Leadership Thought: Are Pastors Making Status Statements with Their Sartorial Splendor?

Dear Friends,

 The other day l received an e-mail article from a good  friend. The headline intrigued me: “Preachers and their $5,000 sneakers: Why one man started an Instagram account showing churches’ wealth.”

 The article by Ben Kirby documents well known pastors whose names many would recognize (I choose not to mention them, but should you be interested, you can go to the link at the end of this message for the article). The story spoke of pastors wearing new designer suits in the $ 2,000’s, sporting $5,000 sneakers,  and $ 2,ooo crocodile belts.

The writer simply asks, “How much is too much? Is it okay to get rich off of preaching about Jesus? Is it okay to be making twice as much as the medium income of your congregation?  Kirby  highlights a nationwide trend of pastors wearing oversized glasses, tight jeans and pricey kicks, who look  like they belonged at your local craft cocktail watering hole instead of church.”

As one who does much of his clothes shopping at the Calico Cat and Monarch thrift stores, and who gladly welcomes his family’s hand me downs,  not because I am cheap, but because I never met a bargain that I didn’t like,  I was surprised by the lengths some well-known pastors would go to provide  statements of their status.

My e-mail friend who sent me the article reminded me of the words of well-known evangelical speaker Tony Campolo who happened to be speaking at a church I was pastoring. I was excited to have him share the pulpit after having heard him at an outdoor Creation Festival in the early 90’s when his message on discipleship profoundly impacted my life.

I  quickly discovered that inviting Tony to speak was a dangerous proposition; it doesn’t come without risk as  Tony is as unbridled as can be and you take your chances for you can never be sure who he is going to challenge, and yes, even offend. Tony has never been known to mince words when talking about the cost of discipleship.

Midway through the message, Tony asked. “If Jesus had been given $40,000 and was living in Haiti, would he have spent it on the purchase of  a new BMW? It was a penetrating question, designed to make some people extremely uncomfortable, and I am sure it did. I still remember wincing and slinking down behind the pulpit hoping to hide my eyes from the icy stares from some of our wealthier church members.

My friend remembered the message and reminded me of it, and the fact that I even invited him back for a second time a few years later.  I e-mailed these words back to him:  “Unfortunately, it is so true that there are well respected pastors who are milking their flocks . . . Thanks for sending me the article and the reminder of Tony’s message. Don't you ever go out and buy a new Beemer or a Mercedes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, that is, unless you want to be the subject in my next Leadership Thought."

The writer of Proverbs reminds us “Trust in your money and down you go! Trust in God and flourish as a tree!” No, the Bible is not suggesting it is wrong to have and enjoy wealth, but only that one needs to be careful how you use it, for wrongly used, it will destroy you.

Pastor Rick Warren  writes in one of his recent  Pastors' Newsletters, “Money shows what you love most, (and) shows you what your trust most . . . There is a direct connection between maturity and money. There is a direct connection between God’s blessing in your life and what you do with your cash. Don’t miss the connection. How you handle money determines how much God can bless your life.”

The bible says, “If you have not been trustworthy in handling worldly wealth, who will trust you with true riches? And if you have not been trustworthy with someone else’s property, who will give you property of your own” (Luke 16 :11-12)?

I know I may have lost some friends among those of you who own and drive new and expensive cars but having been to Haiti several times on mission trips I don’t apologize for the challenge. It is easy to wear WWJD bracelets on our wrists; it’s another thing to be good stewards of worldly wealth.  

I don’t begrudge any one for the money they make or how they choose to spend it. However, let me provide one last suggestion: "Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the first fruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim with new wine” (Proverbs 3:9-10). 

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom  

 

Leadership Thought: Don’t Widen the Plate-It’s Still Only 17 Inches.

Dear Friend,

As I get ready to take the field to begin another year of high school umpiring, I was reminded of the following story which I had heard years ago and which I had assumed was apocryphal. However, I recently discovered that the author of the story was in fact a real college umpire who shared this memorable message in Nashville, Tennessee, during the first week of January 1996. It was shared with more than 4,000 baseball coaches who descended upon the Opryland Hotel for the 52nd annual ABCA convention. Here’s the story as it was told.

While waiting in line to register with the hotel staff, veteran coaches were rumbling about the lineup of speakers scheduled for the weekend. One name, in particular, kept resurfacing, always with the same sentiment — “John Scolinos is here? Oh man, worth every penny of my airfare.”

In 1996, Coach Scolinos was 78 years old and five years retired from a college coaching career that began in 1948.  As he shuffled to the stage to an impressive standing ovation, wearing dark polyester pants, a light blue shirt, and a string around his neck from which home plate hung — a full-sized, stark-white home plate … really?

After speaking for twenty-five minutes, not once mentioning the prop hanging around his neck, Coach Scolinos appeared to notice the snickering among some of the coaches. Even those who knew Coach Scolinos had to wonder exactly where he was going with this, or if he had simply forgotten about home plate since he’d gotten on stage.

Then, finally …

“You’re probably all wondering why I’m wearing home plate around my neck. Or maybe you think I escaped from Camarillo State Hospital,” he said, his voice growing irascible. I laughed along with the others, acknowledging the possibility. “No,” he continued, “I may be old, but I’m not crazy. The reason I stand before you today is to share with you what I’ve learned in my life, what I’ve learned about home plate in my 78 years.”

Several hands went up when Scolinos asked how many Little League coaches were in the room. “Do you know how wide home plate is in Little League?” After a pause, someone offered, “17 inches,” more question than answer.

“That’s right,” he said. “How about in Babe Ruth? Any Babe Ruth coaches in the house?”

Another long pause.

“17 inches?” came a guess from another reluctant coach.

“That’s right,” said Scolinos. “Now, how many high school coaches do we have in the room?” Hundreds of hands shot up, as the pattern began to appear. “How wide is home plate in high school baseball?”

“17 inches,” they said, sounding more confident.

“You’re right!” Scolinos barked. “And you college coaches, how wide is home plate in college?”

“17 inches!” said in unison.

“Any Minor League coaches here? How wide is home plate in pro ball?”

“17 inches!”

“RIGHT! And in the Major Leagues, how wide home plate is in the Major Leagues?”

“17 inches!”

“SEV-EN-TEEN INCHES!” he confirmed, his voice bellowing off the walls. “And what do they do with a Big-League pitcher who can’t throw the ball over seventeen inches?” Pause. “They send him to Pocatello!” he hollered, drawing raucous laughter.

“What they don’t do is this: they don’t say, ‘Ah, that’s okay, Jimmy. You can’t hit a seventeen-inch target? We’ll make it eighteen inches, or nineteen inches. We’ll make it twenty inches so you have a better chance of hitting it. If you can’t hit that, let us know so we can make it wider still, say twenty-five inches.’”

Pause.

“Coaches …”

Pause.

“… what do we do when our best player shows up late to practice? When our team rules forbid facial hair and a guy shows up unshaven? What if he gets caught drinking? Do we hold him accountable? Or do we change the rules to fit him, do we widen home plate?”

The chuckles gradually faded as four thousand coaches grew quiet, the fog lifting as the old coach’s message began to unfold. He turned the plate toward himself and, using a Sharpie, began to draw something. When he turned it toward the crowd, point up, a house was revealed, complete with a freshly drawn door and two windows. “This is the problem in our homes today. With our marriages, with the way we parent our kids. With our discipline. We don’t teach accountability to our kids, and there is no consequence for failing to meet standards. We widen the plate!”

Pause. Then, to the point at the top of the house he added a small American flag.

“This is the problem in our schools today. The quality of our education is going downhill fast and teachers have been stripped of the tools they need to be successful, and to educate and discipline our young people. We are allowing others to widen home plate! Where is that getting us?”

Silence. He replaced the flag with a Cross.

“And this is the problem in the Church, where powerful people in positions of authority have taken advantage of young children, only to have such an atrocity swept under the rug for years. Our church leaders are widening home plate!”

“If I am lucky,” Coach Scolinos concluded, “you will remember one thing from this old coach today. It is this: if we fail to hold ourselves to a higher standard, a standard of what we know to be right; if we fail to hold our spouses and our children to the same standards, if we are unwilling or unable to provide a consequence when they do not meet the standard; and if our schools and churches and our government fail to hold themselves accountable to those they serve, there is but one thing to look forward to …”

With that, he held home plate in front of his chest, turned it around, and revealed its dark black backside.

“… dark days ahead.”

Coach Scolinos died in 2009 at the age of 91, but not before touching the lives of hundreds of players and coaches.

His message was clear: “Coaches, keep your players — no matter how good they are — your own children, and most of all, keep yourself at seventeen inches.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. Thanks to  former high school friend and classmate, Dick Griffin, who reminded me of this memorable story. To learn more about the coach, google Coach John Scolinos

Leadership Thought: What I Learned About Work While Working for the County One Summer.

Dear Friends,

I learned a bad habit working for the county one summer. I learned how to be lazy. That is not a good trait to learn if you want to be successful. As I look  back on my high school days and my summer employment of doing road work for the county, I am embarrassed to think of what a poor witness I was. It was tempting to be a ‘shovel leaner,’ something that I learned from some of the ‘veterans’ who had worked with the county for years. I remember one time how I was one discouraged from working hard by some of those on the team, for as they said, “it made them look bad.” It was almost natural  to find ways to waste time at work for after all the financial benefits of working for the county were not all that great. Now I don’t want to indict anyone who works for the county, for I know not all workers are like the ones with whom I worked and thank goodness for that.

Fortunately, I had a father who taught me the value of a strong work ethic, so laziness never became a ‘chronic condition’ for me. And then when I came to know Christ, my work ethic was taken to a new level as I began reading through the Book of Proverbs.

One of the early ways, I was taught to study the Bible included reading a Proverb a day (there are 31 chapters-one for each day of most months). I quickly found that the Bible had a lot of negative things to say about laziness or being a slacker or a sluggard. These are definitely not good qualities for one seeking to be faithful in serving the Lord.

Listen to a few of the warnings from Proverbs I read: A lazy person hates to work: “The sluggard’s craving will be the death of him, because his hands refused to work” (21:25);_he loves sleep: “As a door turns on its hinges, so a sluggard turns on his bed” (26 : 14); he gives excuses: “The sluggard says, there is a lion in the road, a fierce lion roaming the streets” (26:13); he wastes time an energy: “He who is slothful in his work is a brother to him who was a great waster”(18: 9); he believes he is wise, but is a fool: “The sluggard is wiser in his own eyes than seven men who answered discreetly.” (26: 16).

There is no room in the life of a Christian for laziness. We have been saved to serve. Salvation is the root of our faith, but our work is the fruit of our faith. They go together. Do not forget to read verse 10 of Ephesians 2 which follow vs 8-9 (The verses where we learn salvation is not dependent on our works but on our faith). “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (v. 10).

In a Leaders Heart, a 365 Devotional) John Maxwell writes, “The sluggard makes only one commitment: to his leisure.  He will try any excuse to shy away from honest labor. Wise leaders know their time is limited. They know they have no way to retrieve misused or wasted time. Jesus stressed this when He said, “I must work the works of him who sent me while it is day; The night is coming when no one can work”(John 9: 4).  Leaders in the body of Christ must remain diligent in doing good and encouraging others to do likewise.” (March 17^th p. 80).

Let us not forget that “A lazy man/woman is a workshop for Satan.” (Arabian Proverb).

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S.  If you want to be accountable for being an active, industrious worker for Jesus, try signing Colossians 3:23-24 after your name.

Leadership Thought: The Letter I Received That Changed My Career Path.

Dear Friends,

Yesterday I came across a book on my bookshelves that had been given to me by a pastor named Sam Tatem. The title of the book was The Voice from the Cross by Andrew Blackwood, but what really caught my attention was what was written on the inside cover of the book.

On the first blank page of the book I read, “To my most devoted Christian friend whom I admire because of the grace of God. You are an exceedingly precious instrument of His Grace. To Tommy, Sam Tatem, March 7, 1967." It was 54 years since I had picked up the book, and I was surprised to read his note that I had long ago forgotten.

I never met my friend Sam, but we knew each other through the postman. The first letter I received from Sam was while I was a junior at Washington and Lee University where I headed  our Fellowship of Christian Athlete ministry. I had taken some of our F.C.A. members to visit a nearby  nursing home in the area, and a local newspaper had written up the story of our visit, and somehow the story got picked up by a paper a few hundred miles away in Newport News, Va. 

Sam was in his 70’s, and still pastoring a Baptist church when he saw the article and he took the time to write a note of appreciation,  encouraging me in our ministry.

For the next three years Sam and I corresponded through the mail, and each letter from Sam was always an expression of encouragement. We may have talked once or twice on the phone- I honestly don’t remember- but we always stayed in touch through the mail. Just before I was to graduate, Sam encouraged me to think about the ministry, and he encouraged me to consider enrolling in seminary. While I had considered seminary my senior year, I had already made plans to attend graduate school to secure a master’s in physical education, and I was now only two month from graduation.

To make a long story short, Sam continued to exhort me to explore seminary and shortly before graduation, I wrote and told him I had heeded his advice and would be starting seminary in the fall of 1965.

My letter writing friend was pleased to hear the news, and we continued to correspond while I was in Seminary. The book he sent me was one of the last pieces of mail I received from him because the Lord called him home shortly after the arrival of the book. While I never met Sam personally, our friendship grew as a result of our letter writing. Those three years’ worth of letters left an indelible spiritual imprint on my life.

I share this story because I believe it was Sam’s letters and prayers that God used to touch my heart and encouraged me to consider the ministry.

Don’t ever underestimate the power of the pen to make a difference in someone’s life. The written word is a powerful instrument to convey love and encouragement and through the years I have tried to make it an important part of my ministry.

Chuck Swindoll says it far better than I ever could in his devotional book, Day by Day. He writes “there is nothing quite like the charm and personal touch conveyed by a handwritten note. Since our penmanship, like our fingerprint, is altogether unique, each curve of the letter or stroke of the pen bears its own originality. There is personality and warmth and, yes, special effort too; for, after all, it’s much more efficient to click on the PC, bang out a few lines on the keyboard, and print it. But occasionally, it’s nice to think some still care enough to throw efficiency to the winds and look you right in the eye with the harmonious movement of their thoughts and fingers.”  He concludes his devotional thought with these words, “Let’s not allow the speed and efficiency of our high-tech society to crowd out the personal touch. The meaning and expression your fingers add to your words is worth all the effort, regardless of how poor your penmanship may be.”

So, let me encourage you to take some time this weekend to send a 'love letter' to someone whose life might be encouraged, even changed, like mine, because you took a pen in hand and let them know you cared.

Have a great weekend,

Tom

Leadership Thought: So What if Someone Calls You a Dreamer for You Are in Good Company.

Dear Family,

One of my favorite country groups was the  Highwaymen, a group comprised of Willie Nelson, Kris Kristofferson, and the late Johnny Cash and Waylon Jennings. One of my favorite songs of theirs was   “Desperados Waiting for the Train,” a song that conveys the thought of anticipation, of something just around the corner that might forever change their lives. It's a story of a dream, and dreams are important motivators for success.

I love the story of the little ten-year-old who was selling pencils door to door in his neighborhood. When an interested adult at one house asked him the reasons for selling pencils, He replied. “I want to raise six million dollars to build a new hospital for the city.” Amazed, the inquiring adult exclaimed “That’s a mighty big job for just one little boy, isn’t it?” “No,” the little boy responded.  “I have a friend who is helping me.”

I love that little story because I love that little boy. I love hanging around people like that-those who dream big dreams. I believe the world needs more people like this little boy. It needs people who are not afraid to dream and risk and dare to tackle great challenges. That is how progress is made and history is changed.

It was just 300 who were left from Gideon’s original army that defeated the Midianites, and it was only 120 faithful prayer warriors in that Upper Room who, after having received the promised Holy Spirit, ventured out boldly to win their world for Christ. And it was Jonathan with only one of his armor bearers who routed the whole Philistine army, because he knew that “Nothing can hinder the Lord from saving, whether by many or few.” (1 Samuel 14:6)

God has never been concerned with great numbers when it comes to accomplishing His will and purpose. The world needs dreamers who desire to do great things for God and who look to God and not the oddsmakers for they know that one with God is always a majority.

A number of years ago, the late Robert Schuller, helped transform a non-descript drive in movie theater in Orange County, California, into the magnificent Crystal Cathedral Unfortunately, following Schuller’s death, the church’s  influence and its once famous television ministry waned, and today it is home of the Orange County Roman Catholic diocese.  Whatever one thinks of Schuller’s theology, one can not dispute the fact that what he accomplished for Christ  was the direct result of his willingness to dream big dreams.

He writes. “My dreams had all come true and when the dream comes true it dies. It no longer sustains and feeds you. I have since written this prayer: ‘O God, let me die with my best dreams left unfulfilled’. “It’s a profound prayer for if I lived to see all my dreams come true, I will have died before I died.” Renew Your Life! Catch a New Dream, Robert Schuller, p. 6

Whether in the church, at home,  in the office or on the athletic field, we all must dare to dream big dreams, for dreams are the stuff from which success is made and the foundation on which progress is achieved. And you know it ain’t half bad when someone calls you a dreamer, for I know of another dreamer. His name was Joseph, and his brothers sarcastically labeled him a dreamer, and he didn’t do too bad for himself and his God.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Pastor Tom

Leadership Thought: You Better Read This If You Don’t Want to Be a Part of a Small Group.

Dear Friends

I want to ask you a question today. What is a disciple? How would you define the word? You know the word Christian is rarely used in the New Testament to describe a believer. When the Bible talks about a believer, it almost invariably refers to him/her as a disciple. Having said this, I wonder if maybe we should stop asking people if they are Christian, but instead ask if they are a disciple.

Pastor Rick Warren in one of his “Pastor Newsletters” writes. “if you want to be forgiven all you need to do is tell God. But if you want to be healed, you need to tell it to somebody else. Revealing your feelings is the beginning of healing. You are only as sick as your secrets.”

Andy Stanley was right in reminding us that, “Sheep are never attacked in herds. Sheep are attacked when they become isolated from the rest of the flock” (Creating Community, Andy Stanley, p32).

A lot of Christian discipleship deals with what you need to know, not who you need to be with. But it is true that if we get the relationships right, the information will follow. If you connect people in real gospel community, they will learn  (“The Exchange with Ed Stetzer”, 4 Reasons Small Groups are Vital to Your Church’s Health).

When I think of the word disciple, I think of a person who has accepted Christ as his/her personal Savior, is growing in faith, sharing the gospel with others, and is involved in a nurturing community where people are regularly meeting together to love and encourage and build up one another.

A Christian is one who is involved in community. Acts 2:42-43 describes the characteristics of this community. “They devoted themselves to the apostle’ teaching, and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread, and to prayer. Everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles.”

The early disciples lived in community. They met in groups. They shared their lives with one another. In every church I have served, I have either led or been a part of a small group. Today I am a part of a Men’s Spiritual Leadership group that meets in person, and a virtual Fellowship of Christian Athlete’s Coach’s group that meets virtually. From my perspective small groups are indispensable to my life and to the life blood of the church. If the church is to become the church God designed it to be, it will be a church fully committed to the ministry of small groups where people can get to know one another, laugh and cry together, and serve and minister alongside of one another.

Why would I want to be in a group, you might ask? Well, for one reason it was the model of the New Testament Church. The early disciples were committed to being together. It’s what characterized their ministry. It was their spiritual incubator for making disciples.

I know some of you may be thinking, “You will never get me in a group. I hate groups.” Well let me give you a non-spiritual reason for joining a group. You will live longer if you do, and I think most of us would agree that that might be a good rationale for at least considering joining.

Let me close with a remarkable study on health and small groups. “Researchers found that the most isolated people were three times more likely to die than those with strong relational connections. People who had bad health habits (such as smoking, poor eating habits, obesity, or alcohol use) but strong social ties lived significantly longer than people who had great health habits but were isolated. In other words, it is better to eat Twinkies with good friends than to eat broccoli alone.” Everybody’s Normal Til You Get to Know Them, John Ortberg p 33

There you have it. Want to live longer? Join a group, and if you do you may not only add years to your life but life to your years, and even better than that, you begin to become a living example of what a disciple is called to be.

Yours in faith,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Success May Be Just Around the Corner, So Keep Scratching.

Dear Friends

There are few things more important to the success of an individual than perseverance. The late football player and former Stanford football coach Dennis Green was fond of saying. “The secret of success is to start from scratch and keep on scratching.” 

As a former coach, I admire the quality of that kind of perseverance.  James  writes, “Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.” James 1:12. I want to be steadfast in my love for Jesus, so that I, too, might wear the crown of life.

Our brother Paul writes, “And let us not grow weary of doing good for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” Galatians 6:9.

It has been said that it is always too soon to quit, and even if the outcome has already been decided, I still want to give it my all and be able to say with the Apostle Paul, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day-and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing.” (2 Timothy 4:7-8).

A number of years ago I copied the following material from one of John Maxwell’s many books, but  unfortunately, I did not note the title nor do I remember the book. Maxwell wrote, “There is an old saying: Champions don't become champions in the ring - they are merely recognized there. Joe Frazier, the former heavyweight champion of the world, said ‘if you want to see where someone develops into a champion, look at his daily routine.’ Fraser remarked, ‘You can map out a fight plan or a life plan. But when the action starts, you are down to your reflexes. That is where your road work shows. If you cheated on that in the dark of the morning, you're getting found out now under the bright lights.’”

Maxwell then went on to discuss how President Teddy Roosevelt was such an incredible example of perseverance in sharing Roosevelt’s famous boxing analogy.

“It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who, strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”

Maxwell goes on to provides the following information on Roosevelt’s perseverance. “On January 6, 1919, at his home in New York, Teddy Roosevelt died in his sleep. Then Vice President George Marshall said, ‘Death had to take him sleeping, for if Roosevelt had been awake, there would have been a fight.’

When they removed him from his bed, they found a book under his pillow. Up to the very last, Teddy Roosevelt was still striving to learn and to improve himself.”

Becoming better at whatever you do, takes perseverance. It takes a never say die attitude, and attitude that fights through every challenge and every obstacle that stands in the way of success.

I leave you with another one of Teddy Roosevelt’s famous quotes: “Courage is not having the strength to go on; it is going on when you don’t have the strength.” (quote taken from the internet)

Don’t quit at whatever you would seek to do or become, for success may be just around the corner. Keep scratching!

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: A Birthday Party I Will Never Forget-or Have You Ever Been Embarrassed by the Gifts You Have Given?

Dear Friends,

Thoughtfulness is a wonderful quality to possess. According to one dictionary definition it is simply “the consideration for the needs of other people.”

Thoughtfulness means “spending time putting yourself in other people's shoes. It means considering what is in the best interest of others. It means putting thought into what can make others feel good. Thoughtfulness involves focusing on caring for others through your words and actions” (From the Internet).

Some people just seem to possess the quality of thoughtfulness in full measure. They just show up at the right time, say the right words, offer the right help, share the perfect gift. Thoughtfulness is a gift that seems to come naturally to some people.

In celebrating a recent birthday. I was blessed to be the beneficiary of our team’s  thoughtfulness. The team thoughtfully chose to celebrate my birthday at my favorite Chinese restaurant. Someone thoughtfully picked out some balloons to decorate the table, and they all chose especially  thoughtful gifts. Nothing lavish for thoughtfulness is never expensive. A simple card with a chocolate candy bar with an accompanying encouraging note of gratitude, an autobiography, “My House of Memories” by the late Merle Haggard, my favorite country singer, and a tribute CD of country stars honoring Merle with the singing of many of his hits. And accompanying the book and CD was a tribute shirt of that concert with the names of all those country singers who performed at the concert.

I received another book,  A Leader’s Heart, a 365 Day Devotional Journal by John Maxwell, one of my favorite writers. And then came a face mask with the emblem of my favorite team, the Cleveland Indians. And then to cap it off there was the surprise gift of all, an artfully handcrafted ice cream cake made by one of our team. Knowing my love for Aldi’s Grocery Store and aware of two of my favorite Aldi’s ice cream flavors, “Thank You Cherry, Cherry Much” and “Make Fudge Not War,” he had mixed the flavors together into a cake that was covered with whipped cream, to produce and ice cream cake that rivaled anything that Carvel could ever  create.

Nothing lavish, but ‘expensively’ thoughtful were those gifts for each one of them screamed "I cared enough to choose a special gift that I thought would touch your heart."

I wish I could be as thoughtful as some of my staff, but I am not. Too often have been the times I have rushed to Walgreens in the middle of the night to pick up a some balloons, a card and some Jean Nate perfume  (my go to birthday/anniversary gift) to be packaged with a previously purchased Outback gift card to be presented to Jean on some special occasion. Shame on me for not putting more time and thought into my gifts.

My staff taught me a great lesson in thoughtfulness last week, and it is a lesson that I hope I will never forget. They taught me that thoughtfulness doesn’t cost a lot, just a heart prompted by love, and coupled with a little  time and effort-all  designed to bring joy to the heart of another person.

Mary Martin speaks to me when she writes, let’s “stop the habit of wishful thinking and start the habit of thoughtful wishes.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: The Words from Dan Marino That I Will Never Forget.

Dear Friends,

Last night I attended a virtual high school baseball umpire’s meeting as I prepare for another year of high school umpiring.  As a high school baseball umpire for almost 30 years, I have heard my share of “Where was that pitch, blue,” a vernacular for “put on some glasses for you are blind as a bat.” Unruly fans have become more the rule than the exception in our sports culture of today. Our lack of civility and sensibility has trickled down to sports talk radio where callers voice their opinion in ways that defy understanding.

For 8 years I served as chaplain and athletic director for Calvary Christian Academy in Fort Lauderdale, Fl. Some or our sporting events were not only well attended, but they were marked by as much fervor and excitement as one finds in the biggest college rivalries.  Because of the potential for disparaging our Christian witness, we were always concerned about how both our fans and our players would conduct themselves.

While it may be hard to believe, one high school took sportsmanship to a whole new level. They instituted a novel and unusual policy to police sportsmanship at their basketball games. They took three students from one of their leadership clubs and gave each of them two cards, a red one and a yellow one. When a parent was guilty of doing something of an unsportsmanlike character (yelling at an official, criticizing a coach, barking at another player) one of the students would go up into the stands and issue a yellow card or a red card to the offending spectator. Yellow said, “Please show more poise and self-control”. And the red said, “your behavior is inappropriate, please leave.”

When the basketball coach was asked how many times this system has been implemented, he replied, “only once.” Imagine how humbling it would be for a fan, especially a parent of a player, to be escorted from a game by a student because that person had modeled poor behavior. It is true that when adults behave like children, children will never learn how to behave as adults.

Now you might laugh at such a novel idea. It is unrealistic you say, and you are probably right.  But I can tell you from my experience of umpiring and watching Friday night high school football games, it might be one of the most effective ways to quell such offensive behavior.

Paul writes to the Philippian Church, and he exhorts them to “Let your conversation becometh the gospel of Christ.” Philippians 1:27. He also exhorts them in Ephesians 4:29 “not to let any unwholesome words come out of their mouths, but only that which is helpful for building others up according to their need.” Those are wise words for all of us to hear whether as spectators at games or those calling in on talk radio.

I will never forget hearing the words from the mouth of retired former Dolphin quarterback Dan Marino whose son played on one of the teams we played. He told one of our player’s parents whom he was sitting next to that “he had never seen greater sportsmanship or self-control exemplified by any school his son had played.” I will never forget his parting comments to that parent who told me he said, “I would like to know more about your school.”

Gathering at the center court of our basketball games and at the 50 yard line of our football field to pray with our secular school opponents was one way our school was able to witness to the world, but the power of that witness could be quickly lost in an instant by the words of an unruly fan, or the conduct of an impatient volunteer ticket taker, or the critical gesture of a player directed to an official over a missed call. Beware, those of you who attend any sporting activity, the eyes of the world are on you as you serve, as you play, as you coach, as you watch, and yes, even as you take tickets or serve food. What kind of witness will you leave for people to remember you by?

A young man went into a restaurant, and he noticed the sweet fragrance of roses wafting through the dining room. When he asked the waitress if there was a rose garden nearby, she exclaimed, “No, but there is a perfume factory across the street, and it’s quitting time, and what you are smelling is the fragrance of perfume on the clothes and bodies of those leaving from the factory.”

Wherever we go, let us make sure that we too leave the same kind of fragrance of Christ behind. Paul says it well when he writes “But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of Him. For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are the smell of death, to the other, the fragrance of life.” 2 Cor. 14:16

Be on guard New Monmouth brothers and sisters. Your words and actions reveal more about your character than you would ever think!

Yours in faith,

Pastor Tom

Leadership Thought: Are You a Fisherman or Do You Only Like to Talk about Fishing?

The  Parable below of the Fishless Fishermen was written by Mark Cahill, evangelist, and writer of One Heartbeat Away and One Thing You Can’t Do in Heaven.

Dear Friends

Now it came to pass that a group existed who called themselves fishermen. And lo, there were many fish in the waters all around. In fact, the whole area was surrounded by streams and lakes filled with fish. And the fish were hungry.

Year after year, those who called themselves fishermen met in meetings and talked about their call to fish, the abundance of fish, and how they might go about fishing.

Continually, they searched for new and better definitions of fishing. They sponsored costly nationwide and worldwide congresses to discuss fishing and to promote fishing and hear about all the ways of fishing.

These fishermen built large, beautiful buildings called “Fishing Headquarters.” The plea was that everyone should be a fisherman and every fisherman should fish. One thing they didn’t do, however; they didn’t fish.

They organized a board to send out fishermen to where there were many fish. The board was formed by those who had the great vision and courage to speak about fishing, to define fishing, and to promote the idea of fishing in faraway streams and lakes where many other fish of different colors lived.

Also, the board hired staff and appointed committees and held many meetings to define fishing, to defend fishing, and to decide what new streams should be thought about. But the staff and committee members did not fish.

Expensive training centers were built to teach fishermen how to fish. Those who taught had doctorates in fishology, but the teachers did not fish. They only taught fishing. Year after year, graduates were sent to do full-time fishing, some to distant waters filled with fish.

Further, the fishermen built large printing houses to publish fishing guides. A speaker’s bureau was also provided to schedule special speakers on the subject of fishing.

Many who felt the call to be fishermen responded and were sent to fish, but like the fishermen back home, they never fished.

Some also said they wanted to be part of the fishing party, but they felt called to furnish fishing equipment. Others felt their job was to relate to the fish in a good way so the fish would know the difference between good and bad fishermen.

After one stirring meeting on “The Necessity for Fishing,” a young fellow left the meeting and went fishing. The next day he reported he had caught two outstanding fish. He was honored for his excellent catch and scheduled to visit all the biggest meetings possible to tell how he did it.

So, he quit fishing in order to have time to tell about the experience to the other fishermen. He was also placed on the Fishermen’s General Board as a person having considerable experience.

Now, it’s true that many of the fishermen sacrificed and put up with all kinds of difficulties.

 Some lived near the water and bore the smell of dead fish every day. They received the ridicule of some who made fun of their fishermen’s clubs and the fact that they claimed to be fishermen yet never fished.

They wondered about those who felt it was of little use to attend the weekly meetings to talk about fishing. After all, were they not following the Master who said, “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men?”

Imagine how hurt some were when, one day, a person suggested that those who didn’t catch fish were really not fishermen, no matter how much they claimed to be. Yet, it did sound correct. Is a person a fisherman if year after year he never catches a fish?

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Defining Moments and my 80^th Birthday.

Dear Friends,

Yesterday was a defining moment for me. On the day before I celebrated my 80^th birthday, Jean and I had the wonderful opportunity to celebrate my birthday with some dear friends on our church staff. Some I had known from my first interim, and some from my second interim, but all of them have become special to me.

It was a wonderful time of sharing stories, both serious and whimsical, as we gathered around the table of my favorite Chinese restaurant. I will save you the details of our time together, however,  suffice to say  it was one of the most wonderful and memorable times of my life as I received cards, unforgettable gifts, balloons and a handcrafted ice cream cake fashioned by one of our pastors and made from two of my favorite Aldi’s ice cream products, "Make Fudge Not War,” and “Thank You Cherry Cherry Much.” (If you are not an Aldi’s shopper you are missing out, but that’s another story.

I have been blessed to serve in some wonderful churches and with some great people, but none of them have been more wonderful than the people with whom I have served the last five years, which has included two interims and now a regular staff position with two other younger pastors.

My Leadership Thought today was generated by yesterday’s birthday celebration  with staff and a  Friday morning Fellowship of Christian Athlete’s (FCA)  meeting with coaches from all over the northeast who meet by zoom for Bible study. This past Friday the subject was “Defining Moments in Your Life.”

A defining moment has been described as “a point in which the essential character of a person is formed. an  identify-forming event that changes you and your circumstances.”

For me, the most defining moment in my life was when I knelt beside my cot in Lake Geneva, Wisc. at a summer Fellowship of Christian Athletes Conference in 1962 and gave my life to Christ.

But there have been countless other defining moments in my life, maybe not as life changing as my conversion, but which have been pivotal in shaping  my life in significant ways. They would include marriage, college and career choices, friends, family, and  business decisions…

I have found the “Defining Moments” study to be an intriguing and valuable time for me as I was challenged to recall many of those events and decisions  that have made me who I am.

If you are looking for an interesting Bible study you might wish to ask participants to share any one of a number of defining moments in their lives and then discuss how those defining moments impacted their life. From there you might examine defining moments in the life of biblical characters and how the decisions they made impacted their life and the lives of others.

The main character on which we focused  was Paul and his Damascus Road experience. We discussed how that experience changed not only his life but the lives of the world around him as his newfound faith gave birth to rise and spread of Christianity. There are others: Peter’s decision to step out of the boat and walk on water, or his denials of Jesus, or his second chance to follow Jesus given on the seashore following Jesus’ resurrection. There is Moses choosing to step out in faith and lead his people through the Red Sea, or Joshua boldly declaring, “Choose this day whom you will serve but as for me and my household we will serve the Lord,” or David making a dent in the head of Goliath with a small stone from a tiny slingshot, or the coming off the Spirit at Pentecost, or the miraculous deliverance of Peter and John from prison, or the resurrection experiences of the women who discovered the empty tomb, or the “follow me and I will make you fishers of men” challenge. These are just a few of the many  life changing experiences worthy of study.

Identify what a defining moment is and then examine those defining moments in your life and share how those special moments have shaped your life. Ask God to show you how you can create a defining moment in the lives of others. Ask how God judges a defining moment, and what might have happened if you had not responded as you did to the challenge or decision before you.

Pick your character, share your story, and I promise that you will have an exciting and memorable Bible study.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Becoming a Talent Scout for Jesus (What I Learned in the Classroom and Working with Addiction).

Dear Friends,

One of the joys of my ministry has been working with those struggling with addiction. While pastoring in Fort Lauderdale, Jean and I would host a weekly dinner for addicts who were living in our church’s  addiction facility. It was always amazing to hear their stories and to learn how their lives had changed since entering the yearlong program.

Now at New Monmouth, I am involved  weekly in another addiction program, U Turn for Christ, a live-in program similar to the one in Fort Lauderdale. We spend an hour having lunch together, sharing a devotional, and getting to listen and hear one another's stories.

It is a time when I try and ask a lot of questions, and then be a good listener, so I can hear the addict’s story as he battles with addiction. Like many rehabilitation programs there are successes and failures. There is sadness when one walks away from the program, but there is joy when  someone “gets it” and comes to know Jesus personally and you witness  the life change that evolves.

As I spend time with these guys, I often think back to a quote I saved while I was a classroom teacher. “One of the most effective ways to draw students to us and our teaching is to recognize and encourage their gifts and talents. The truth is that each student who enters our classroom brings unique potential, even though sometimes it may be difficult to discover. Yet, one of the most important roles is to be a talent scout with our students. When we take the time to look for, uncover, and nurture what even students themselves may not realize is present, we can spark a relationship with us and a new interest in what happens in our classroom. We may even change a life”(The Master Teacher, volume 33).

Whether we are teachers, pastors, parents, employees, or employers, I believe there is a lesson for all of us in the above passage God has called us to be talent scouts for Jesus. He has called us to help uncover the gifts and abilities of whomever we encounter. And yes, this includes some addicts sitting around a luncheon table whom many might have rejected and written off as hopeless.

To be a successful talent scout means that we first must believe in the other person. We must help them see their unrecognized potential. And once we do that, we must make every effort to encourage them to develop and deploy that potential.

Like Barnabas, one of the early disciples, we must be discerning as we look for those individuals with special abilities. It was Barnabas who saw the potential in the apostle Paul when the Jerusalem elders were afraid to welcome him, fearing that his conversion was not genuine, and he was nothing more than a wolf in sheep's clothing.

Barnabas recognized the potential in Paul. He believed in him, encouraged him, and introduced him to the church leaders, ignoring his dreadful past history of persecuting Christians. Barnabas was a talent scout for Jesus, and because he was, Paul got started in a new life of missionary service. But if Barnabas had not recognized the potential in Paul, he might have become a ‘spiritual dropout.’ And if this had happened, the New Testament would be minus 13 letters that Paul wrote to different individuals and churches he had known and visited.

Many people have never discovered their potential because they've not been fortunate to have someone like Barnabas who believed in them and who was willing to invest in them.

This reminds me of a story about Hamilton College’s celebration of its Centennial. One of the most famous alumni, Alexander Wolcott, was asked to give a major address. Horace Fenton Jr., remembers that Wolcott opened his speech in this way:  “I send my greetings today to all my fellow alumni of Hamilton College, scattered all over the world. Some of you are successes, and some of you are failures- only God knows which are which.”

It is true that we don't always know successful people when we first see them. As a result, we need to be careful that we don't make incorrect assumptions about them. If we are a talent scout for Jesus, we will be about the business of believing the best about the other person and helping them to believe the best about themselves. So, let’s start  our talent scouting today.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Don’t Just Wish for Longer Legs.

Dear Friends,

I still remember the title of a book that I read a number of years ago, You Can’t Steal Second With Your Foot on First. The title is a good reminder to me that risk is essential for growth in every area of our lives.

It is safe to say that you and I will never reach our full potential without taking risks in our lives. You have probably heard the phrase, "if you want to enjoy the fruit, you have to go out on the limb." You won’t find the good fruit by safely clinging to the tree trunk and picking some of the fruit that has fallen to the ground. Most of that fruit is rotten. No, you got to be willing to risk by climbing out on the limb to reach the good fruit.

Without risk there can be no reward. Those who have accomplished great things in life are those who have been willing to leave their comfort zone and step into their risk zone.  

John Maxwell writes, “20 years from now, you will be more disappointed by the risks you didn't take then by the ones you did. Defeat tomorrow's regret by moving forward and getting into the faith zone today.” Running with Giants , John Maxwell, p. 45

There will always be those times in our life when, like Moses, we will discover reasons that could easily give birth to regret:

“Who am I that I should go?” Exodus 3:11

“What shall I say to them?” Exodus 3:13

“But suppose they will not believe me?” Exodus 4:1

“But I am slow of speech.” Exodus 4:10

I well remember my time at Calvary Chapel, Fort Lauderdale, where we were always encouraged to take risks. I recall many times encouraging our physical education team to never be afraid to try new things.  Charting new paths and creating new ways of ministry always involved a certain level of risk, but in the midst of our ministry at Calvary, we were always secure in knowing that there would be a lot of grace provided those who failed. Yes, it is true that sometimes risk takers can create an awful mess, but the alternative-the safe, the traditional, the comfortable can often be the dead, lifeless and the boring. As long as we are resting in the strength of Jesus, and we are secure in Him, we ought to be able to risk trying new ways of doing things that will keep our ministry fresh and exciting and never boring.

I still remember the church’s decision to field a competitive paint ball team and building a huge indoor skateboarding complex, all because they saw these as outreach opportunities that would help us share the gospel in unconventional ways.

Everything in this life is a risk. We are given only two options. Take the risk and expect results or don’t take a risk and expect nothing. Stop procrastinating! God uses people like Moses Joshua, David, Paul, Peter, who are willing to step out of their comfort zone and minister in their risk zone. Like Peter, you and I have to step out of the boat onto the water, to see the miracles God has in store for us.

Whatever risk you might be facing-a relationship risk, a witnessing risk, a family risk, a business risk, a job risk, a life decision, know that the Lord is with you and He makes it abundantly clear that He will help you.

When you are called to step out in faith, realize that our God is greater than any problem. Take a moment to be quiet and remind yourself of who is in control.

And if you need any additional encouragement, to lift your foot off first to can get to second, reflect on the following quotes:

“Take the risk or lose the chance.”

“If you want it, go for it. Take a risk. Don’t always play it safe or you’ll die wondering.”

“Great things never came from comfort zones.”

“Better an oops than a what if.”

Quotes taken from internet “Take the Risk or Lose the Chance,” (no author given)

And yes, don’t be the guy who only wanted longer legs so he could reach second with one foot still on first.

Yours risking,

Tom

P.S. 2 Timothy 1:7 “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”