those disciples and say, “Send her/him away,” “I don’t have the time,” “I don’t have the money,” “I don’t have the ability,” “ I don’t have the energy,”  “I have "been there, done that," and I suspect you have, too. But Jesus reminds us that we need to be looking for opportunities to be His hands and feet, and to minister compassionately with the heart of His love. 

An unknown author has observed, “Some of our tears should be like Christ’s tears-for other people’s troubles. He never wept for Himself. Let us shed no more tears for ourselves until our sympathy with other people has touched us and made us weep.”

Let us pray today that we don’t run from opportunities to minister compassion, but like Jesus let us be on the lookout for ways to offer it. When you do, you will make three people glad: yourself, the recipient, and most important of all, your friend Jesus.

Have a great day.

Yours in faith and friendship.

Tom

Leadership Thought: How Do I Discover My Spiritual Gift(s)?

Dear Friends,

As we continue our look into spiritual gifts, let me recap what we have thus far discovered. Each believer is given a spiritual gift(s) at the time of his or her conversion. They are sovereignly given, not because of anything we have done to deserve them, but simply because God loves us, and it is out of the abundance of His love that He provides them for us. They are not meant to be stored but to be shared. They are given for service, to equip each  individual believer to build up the body of Christ. They are given “ for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ (Eph. 4:12).  

As believers we will be held accountable for the use of our gift(s)  when we stand before God at the Bema seat of judgment. “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad” ( 1 Cor. 5:10). 

We discovered that spiritual gifts are irrevocable, and while they can go unused or even abused, we can’t lose them.

Having said this, the question becomes how do we discover them. Let me suggest eight  things you can do to discover your spiritual gift(s)

1. Make prayer and the subject of  spiritual gifts a matter of informed study. Examine the passages which addressing the use of spiritual gifts in the Bible. Go on the Internet and type in “spiritual gifts,” and you will find a multitude of verses and articles covering this subject. Pray that God would reveal to you what spiritual gift(s) you might possess.

2. Look within and ask yourself what are my  personal interests and abilities? Reflect on  what you like to do and what you do well, and experiment in different situations where your interests and abilities intersect with the gift you are using.

3. Go to the Internet and click on one of the many different spiritual gift assessments available to get an idea of what your spiritual gift(s) may be. There are many variations of this questionnaire, and the one we use in our church is the Modified Houts Spiritual Inventory.

4. Be open and don’t zero in on only one gift to the exclusion of others. Try and put yourself in situations where you can experiment with any of the gifts that  might be appropriate for the task you are performing.

5. Look for feedback and affirmation from others when you are using a particular gift. Sometimes others will provide you the best insights into whether you are gifted in a particular area. "I love the way you are always helping others, (gift of helps or service), or you seem to have an incredible ability in to communicate God's truth (gift of teaching) are examples of the kind of feedback that might be helpful.

6. Ask yourself if I enjoy and find fulfillment in exercising the spiritual gift I am exercising. It wouldn't make sense for God to give us a gift(s) that we didn’t enjoy exercising.

7. Ask yourself, "Am I getting better performing actions where my gift is being utilized?

8. Be sensible. Don’t  force yourself  into a particular gift if it does not appear to be given to you. Many of us would love to be preachers, but the validation of that gift may be readily  revealed in the pews by the number of people you have put to sleep.

I hope this information on spiritual gifts has been helpful and that you will take a moment to let me know anything you have discovered about the use of your gifts. 

In closing I  challenge you with the words Paul wrote to Timothy: Stir up the gift of God within you”(2 Timothy 1:6).

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Don't Neglect the Spiritual Gift within You.

Dear Friends,

Yesterday we looked at the topic of spiritual gifts, and this morning I would like to continue our discussion.

We said yesterday that everyone possesses at least one spiritual gift. A spiritual gift or gifts are given at the time of your conversion. Each believer possesses them as 1 Peter 4:10 clearly points out (“to each is given”). You were not left out or short changed when they were given. You possess them, even though you may not recognize their presence.

I often will share with my congregation that when I step into the pulpit on Sunday morning  I see before me  beautifully gift-wrapped packages placed in the pews.  Each package  has a tag on it that says, “Given by the Holy Spirit in love for ministry.” Some of the gift-wrapped packages have been ripped open and the gift(s) inside are on display for all to see. Sadly, however, many of those boxes remain unwrapped, and the gift(s) within have yet to be discovered.

If all those gift-wrapped packages were opened and those wonderful spirit given gifts were discerned, developed and deployed, the church would be a mighty army that the world could never stop.

Someone wrote, “Gifts are meant to be employed not enjoyed, shared not shelved, used not abused." Christian you have a gift(s) and you are cheating yourself and your church if they remain undiscovered and unemployed.

For further study I suggest you go to the following passages: 1 Peter 4:10; Eph 4:7,10-11; 1 Cor 12:7-10; and Romans 12:6-8.

Paul says in 1 Corinthians 12:1, “ Now dear brothers and sisters, regarding your question about the special abilities (spiritual gifts), I don’t want you to misunderstand  (NLB).  Some translations replace “misunderstand" with the words “ignorant” or “unaware.”

We are commanded to employ those gifts. If you are not doing so, you are being disobedient to the One who provided you your gift(s). And furthermore, you are cheating your brothers and sisters who might benefit from the use of those gift(s).

Your gift(s) are given at the time of your conversion. They are sovereignly given. We don’t choose them anymore than we can choose the color of our eyes; they’re divinely given at the time of  your new birth. Additional gifts may also be given subsequent to conversion as God chooses. It is important to understand that gifts are never achieved, but simply received, for we have nothing to do with the gifts we possess).  They are given according to God’s grace, and that is why they are sometimes referred to as "grace gifts."

Scholars vary regarding to the number of gifts available. Some list as few as 9 (explicit gifts),  while others see as many as 27, including some  implicitly stated gifts like missionary, hospitality and prayer gifts. Also Included in that list is the gift of martyrdom, leading one writer to facetiously write that this is the only gift that can be used just once. The point is that while scholars may argue the number, they don’t dispute their existence.

Gifts cannot be lost for once given they become your permanent possession, for as Romans 11:29 states, “the gifts and calling of God are irrevocable.” God does not change His mind. Sadly, your gift(s) can be ignored and neglected, but they can never  be lost.

Tomorrow we will close our discussion on spiritual gifts by discussing the various ways you can discover the gift(s) you have been given.”

Paul exhorts Timothy, “Don’t neglect the spiritual gift within you,” (1 Timothy 4:14), and I hope you won't either.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Who Says I Don't Have Any Spiritual Gifts?

Dear Friends,

Yesterday in our new members class, we addressed the topic of spiritual gifts. Those in the class had previously been asked to take  a spiritual gifts questionnaire designed to help assist them in discovering their  spiritual gift(s). It is an always an interesting time when participants gather and share their results. Many are surprised by what they have discovered about themselves as often the questionnaire reveals potential areas of giftedness, they had never imagined they possessed.

For the next few days, I would like to explore the nature of spiritual gifts, and hopes of helping us all  gain a clearer understanding of  why they are so critical for the success of the church, and the spiritual development of the believer.

Just what is a spiritual gift. It has been described as  "The ability to function effectively and significantly in a particular service as a member of Christ’s body, the church, that when exercised leads to the building up of the body." David Jeremiah, a pastor and author states, “No church be what God intended it to be, Jesus wants it to be, or the Holy Spirit gifted it to be without a knowledge of spiritual gifts."

As a pastor I am always stressing the point that members need to recognize they are meant to be contributors not consumers. God means for them to be engaged participants in the work of the kingdom. The true  measure of ministry should  never be determined by  bodies, budgets, or buildings. The most accurate measurement of the success of  any church’s ministry is how many members have discovered, developed and deployed their spiritual gift(s).

Too often the church has been viewed as a football game where there are 50,000 wildly cheering fans in the stands in desperate need of exercise with 22 players on the field in desperate need of rest.

Every Sunday morning the church should become  a meeting of the ministerial association where everyone sitting in the pews has come prepared to learn, grow, and be equipped  to use their gifts to make a difference in the  King's kingdom.

D. L Moody was right when he said, "I would rather put a thousand men to work than to do the work of a thousand men. "One is always too small a number to achieve greatness," says John Maxwell.

Sometimes we as pastors grow frustrated when we see believers sitting on the sidelines without any idea of the contribution they could make, simply because they are unaware of the abilities they possess.

Peter reminds us that "each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms” (1 Peter 4:10 KJV).

The ESV expresses it this way: “As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace.”

For the church to be an effective force in the world, its members need to be equipped, and engaged in service, and one of the most critical parts of the engagement process is learning and applying your spiritual gift(s). We will talk more about this tomorrow, as we learn how we discover those spiritual gift(s).

Yours in faith and friendship,

Pastor Tom

Leadership Thought: Content or Covetous?

Dear Friend,

We have heard that “the grass is always greener on the other side of the street,” and that is often true. But as someone once remarked, "so also is the water bill.” You and I have an awful habit of comparing ourselves and what we have with those who have more.  As a result, we often miss the best God has for us because we fail to appreciate the blessings we already have.

The Apostle Paul provides us a model for the contented life. He tells us no matter what the situation, “I have learned the secret of contentment” (Philippians 4:12). No matter what my circumstances, whether I live under a bridge or in a penthouse, whether I am rich or poor I have learned to be content because contentment comes from within and not from without.

Unfortunately, in today’s world when we are bombarded by ads of every variety that are always promising comfort and convenience, happiness and contentment, we are tempted to think we will also find that happiness in some product or some service. But these things seldom bring happiness or contentment. Just ask some of the lottery winners whose newfound wealth has brought them nothing but misery and discontentment. 

We are too much like the guy described in the following bit of doggerel:

“As a rule, mans a fool

When it cool, he wants it hot.

And when it’s hot, he wants it cool.

Always wanting what is not.”

Happiness comes from within and not without. If there is a vacuum within your heart, Satan will steal in and convince you that happiness is found in a credit card. However, like cotton candy, our purchases may bring temporary pleasure, but soon after the purchase we want something newer and bigger, which almost always means more money. As someone said, “greed has a growling stomach.”

Paul tells us in Philippians 4:10, “My God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.”.

Christ will meet all of our needs, but never all our greed. God wants the best for us, but often we miss that best because we fail to recognize the blessings we already possess.

An ancient Persian legend tells of a wealthy man by the name of Al Haffed, who owned a large farm. One evening a visitor related to him tales of fabulous amounts of diamonds that could be found in other parts of the world, and of the great riches they could bring him. The vision of all this wealth made him feel poor by comparison. So instead of caring for his own prosperous farm, he sold it and went out to find these treasures. But the search proved to be fruitless. Finally, penniless and in despair, he committed suicide by jumping into the sea.

Meanwhile, the man who had purchased his farm noticed one day the glint of an unusual stone in a shallow stream on the property. He reached into the water and, to his amazement, he pulled out a huge diamond. Later when working in his garden, he uncovered many more valuable gems. Poor Al Haffed had spent his life traveling to distant lands seeking jewels, when on the farm he had left behind were all the precious stones his heart could have ever desired.

Security can never be found in a safe deposit box. Jesus has taught us that a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions (Luke 12:15), and He advised his disciples “to lay up treasures for themselves in heaven rather than on earth” (Mt. 6:19f).

Let us never forget that contentment never comes from the accumulation of things, but from the assurance that “God will never leave us or forsake us”, and that’s a promise we can count on.

Have a wonderful weekend

Yours in faith and friendship,

Pastor Tom

Thursday, October 22, 2020

 

Leadership Thought: A Quick End to the Radical Polarization in the U.S. as Shared by a Pastoral Colleague, "The Art of Neighboring?"

Dear Friend,

"Looking for an answer to entrenched polarization?  Look at what is happening to overcome hatred and create peace across Ethiopia." So begins the words of a good  friend and colleague who served on staff with me in the 80's when I was pastoring in Greenville, Pa. After several pastorates, his last in Visalia, Ca, Rich Hansen and his wife Marilyn traveled across the ocean to serve on the mission field in Ethiopia, where Rich would teach in a seminary in Addis Ababa where he helped train Ethiopian pastors. Presently he and his wife are living in Annapolis Maryland where he is a life coach for pastors.

In his weekly newsletter he shares an interview with Andrew DeCort, whom he met while teaching at the Seminary. Andrew leads the "Neighbor-Love Movement" in Ethiopia. It is a movement that had chosen  to  not only study the Sermon on the Mount, but to live out its message in specific and practical ways. They are practicing “the greatest message ever preached” in real time in a country divided by hatred where Moslems and Christians continue to wage war, and where families are being torn apart by tribal, religious, and political hatred. I think the message they share is ripe for hearing in our politically and racially charged environment.

The Sermon on the Mount was not only meant to be preached but to be practiced. Jesus expects us to "actually, concretely,  and unequivocally love our enemies," and in Ethiopia there are those who are taking seriously these words by practicing what is called  "Neighboring Love." The foundation of this ministry  began when a few people took to heart the words of Jesus who told us we are to love our enemies, and in doing so they are  leaving behind them the footprints to their faith as they step into the middle of the ethnic, social and political conflicts amidst their society. This year the "Art of Neighboring" will be shared in all 45 universities across the country, and already the stories of the radical relational transformation that have resulted from this ministry are amazing to behold.

When I listened to the interview with one of the founders of the  "Neighbor Love Movement" which you can access by clicking on to the link below, I was amazed at the biblical simplicity of their message which embraces loving others with every part of our body.

1. I will use my eyes literally  see you as my neighbor

2. I will open my ears to hear and listen to  your hurt, and I will love and respect you even when we disagree.

3. I will use my mouth to speak truth and show respect and to ask forgiveness when I have wronged you.

4. I will use my hands  to help you, not harm you

5. I will use my feet to move outside my own circle and walk with people who are different from me, even those who are my enemies. And I will work to get closer to them to try and make them my friends.

6. I will use my heart and make it a place where I can  embrace your joy and your pain and not revert to envy, cursing or revenge.

7. I will use my mind and brain to live a unified life and hold together unified values of lifestyle and belief and practices without  ever saying I am a follower of Jesus while choosing to hate my enemy.

Many of us wore WWJD, 'What Would Jesus Do" wristbands. That was an easy thing for us to do, and hopefully it made, and still makes a difference, in how we live out our faith. Wearing a wrist band can certainly be a good reminder of how we are to walk in Christ's footsteps, but the Art of Neighboring takes this challenge to a new and higher level. This is not Christianity 101. It is for only who are seeking  an advanced degree in discipleship.

I close with the words of our brother James who writes: "But be doers of the word, and not merely hearers who deceive themselves." (James 1:22),  Enough said. I hope you will click on and listen to the link below.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Wednesday, October 21, 2020

Leadership Thought:  How God Uses Adversity to Shape Us for Greater Things.

Dear Friends,

We were studying adversity in a recent meeting with the men who are a part of U-Turn for Christ, an addiction ministry that we host each week at New Monmouth. I asked those present,  “How has adversity shaped your life”? 

And one by one each of them began revealing the pain and problems they had experienced as they dealt with their drug or alcohol addiction. They all shared different stories, but they all agreed on one thing: They were glad for the adversity they experienced as they battled their addiction.

Why would they say that? Because it was adversity that led them into a recovery ministry that had taught them about God. Despite their painful pasts, they were all grateful  for their pasts, for they could now see how that adversity had now brought them  face to face with Jesus.

Someone was right on when they said, “What we call adversity, God calls opportunity.”  How often God uses adversity to break the bonds of some particular sin that enslaves us.

Together we examined James 1:2-4 where James reminds us that we are to “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

These brothers in their newfound faith could now see how their painful pasts had now produced a new and promising future. They now could fully understand God’s promise in Romans 8:28 that “In everything, God works together for good to those who love God and are called according to his purpose.”

I enjoy reading Allister Begg’s daily devotions, and in one of his recent messages he writes,  "Rest assured, if you are a child of God, you will be no stranger to the rod. Sooner or later every bar of gold must pass through the fire. Fear not, but rather rejoice that such fruitful times are in store for you for in them you will be weaned from earth and made meet for heaven,  you will be delivered from clinging to the present and made to long for those eternal things that are so soon to be revealed to you."

Have a great day today and remember that “We are always in the forge, or on the anvil; but by trials God is shaping us for higher things.”

Yours in faith and friendship.

Tom

Leadership Thought: So, You Think You Have Problems.

Dear Friends,

This is the devotional that never got sent. Early yesterday morning I had just finished writing it, but then before sending it I somehow lost it and in spite of using my very limited technological efforts I was never able to recover it. I hope there are some of you out there who can identify and relate to my predicament. In any event, I am hoping to recover some of yesterday’s thoughts to address a question that all of us have at one time or another faced- “Why is this happening to me?”

David, Israel’s future king, had just witnessed the ransacking of  Ziglag, the city where his family and the families of his fighting men were living. The city was completely plundered and everyone living in it was captured and taken away by the raiding Amalekites. Making matters worse, David's own men were ready to stone him, blaming him for the events which had just transpired while they were in the hills on the run from King Saul.

“David was greatly distressed, for the people spoke of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and for his daughters" (1 Samuel 30:6a).

Ever felt like the whole world had turned against you and you had no place to run? Maybe your household was under attack, your wife had become distant, your children had turned against you, and those who once were your friends had drifted away and now the enemy of discouragement, depression and despair was standing on your doorstep.

Where is my pastor? Where are my friends? Where are the people who once danced and celebrated my mighty victories and who sang, “ Saul has killed a thousand enemies; David has killed ten thousand.”

When David had no place to look,  but up, he realized he was not alone, but that God was right there with him. We read ….”But David encouraged himself in the Lord his God” (1 Samuel 30:6b).

While things around him looked grim, David was not about the planning of some pity party Instead he chose to “encourage himself in the Lord.” In Psalm 42:5,  we read the shape and form that encouragement took as he faced those “rock ready” enemies who once were his friends.

He cries  out, “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God. For I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”

David knows that while the world may be crumbling all around him and everyone has deserted him, he can look up to the One who was the source of his salvation and ask himself, “Why are you feeling this way?” He knows his hope is in God and because of that he will choose to  praise him and thank him and sing and talk to Him as he remembers and reflects upon all the great things God has done for Him.

When we go through our tough times, why not remember what David did to encourage himself and then turn to Isaiah 41:10 and  read,  “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." That’s a verse we should never forget."

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: What Would It Be Like for Fox and CNN to Hold Hands?

Dear Friends,

In this toxic political world where it has not become uncommon to lose friends because of one’s political views, I thought how important it is for us to honor and respect one another. 

Regardless of whatever our differences of opinion might be, it is critical that we honor and show respect to one another. The Apostle Paul writes in Romans that we are to “Love each other with genuine affection and take delight in honoring (respecting) each other” (Romans 12:10, Living Bible).

Let's be careful to treat everyone with the same respect and honor, regardless of who they are or what their views might be. Each one of us must be vigilant in making sure that we are not picking and choosing the recipients of our honor based on their political views. As Christians we are called to honor all people because they have been fashioned in God’s image,  and because He loves them just as much as He loves you and me. It doesn’t mean that we must always agree with those with whom we differ, or that loving people who think differently from us will be naturally easy. No, loving those with whom we disagree can be one of hardest things we are called to do, but it is one of the clearest indicators of the maturity of the faith we proclaim.

Someone said, “Respect is love in plain clothes.” It doesn’t masquerade its motives. It is what Paul says it should be in 1 Corinthians 13: "sincere and genuine, and without pretense."

A  number of years ago I attached a three by five card to my computer on which I wrote the following: “A great man shows his greatness by the way he treats the little man.” The quote was supposedly attributed to Thomas Carlisle.

Whether we consider someone little or big, rich or poor, like us or different from us, we need to honor and respect them even when we might disagree with them. If Fox News and CNN would learn to do this, I believe there might be a lot less rancor and division within our nation.

Today let’s make a conscious effort to look up to everyone and show them honor and respect.  Let’s treat people as if they are important to us because they are important to God.

If someone were to ask me to summarize what I have written, I would do so by simply and succinctly quoting the words of a man who left us very clear instructions on how to accomplish the challenge of honoring one another.  It is fashioned from just 17 words: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another as I have loved you” (John 13:34). In this politically charged world, these words may be a challenge to obey, but with God’s help and a little self-discipline, I believe we all can do it. And one of first ways we can begin to accomplish this is by erasing the “red” or “blue”  demarcation line that so often separates our friendships and recognizing that we are called to love each regardless of…yes, let’s be spiritual  bi partisan believers.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. On a personal note I might add, of all the people that needed to hear this message, I confess it is me!

Leadership Thought: Closing the Drawers of My Leadership File Cabinet with Some Thoughts I Hope Will Make a Difference in Your Life.

Dear Friends,

As the week comes to an end, I thought I would close out this week’s "Leadership Thoughts" by leaving you will some of my favorite leadership quotes.  They are not only meant to be shared and enjoyed, but to be lived and applied and to ultimately make a difference in how you live your life. I trust that you will find one or two of them that are worth fixing to your bathroom mirror as an ever-present reminder of how to live your life as a leader and as a Christ follower. Enjoy:

“The best way to inspire change is to be it.”

“He who thinks he is leading when no one else is following, is only taking a walk.” Chinese Proverb

“Live in such a way that you wouldn’t be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.” Will Rogers

“Character consists of what you do on the third and fourth tries.” James Michener

“A clear conscience never fears mid night knocking.” Chinese Proverb

“If you want to travel fast, go alone; if you want to travel far, take someone with you.”

“Reflection turns experience into insight.”

“The only one not rowing has time to rock the boat.”

“To ignore evil is to be a partner to it”. Martin Luther King.

“In unjust situations, when you remain neutral, you join the side of the oppressors. If an elephant’s foot is on the tail of a mouse, and you claim neutrality, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.” Desmond Tuto

“Touch a person’s heart before you ask him for his hand.”

“Nothing improves a person’s hearing like a little praise.”

After two years following a fall that impacted Zig Ziglar’s life, he wrote this: “I have good days and other days. You know there are no bad days. After all some people didn’t wake up today, so compared to them, I’m having a better-than-good day!”

“The question to be asked at the end of an educational step is not what has the student learned but what has the student become.”

“The only thing that walks back from the grave and refuses to be buried is the character of a man.”

“Act the way you’d like to be and soon you will be the way you act.”

"It is easier to act your way into a new set or feelings than to feel your way into a new set of actions."

Long ago I memorized the poem, "The Touch of the Masters Hand", one of my favorite poems. It’s too long to include, but google it, and maybe you too will memorize it. It's the story of life.

“Growth determines who you are, and who you are determines who you will become, and who you will become determines who you will attract.”

“Hell begins on the day when God grants us a clear vision of all that we might have achieved, of all the gifts we wasted, of all that we might have done that we did not do.” Gian Carlo Menotti

“The secret of success is to go through life as a man who never gets used up.” Albert Schweitzer

“When you place a premium on growth, you take whatever talent you have and you increase it.”

I hope I have given you some thoughtful leadership inspiration that will impact your life each and every day.

However, the greatest leadership thought I can leave with you is this: God loves you; He died for you, and He gifted you with abundant and eternal life.” The question each one of us must daily ask of ourselves is “What will I do to show my gratitude and appreciation for this gift?”

Have a wonderful weekend.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Thursday, October 15, 2020

Leadership Thought: A Great Lesson from a Basketball Player I Coached and More Wisdom from the Word and an Old Wooden File Cabinet.

Dear Friends,

Akeem Morissaint was his name, and I will never forget him. He was five feet five inches, and at the most he weighed 150 pounds. He possessed a smile that lit up the room, and he embodied the kind of determination that would make him a success at whatever he chose to do. The first time he entered our school’s gym in Fort Lauderdale, Fl. I could tell there was something special about him. His parents fled from Haiti during one of their many revolutions, and he showed up on Calvary Christian Academy’s doorstep a few weeks after school started, the beneficiary of some money that a family friend provided to pay for his schooling.

His sophomore year he came out for basketball, and immediately I knew he would be a star because he had a work ethic like no other player I had ever coached, He lived 20 miles from school, and every day he took the train, and each morning I would pick him up at 7:00 at the Cypress Ave. train station, and together we would drive to the gym where I would work with him. He would practice for an hour until the bell for his first class rang. I well remember some of those early morning workouts. Who could forget a player making 25 three pointers in a row or 79 straight foul shots. He played three years for me, and as a senior he made first team all Broward County, joining the likes of three other exceptional players who went on to start at three of the top division 1 basketball schools in the country.  

Akeem’s lack of size kept him being recruited by major D-1 schools, but his talent and determination didn’t preclude him from getting a scholarship to Northwest Missouri State, a small  school where he starred for several years before an injury ended his playing days.

It has been well said that “Leadership is influence, and influence is what Akeem possessed. Everyone looked up to this diminutive athlete who proved that size doesn't matter and that if you want something bad enough, you can achieve it regardless of the limitations you might encounter. As team captain, Akeem led as much by example as he did by his ability. His greatest leadership quality was his determination to be an all-star in spite of his limited size.

One of a leader’s greatest assets is the kind determination Akeem possessed, a relentless inner drive that never allows one to quit until the goal is achieved.

I used to constantly remind my players of the word "Dimitt", a word that can’t be found in any dictionary. It is simply an acronym for "Determination is more important than talent." The word "Dimitt" provides a constant reminder to anyone that if you want to be successful in any walk of life, you must possess the quality of determination. And that thought leads me once again to that beautiful office file cabinet where stored away are a couple of quotes that I would leave with you.

“Once you learn to quit, it becomes a habit.” Vince Lombardi

“Habit is the daily battleground  on which character is formed.”

“The secret of success is to start from scratch and keep scratching.”

“She didn’t know it couldn’t be done, but she went ahead and did it anyways.” Bridget McDonald

Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and Determination alone are omnipotent.” President Calvin Coolidge

But perhaps the greatest quotes I could leave with you come from the Word of God where we are exhorted "...To not grow weary in doing good for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up” (Gal 6:9), and “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).

Why not post those verses on your mirror, and who knows what you might achieve? You may not become an all-star on the basketball floor like Akeem, but I am sure you will be an all-star in the Kingdom of God, and what could be a greater reward than that?

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Wednesday, October 14, 2020

Leadership Thought: When Growth Ends, Death Begins-Some More Wisdom from That Old Wooden File Cabinet.

Dear Friends,

I love being around people who desire to grow, who have an insatiable thirst for learning and who are always looking for new challenges to stretch them. I want to be like the guy who signs his letters, “Yours at 89 and still growing.”

Leaders are learners; they never stop growing, and regardless of their age they are never content to remain where they are, but instead they are always looking for new opportunities to grow and improve.

The great cellist  Pablo Casals was 81 when he was asked, "Why do you continued to practice four and five hours a day," and he replied, “Because I think I am still improving."

I would ask you, are you still improving?  Whether you be young and just out of school, or older, or retired or somewhere in between, I wonder if you are still growing, still improving, still finding challenges that stretch you and take you outside your comfort zone?  

Spiritually speaking we should never be the same today as we were yesterday, and we should never be tomorrow what we are today.

You may have heard it said, “When you’re green you’re growing, but when you’re ripe, you rot." I want to be counted among those who are green and growing. I want to be known as one who is constantly maturing and moving forward, especially in my spiritual life.

The Apostle Paul exhorts his spiritual son Timothy, “To take pains with these things, be absorbed in them, so that your progress may be evident to all” (1 Timothy 4:15). Paul wanted to see signs of spiritual growth in Timothy’s life.

In the Bible the word “progress” describes a pioneer, one who is advancing into new territory. Spiritually speaking we should all be spiritual pioneers, not just settlers. Pioneers, unlike settlers, look forward to adventure. They are always advancing. They are looking for the next challenge. They are never content to remain where they have always been.

I believe God wants us to take off, to risk, to get out of our comfort zone. He doesn’t want us to remain spiritual settlers, cozy and complacent as we live in our own little comfort zones.

I don’t want to be a spiritual settler, and I hope the same is true for you, No I want you to grow, risk, develop and mature. Peter encourages us “To grow up in our salvation." How sad it is to see people, who were born, who died at 40 and were buried at 75.

Once again let me return to that old office  file cabinet where I have stored  a lot of  other people’s wisdom and  share  some thoughts  that I hope might challenge you to  adopt a pioneering spirit when it comes to your own personal growth.

“Growth determines who you are, and who you are determines who you will become, and who you will become determines who you will attract.”

 “I consider it a wasted day when I have not learned something new or peered into the mystery of God’s grace and wisdom.” William Barclay, New Testament commentator.

Too many are embalmed by the truth rather than excited by it." Tony Campolo

You either will grow up or grow old. The choice is yours.

 “When someone misses an opportunity for growth and improvement, he may feel regret. If he goes long enough without growing, he begins to feel he has had an unused life. And that is not unlike and early death.”

 “To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the only end of life.” Robert Lewis Stevenson

 “Growth unlike children is not automatic. Too many people start out at the bottom and sort of like it there.” Tennessee Ernie Ford,

 “Hell begins the day when God grants us a clear vision of all that we might have achieved, of all the gifts we wasted, and of all that we might have done that we did not do.” Gian Carlo Menotti.

As I close, let me remind you that “today’s peacock becomes tomorrow’s feather duster.” I'm not content to be relic of history, some old forgotten feather duster, but I want to make history, and I hope you do too. You can if you never stop growing.

 

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Tuesday, October 13, 2020

 

Leadership Thought: More Words of Wisdom from That Beautiful Office Wooden File Cabinet.

Dear Friends.

Yesterday I was at my daughter’s home celebrating the birthday of my youngest daughter. During the conversation I asked my son in law, how his work was going. He responded in one word, “ Terrible.” Now Chris  is an excellent salesperson who has done very well selling large telephone systems to companies all over the northeast, so I suggested that I was sure the pandemic has something to do with his sales. “No,” he said. “My sales are up 30 %, but the head of the company is impossible to work for. He then went on to relate how unhappy he and so many others in the company were because of the critical environment in which they worked.

I thought there is a boss who could benefit from a class on encouragement, and so continuing  my “Leadership Thoughts” from yesterday on the subject of encouragement, let me offer a few more  thoughts I’ve gathered from others and filed away in my treasury storehouse-that old brown file cabinet.

As a coach, I am always reminded of encouragement’s importance:

Encourage while the sweat is still on their brow.

Whisper criticism; shout praise.

Praise in public, criticize in private.

Be on the lookout to catch people doing something good and then affirm them.

And one of my favorites, A pat on the back is only a few vertebrae removed from a kick in the pants, but oh what a difference those inches can make.

Believing in people before they prove themselves, is the key to motivating people to reach their potential.

Treat people as the most important people in the world and you will communicate that they are a somebody to you.

And finally, don’t be a 'tombstone encourager.' Don’t wait until there are flowers on his/her grave before you speak those encouraging words your friend would have loved to have heard.

It is true that the high spots in most of our lives have come from times when someone has encouraged us. When I was athletic director at Calvary Christian Academy in Fort Lauderdale, one of our physical education teachers always carried with him a plastic bottle of honey. Whenever he would catch one of his students doing or saying something worth commending- a kind word or action- he would immediately stop everything and draw attention to the individual and the specific act. He would then squeeze a little honey on the fingers of the recipient and quote one of my favorite encouragement bible verses, “Kind words are like a honeycomb; sweet to the soul and healing to the bones” (Prov. 16:24).

I wish my son in law’s boss knew how sweet and refreshing kind words could be, and what a difference they could make in one’s attitude towards work.

I don’t remember who wrote these words, but they couldn’t be any truer. “Flatter me and I may not believe you, criticize me and I may not like you, ignore me and I may never forgive you, but encourage me, and I will never forget you.”

A word to my friend and son in law, Chris-why not leave those words hanging on your boss’s door, unnamed of course!

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Monday, October 12, 2020

Leadership Thought: Words of Wisdom from a Beautiful Wooden Office File Cabinet.

Dear Friends,

Over the past forty years, I have been in the habit of collecting stories, quotes, and relevant articles that I would then  paste on 3/5 cards for future use in  messages that I might share. I suspect I have well over 20,000 of these file cards tucked away in a large wooden file cabinet in my office. This 4 by 4 wooden treasure case was crafted  by former woodworker friend who was a member of a church I served in the 80’s while pastoring In Greenville, Pa. I treasure this beautiful wooden file cabinet and the wisdom hidden within, and so for the next few days, I thought I would explore and share some of the contents found within those wooden drawers.

Those who know me recognize my love for leadership, and since the title of my daily e-mails is “Leadership Thoughts” I reckoned what could be more appropriate than to start off with some “leadership thoughts."

One of the key qualities of successful leaders is their  ability to fashion strong relationships, so let me share a few bullet points that you might keep in mind in connecting with others. These points are not original, and I take no credit for any of them, except that I once thought them important enough to save and store, while also trying hard to  apply them throughout my lifetime in ministry. Most of them are self-evident and need little explanation.

“Put a 10 on the forehead of everyone you meet.”

Envision a sign hanging around the neck of everyone you meet that reads, ”Please help me feel important.” Mary Kay

When visiting with someone, try to leave them with a sincere (no phony baloney) compliment. You might ask, "do you know what I like about you,” and  then take a moment to point out some affirming comment about them:  smile, energy, enthusiasm etc.

Don’t let anyone leave you without feeling better or happier.

If you help enough people get what they want, they will help you get what you want.

You can’t help someone feel special if deep  down in your heart you feel like they are a nobody.

“Kind words are short and easy to speak but their echoes are endless.” Mother Teresa

“Always look for ways to add value to people.” John Maxwell

Don’t push people down, lift them up. John Maxwell shared this thought at a leadership conference by using a powerful illustration. He demonstrated with his hands how pushing someone down involves yourself going down with them. However, in lifting others up, you not only raise them up but you are raised up as well. I have never forgotten that wonderful visual image.

"MBWA" Management By Walking around. Take time to walk around your office or place of employment always looking for opportunities to engage others and to speak some word of encouragement into their lives

And finally, three of the most important biblical  "relationship reminders" I know and which were important enough for  me to commit to memory:

“A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver” (Prov. 25:11).

“Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones” (Prov. 16:24).

“Don’t let any unwholesome words come out of your mouth,  but only that which is helpful for building others up according to their needs” (Eph.4:29).

Well, hopefully these few thoughts will help you get started on the road to building even stronger relationships with friends, acquaintances, strangers, and yes, even those within your own family.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom