Dear
Friends,
Someone said there are
two kinds of people. Those who like hugs and those who don't. Make no
mistake about it, I am in the former group. I can't imagine my life
without hugging and being hugged. love hugs and I love giving them, so if you
are a member of the non-hugging group, please avoid me at all costs.
I wasn't always a
hugger. It happened over 30 years ago when a member of the church I was serving
provided our staff with a powerful lesson on the value of the hug. Barbara
Brillhart was a registered nurse before coming to our staff, and at one of our
staff meetings she gave us a powerful lesson on the value of hugging. I will
never forget Barb or the lesson she taught us that day. I can still
picture her leading us in the practice of the different forms of the hug
and then practicing those hugs on one another. The one I will always remember,
and the hug I practice the most, especially among women, is the "A
Frame" which as you might imagine is one of the safest and most
appropriate expressions of hugging you can offer.
What put the subject of
hugging on my mind this morning was a quote from Dane Ortland's book Gentle and
Lowly that was recently passed on to me by one of the members of our
staff. I was intrigued by Ortland's words describing Jesus' practice of love in
action. Ortland writes, "What did Jesus do whenever he saw the unclean?
What was his first impulse when he came across prostitutes and lepers? He moved
toward them. Pity flooded his heart, the longing of true compassion. He spent
time with them. He touched them. We all can testify to the humanness of touch. A warm hug does something warm words of
greeting alone cannot" (Gentle and Lowly, p 31).
It is so true that a tender hug, given at just the right time and in the right
circumstances, and in the right spirit can often communicate a
message more significant than words could ever express.
A
number of years ago I read a story about a set of twins who were only a few
days old. One of them had been born with a serious heart condition and wasn't
expected to live. A few days went by, and one baby's health continued to
deteriorate, and she was close to death. A hospital nurse asked if she could go
against hospital policy and put the babies in the same incubator together,
rather than individual incubators. It was a big ordeal, but finally the doctor
consented to allow the twins to be placed side by side in the same incubator,
just as they had been in their mother's womb.
Somehow,
the healthy baby managed to reach over and put his arm around his little sick
sister. Before long, and for no apparent reason, her heart began to stabilize
and heal. Her blood pressure came up to normal. Her temperature soon followed
suit. Little by little she got better, and today they are both perfectly
healthy children. A newspaper caught wind of the story and photographed the
twins while still in the incubator, embraced in a hug. They ran the photo with
the caption, "The Rescuing Hug” Your Best Life Now, Joel Osteen, p.
224.
Today
we know the power of the hug. We have learned that hugging another person has
positive physiological benefits for the body. The secretion of
oxytocin a hormone is one of them. Oxytocin is known as the attachment or
bonding hormone, and it's not just for children-it improves the quality of
life in people regardless of what their age is.
Is
there someone you know who needs a "rescuing hug?" I may be like
a lifeline thrown to the one who is going down for the last time in a sea
of discouragement. Maybe that hug will provide the touch that transforms a
heart of sadness into a heart of hope. Yes, you can hug from a distance: a kind
note, a caring phone, an e-mail can be wonderful expressions of love, but
will always be a lesser substitute for the healing power of one's hug.
Barb
Brillhart has gone to be with the Lord, but I thank God for this wonderful
woman and the lesson she taught me on the healing power of the hug.
Yours
in faith and friendship,
Tom
P.S.
"Don't forget that a hug is like a boomerang-you get it back right
away"
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