Leadership Thought: A Policewoman’s Encounter That Opened My Eyes to the Transforming Power of Kindness.

Dear Friends,

I was in a hurry, too much of a hurry when she stopped me.

I was on my way to Florida to visit friends when I saw out of my rear-view mirror those dreaded blinking red lights. I pulled over and reaching for my wallet, I pulled out my license as the policewoman made her way to my car.

I knew I had been speeding-probably somewhere near 80 in a 60-mile per hour zone, and I could only imagine the fine awaiting me.

As she stood outside my window, she asked, “Where are you heading?”

 I said, “I was heading to Florida to see some friends.”

And then it happened. I suddenly erupted into a flood of tears, crying uncontrollably as the policewoman began reading my license. My emotional outburst was uncontrived and not in any way premeditated in an effort to gain her sympathy.

I apologized for my tears as I told her, “My wife died a week ago, and I was heading to Fort Lauderdale to see some friends and that I was still pretty fragile emotionally.”

She hesitated for a moment, probably not sure how to handle the moment, perhaps thinking to herself, “I’ve never heard ‘this one’ before.” 

And then she quietly said, “I am so sorry,” as she handed me back my license and said, “Please take it easy as I want you to get to Fort Lauderdale safely," and then she turned and walked back to her car.

I can’t tell you how relieved I was by her words. But the relief was not so much the result of avoiding a hefty fine; it was relief that I had met someone so kind as to overlook my transgression and give me a second chance.

All the way to Florida I thought of that encounter and how kind she was to me at a time when I was so emotionally fragile. Her kindness changed the way I drove the rest of the way. I was careful to keep my eyes on the speedometer lest I take advantage of her kindness.

Every little act of kindness can make a difference in a person’s life. How different our world would be if we were to practice kindness to everyone we meet. What if out of kindness we gave everyone the benefit of the doubt when they said or did something that hurt or angered us?

What if we responded with empathy and understanding, as this policewoman did, when we had violated someone’s trust?”

As one writer said, “Kindness asks us to extend our approach beyond niceties and good manners, and into transformative action, compassionate and intentional inclusion and empowering solutions….kindness is a choice, a muscle we all flex, and which could quite frankly use a little more of our attention.”

Ian MacLaren reminds us, “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”

Archbishop Desmond Tutu writes, “Do your little bit of good where you are. It’s those little bits of good put together that can overwhelm the world.”

Our world desperately needs kindness and what a difference we could make in that world if we took seriously the exhortation of the Apostle Paul who writes,” Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)

When that kind of love is practiced, it changes your heart, just as it changed mine on that winding road somewhere in the middle of North Carolina.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. "Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness." Seneca