Leadership Thought: Who’s Your Best Friend and How Long Have You Known Him/Her? (You Might Be Surprised to Know Mine).

Dear Friends,

Tucked away in the Apostle Paul’s closing remarks to Timothy is a verse that is easy to miss. Paul writes, “When you come, bring the cloak that I left with Carpus at Troas, and my scrolls, especially the parchments (2 Timothy 4:13). Scholars suggest that the parchments may have been part of the Old Testament. In any event, this got me to thinking about the importance of good books and what friends they have been to me over the years of my ministry.

Some of my friends have been sitting on my shelves for over 50 years, but like the Word, there some things that never grow old.

There has always been a battle brewing in the Crenshaw household over the number of friends I have brought home. I remember as we were leaving Fort Lauderdale to retire 12 years ago, I found an old cardboard box my wife had dumped in the corner of my office with a note that said, “Sort out the most important 100 books and put them in the box and give the rest away.” Those words struck terror in my heart. Get rid of my friends. Send them packing. “No, no, no, I can’t do it,” I cried.

The retirement part didn’t work out any better than her efforts to ditch my friends. Most all of them traveled north with me and found residence on a new set of shelves that take up most of my office.

Only a lover of books can understand and appreciate how difficult it is to give your books away. Maybe I am just  selfish for I know my library takes up considerable room in my office, and now in my apartment, but you can’t just walk away from your friends.

Long ago I copied down a quote that has stayed with me to this day. It was Mark Twain who said, “The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read at all.” That caught my attention the first time I read it, and it still resonates with me today.

Last night at our Men’s Spiritual Leadership Class, the lesson from Oswald Sander’s book was on “The Leader and Reading,” and we spent the evening discussing the value of reading. We all agreed that leaders are readers, and the more we read the better leaders we will become.

One of the questions we discussed was, “What books have had the greatest impact on your life and why? As we shared some of our favorite books, I found myself hard pressed to limit my answers for there have been so many books that have shaped and impacted my ministry that I wouldn’t know where to begin or where to stop.

A.W. Tozer was wise when he wrote, “The things you read will fashion you by slowly conditioning your mind.” And how true were his words.  I confess that if there is any wisdom that comes from my mouth, it has almost always comes from someone I have read, and while I may not know his or her name, their wisdom has permeated my mind and left its imprint on my thinking.

And the late Chuck Colson writes “Next to acquiring good friends, the best acquisition is that of a good book.” He was right.

As we closed our evening last night, we had fun discussing the following question. “If the notes and files of your reading were to be turned over to a detective-psychologist for character analysis, what would they conclude about you?”

That’s a good question for a small group, and it’s a good question for you to think about today.

Let me hear from you as I would be interested in hearing your answers.

To be continued tomorrow…

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

P.S. Do any of you know any good 12 Step Programs for book hoarders like me? Just asking!

Leadership Thought: Soup, the Savior and a Chinese Waiter named Lee.

Dear Friend

In his commentary to the Letter to the Hebrews, William Barclay writes, “One of the highest of human duties is the duty of encouragement…It is easy to laugh at men’s ideals; it is easy to pour cold water on their enthusiasm; it is easy to discourage others. The world is full of discouragers. We have a Christian duty to encourage one another. Many a time a word or phrase of thanks or appreciation or cheer has kept  a man on his feet. Blessed is the man who speaks such a word.” Quoted from the Tale of the Tardy Oxcart, Charles Swindoll, p 179.

Encouragement  brings a twofold blessing, for it is true that "the best way to cheer yourself up is to cheer somebody else up." When you  cheer someone else up, you make two people happy, so encouragement is a great investment.

Encouragement is so easy to dispense. Yesterday Jean and I had lunch at one of our favorite Chinese restaurants, The House of Chong. Over the last couple of years, we have gotten to know one of the waiters at the restaurant; his name is Lee. They have wonderful hot and sour soup there, in fact the best I have tasted anywhere, so yesterday I simply bragged to Lee about how good the soup was. Suddenly his eyes lit up, he smiled, and he asked quizzically, “Really, you think it is the best?” and I said, “Yes, it’s the best.” You would have thought Lee had won the lottery by the expression on his face.

I think Lee and I will be friends for life. I am not sure Lee is a believer, but every time I see him, I try to find something encouraging to say to him. I really care for Lee, and the compliment about the soup was real and genuine. My hope is that as the relationship continues to develop, the conversation will reach a deeper level.

Building a relationship is an important part of evangelism, and one of these days I suspect the conversation will turn from hot and sour soup to something a lot more consequential, for soup is one thing, but the Savior is a whole different story.

Let me encourage you to find your Lee today and maybe God will begin to write the first chapter in another one of his exciting God stories.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: I Couldn’t Believe What I Received in the Mail.

Dear Friends,

“Would that all of us could go on hug hunts, but with social distancing in place, those hugs Mae longs for may have to wait. But if you do desire to hug someone, let me suggest an acceptable alternative. Just pick up some paper and a pen and send your hug through the mail.”

These were the concluding words to yesterday’s Leadership Thought on sending “hugs” through the mail. Little did I imagine that I would be the beneficiary of my own devotional.  

Waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs where my mail is often left, was a bright red envelope. I looked at the return address, and it read Cleveland, Tennessee. I was curious to open it to find who would be sending me mail from Tennessee. Inside the envelope was a Christmas card. I quickly opened it to read the following: “Christmas blessings from Southeastern Tennessee. Tom, thanks so much for making the Gospel come alive to me so many years ago.” It was signed Jim and Suzie Laird.

Old friends who I haven’t seen for over 30 years. My heart was touched, as I read those words from such dear friends. I thought back to Jean and my days in Greenville, Pa. where I pastored for seven years, and the wonderful memories I still recall from our time there.

“God truly does  give us memories, so that we might smell the roses in December.”

Later on that night I made I made a phone call to another Greenville friend in the same church. It wasn’t a hug in the mail as the Laird’s gift came, but it was a hug from the heart that hopefully brought love to a hurting friend. I had called Carolyn when I learned that she not only lost her husband to Covid on Christmas Eve, but also a son just two weeks before to the same virulent disease.

Yesterday was a day of joy and sadness all rolled up as one. I went to bed thankful that I had been wonderfully blessed that day. On one hand I was blessed by reading such kind and encouraging words from good friends from the  past. On the other hand, I was blessed to offer some hopeful and encouraging words to a friend in the present.

There is a time to give and a time to receive, and one is blessed when he can experience both blessings in one day. As Henri Nouwen writes, “We need equal time for both if we want to live healthy lives."

So, start writing, or maybe just pick up the phone and start calling; that is, if you want to stay healthy.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought:  May Sass and Her Longing for a Rescuing Hug.

Dear Friend,

She is ‘only’ 95, and when last week she was asked what she wanted for Christmas. You won't believe what she asked for.

May Sass, a member of our church is now living in an assistant living facility an hour from our church. She is regularly and faithfully visited by Eileen Thomas, another member of our church. Recently Eileen was visiting May-not your typical visit- but a conversational visit in which she was talking by phone with May who was on the other side of a  plexiglass window like you often see in those Dateline dramas. Their conversation was suddenly interrupted by a visiting elf from the North Pole, one of Santa’s emissaries seeking to spread some Christmas cheer to those isolated residents.   And when she  asked May what Santa could bring her for Christmas. May’s simple request was, “Just tell Santa I want a hug and a kiss.”

Hugs and kisses are in short supply during this Pandemic season.  While I recognize the importance of social distancing, I confess it is hard for me to give up one of my favorite social activities, the hug. I have always been a hugger, ever since a former member in a church I pastored taught our staff the therapeutic value of the hug.  Ever since that day back in the 90’s, there’s  not many times I miss an opportunity to reveal my hugging skills.

As I thought about my friend May Sass, I remembered  an amazing story I read about a set of twins who were only a few days old. I quote, “One of them had been born with a serious heart condition and wasn’t expected to live. A few days went by and one baby’s health continued to deteriorate; she was close to death. A hospital nurse asked if she could go against hospital policy and put the babies in the same incubator together, rather than in individual incubators. It was a big ordeal, but finally the doctor consented to allow the twins to be placed side by side in the same incubator, just as they had been in their mother’s womb.”

“Somehow the healthy baby managed to reach over and put his arm around his little sick sister. Before long, and for no apparent reason, her heart began to stabilize and heal. Her blood pressure came up to normal. Her temperature soon followed suit. Little by little she got better and today they are both perfectly healthy children. A newspaper caught wind of the story and photographed the twins while still in the incubator, embraced in a hug. They ran the photo with the caption, ‘The Rescuing Hug’” Your Best Life Now, Joel Osteen, p 224.

As a pastor I have learned that a tender hug at just the right time, and in the right circumstances, given in the right spirit can communicate a message more significant than words could ever express.

We all could use a hug in times of need. We are like the little boy who came up to his coach after dropping a key pass during the game and asked, “Coach, do you think you could give me another hug?”

Paul reminds us in 1 Thess. 5:11 that we are, “To speak encouraging words to one another. Build up hope so you'll all be together in this, no one left out, no one left behind. I know you are already doing this; just keep on doing it."  (the Message Bible).

Would that all of us could go on 'hug hunts' but with social distancing the fashion, those hugs May longs for may have to wait. I know that arms were meant for hugging, but if you are looking for a socially acceptable alternative, why not pick up some paper and a pen and send your hugs through the mail?

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Are You Pulling in the Right Direction?

Dear Friends,

“My husband and I have a very happy marriage, a woman bragged. There is nothing I wouldn’t do for him, and there is nothing he wouldn’t do for me. And that is the way we go through life-doing nothing for each other.”

We can laugh at this joke, but unfortunately it is an attitude that can easily impact a team. Whether in marriage, or athletics, or in the workplace, not much of value will be accomplished without team members who are committed to doing what’s in the best interest of the team.

Over the years of ministry, I have always been blessed to serve on wonderful teams where no one cared who got the credit and where every individual team member exemplified the goal of “one for all and all for one.”

Working together unselfishly to achieve a common goal is one of the most rewarding experiences in all of  life. As an athlete, coach, and pastor, I know that great things can be accomplished when no one cares who gets the credit.

It is true that “one is always too small a number to achieve greatness,” and that “teamwork makes dream work” as John Maxwell is fond of saying.

I read that there is a sign hanging in the New England Patriot's locker room that says, "Individuals play the game but teams win championships," and it is hard to dispute the truth of that statement when you reflect on the Patriots success over the years. Players without that attitude didn’t last very long on Coach Belichick’s teams.

The Apostle Paul was a consummate team player. He knew that ministry was a team effort, and that each player had a particular role to play and a gift to share in achieving  team success.

He writes, “I appeal to you brothers, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be united in the same mind and the same judgement ( 1 Cor.1:10 ESV).

And when some were saying that they were following Paul, and some Apollos and some Peter, Paul responded as a true team player would. He asked, “But did I, Paul, die for your sins? Were any of you baptized in my name? I am so thankful that I didn’t baptize any of you except Crispus and Gaius. For now, no one can think that I have been trying to start something new, beginning a church of Paul” (1 Cor. 1:13-15. Living Bible Translation).

No ego for Paul. He knew there was no “I” in team as one of my coaches used to always remind us. All he cared about was that ministry was accomplished and it mattered not  who  did it, or who got the credit, so long as it got done.

There is an old saying when it comes to teams: “Either we are pulling together or we’re pulling apart.” Let’s make sure we are always pulling in the right direction.

Enjoy the day and let me challenge you to make an effort to do something that contributes to the success of your team whether in your family, or at work, or in school or in church.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Maybe the Best Christmas is the Simple Christmas.

Dear Friends,

It's 7:45, and I just got up. It is a little different from most Christmas mornings when I would be up before anyone else, would go downstairs to check out the presents scattered around the tree, maybe make some coffee, and wait until everyone else got up to celebrate the day.

But a lot of things are different this year. No large Christmas Eve service in the sanctuary, but a much smaller gathering in our gym, Simplicity was the word. The children performed, all dressed up in their costumes, as they portrayed the events of that first Christmas. A second service of carols and scripture was held with a brief message and invitation, and of course the lighting of our candles. Nothing was polished or well scripted as it might have been at more elaborate Christmas services in the past. It was simple church.

We enjoyed dinner with a dear friend in our church at one of our favorite Italian restaurants, and while it took over an hour to have our food served, we didn't mind, as who counts time when you are with a friend. Friendship is such a simple gift.

Jean and I both decided that we would avoid exchanging gifts this year, and for me that meant Christmas would be simpler- no hurried  last-minute trips to Outback for a gift card or to Walgreen’s for some Jean Nate. We both agreed that we already have everything we could possibly need, so if we are going to spend any money, we wanted to spend it on our kids and on others who need things more than we do. 

Yes, Christmas is a lot different this year with the Pandemic raging. But despite the changes and the differences, I find myself thankful for the simplicity of this year's Christmas.

Time Out!  My granddaughter Reese just arrived at my desk to beckon us downstairs to watch our family open their presents. To be continued………. 

I'm back, and I'm bringing with me my favorite gift of all, a present from my daughter, Rachel, who runs the 'Geek Squad' in our home. The last two weeks she has been trying to solve a mysterious and perplexing computer issue of mine- a malfunctioning mouse.

Her gift to me was a simple mouse pad, simple but unique,  given the pictures of her family and an annual calendar, both  printed on the mouse pad. Such a simple and modest gift, but one of the best gifts I have ever received as it has solved the complex and frustrating problem of an erratically moving mouse on my computer screen. Sometimes the simplest gifts are the best gifts of all.

And when I think about simple gifts and a simple Christmas, I am reminded of the simple and modest circumstances surrounding that first Christmas- a baby birthed in a cattle stall outside a cheap motel with the only guests a few unpretentious shepherds. An in reflecting on that simple birth that turned out to be so momentous that it changed the dating of our calendars, I have come to believe that maybe the simple Christmas is the best Christmas after all.

Wishing you all a safe and simple Christmas. And may the most magnificent gift you receive be the simplest and yet most costly gift of all- the loving gift from the hands of our Father who gave His only Son to die for our sins upon a cross, and in so doing would change our lives today and for all eternity.

Merry Christmas

Tom

Leadership Thought: Don’t Forget the Empty Chair on Christmas.

Dear Friends,

Christmas time is generally a joyous occasion for families, especially if you are lucky enough to have children and grandchildren as we are.

But Christmas can also be a sad and lonely time for those sitting around a dinner table with an empty chair.

Covid and other illnesses have recently taken the lives of several of my friends, both in this church and in other churches I have served.

Just three days ago I lost a good friend, and today there is news that another friend lies helpless in a hospital as his family watches his organs slowly shutting down.

This year my heart is heavy for the families with the empty, or soon to be empty chair. Christmas for them will never be the same, and no matter how many gifts they receive, or friends they entertain, nothing will fill the empty void in their aching hearts.

I am sorry that this may be a downer for those who read these words today, and I don’t wish to rob you of the Christmas joy that so many of you long to experience. However, let me encourage you  while your laughing and celebrating as you should, don’t forget to remember those in the hospital, nursing homes, or living in the solitary silence of a home once filled with Christmas joy.

Yes, Christmas can be a glad time, but it also can be a sad time, and I remind you of this because you may know of people who may be celebrating Christmas alone and who would love a call, visit, where possible, or better yet, a seat at your table.

I love you all, and I am grateful for your encouragement as I continue to communicate with you throughout the week. My hope and prayer is that something of what I have shared might make a difference in your life, and in the lives of others.

Have a blessed Christmas and don’t forget to shine your light for others, for after all, “You are the light of the world.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: The Christmas Hope Wrapped Up in Death.

Dear Friends,

It arrived just yesterday, flashing across my computer screen, an e-mail which came from a good friend in a church I served in the 80’s- “Yesterday John Beham passed away.” 

While I hadn’t seen or talked with John for many years, I considered him a dear friend. We served together in the church I pastored, we fished together at our summer cottage, we laughed together on retreats, but without much warning, the Lord called him home.

I called his wife, and as I was leaving a message I broke down and began weeping uncontrollably, and even this moment as I write this, I feel the tears welling up within. Another friend gone home. The older I get, the more of these messages I receive and each one is just as painful as the last.

As I sat at my desk this morning, I opened up a book a friend had given me as a gift. As I thumbed through the pages of  A Good Old Age by Derek Prime, hoping to find something that would speak to my sadness, I turned to a chapter on hope, and I read these words. “Hope means that when we attend the funeral of someone we love, we can both smile and shed a tear at one and the same time. The Bible calls it holding ‘on to our courage and the hope of which we boast” (Hebrews 3:6, p. 63).

Like Jesus who stood beside the grave of Lazarus, we shed a tear over the death of someone we knew and loved. Yes, Jesus grieved -the Bible says he even wept  (John 11:35),  as He stood beside the grave. But in a moment His weeping would turn to joy as He watched his good friend step out and shed his grave clothes.

Funerals can be a time when both sadness and gladness are wrapped together in one emotion. We are sad that our friend is leaving us, but we are glad for we know where he is going. 

Death for the believer is no longer termination, but transformation. It changes our position, but never our condition, for once we are in Christ, death has no claim upon us for we are protected and safe within His arms. That’s why it has been said that only Christians can smile at funerals.

And when someone asks me why this is true, I can say, and  even sing the assurance of that blessed hope,

                                  "For my hope is built on nothing less

                                   Than Jesus blood and righteousness;

                                   I dare not trust the sweetest frame,

                                   But wholly lean on Jesus’ name.

                                  On Christ the solid rock I stand;

                                  All other ground is sinking sand.” Edward Mote

And if you are looking for a further reason to smile at death, you might want to turn to 1 Thess. 4:13-14 where you will read, “Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.  For we believe that Jesus died and rose ago, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.”

And because of this I can say at my friend’s funeral, “So long, John, but thanks be to God, I will see you later.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Do You Really Think That It’s the Light That Is ‘Attractin Em?’

Dear Friends,

In the backwoods of 'Gooberland,'’ a Goober’s wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery.

Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said: “Here, you hold this high so I can see what I’m doing.”

Soon a baby boy was brought into the world.

“Whoa there,” said the doctor. “Don’t be in a rush to put the lantern down….I think there’s yet another one to come.”

Sure enough, within minutes, he had delivered a baby girl.

“No, no, don’t be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern. It seems there’s yet another one in there!” cried the doctor.

The Goober scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor, “Do you think it’s the light that’s ’attractin em?’

Light does attract a lot attention. On that first Christmas there was a lot of light. The wise men saw a bright light in the sky, the star, and followed it to where the Savior was born.  The angels performed a dazzling light show in the Bethlehem skies, and it was that light that attracted the attention of shepherds and led them to a cow stall and a feeding troth to see the object of that light.

Jesus taught us that we are to be lights. He said, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do men light a lamp, and put it under a bushel, but on the lampstand; and it gives light to all who are in the house (Matt. 5:14-16).

This dark world, filled with discouragement, depression, disease and death needs a lot of light, and Jesus says you are just the ones I need to shine your lights and brighten up the darkness.

If you are a Christian family living in a  non-Christian neighborhood you are the light in that neighborhood. If you are a nurse on the floor of an ICU unit, or an athlete on a team, or a student in your school,  or an employee in a company, or a policeman in a car  or a firemen in your station, you are a light, so let your hold your light high and let it shine. No, not so people will see and praise you, but so that they will praise the One who is the source of your light.  Brothers and sisters,  don’t worry about how bright and sparkling you are, just shine the best you can and Jesus will be seen and glorified.

In the words of that song every one of us have sung, “This little light of mine, I’m going let it shine.”

And if you do, like that goober, you will discover that maybe it is the light that is ‘attractin em.'

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: What’s So Amazing about Grace?

Dear Friend,

On Sunday I walked out of church with an armful of Christmas gifts. They were personally hand delivered by some of our own members. If you asked me why I deserved to  them, I would be hard pressed to tell you, for did I really merit that unrivaled gift of Joan Steidl’s shortbread cookies? No, but I am glad they arrived along with other gifts of love.

Sometimes gifts are hard to receive because we know we don’t deserve them. And with their arrival, there surfaces that question within- "what can I do to pay these gifts back?" But Tom, they are simply expressions of love, and there is no need to feel like have to pay them back.

This is the same feeling a lot of us experience when we hear the good news of the gospel, that salvation is a free gift that is neither earned nor deserved. When we hear the preacher proclaim ‘"that it is by grace that you have been saved through faith, and it is a gift of God, and not of works lest anyone should boast, (Eph. 4:8-9)  we ask “What’s the catch? What do I need to do to deserve it?"

I find this to be one of the hardest truths for people to accept. How can it be that heaven is a free gif, and that is not something you can earn or deserve. Grace is a hard concept to understand, and harder to accept.

One day Jesus was asked “what must we do to do the works God requires?” John 6:28. And Jesus replied, “This is the work of God, that you believe on Him whom he hath sent.” John 6:29.

If you want to experience abundant and eternal life, if you want to know love like you have never known it before, if you want to experience forgiveness that erases every embarrassing sin from your past, all you have to do is to "believe on Him whom he hath sent."

That sounds just too good to be true. Yes, and it sounded too good to be true for that first century Jew who was living under the bondage of the law. They wanted to add an “and” to their faith. It is Christ and keeping the law, "and" being holy, "and" never missing church, "and" reading my bible "and"…There is no end to the ”ands” they wanted to add when it came to seeking their salvation.

For the last few weeks, I have been studying the book of Galatians, and if anyone has a question about whether there is an “and” that must be added to our faith, reading this book will dispel it.

Paul writes, “We who are Jews by birth and not Gentile sinners know that a man is not justified by observing the law, but by faith in Jesus Christ. So, we to, have put our faith in Christ Jesus that we may be justified by faith in Christ and not by observing the law, because by observing the law no one will be justified” (Gal 2:15-16). 

No one will be made right and acceptable to God by anything other than faith in Jesus.

But is it really that simple? Is all I have to do is to simply believe that Jesus died for my sins and, as Corrie Ten Boom was fond of saying,  “He has buried my sins in the deepest part of the ocean and put up a sign that says no fishing.” The answer is yes. It is as simple as ABC. “Accept” that Jesus died for your sins, “Believe” that God raised Him from the dead, and “Confess” Jesus Christ is Lord.

But there is one catch, for as E. Stanley Jones writes “Grace binds you with far stronger cords than the cords of duty or obligation can bind you. Grace is free, but when you take it, you are bound forever to the Giver and bound to catch the spirit of the Giver. Like produces like. Grace makes you gracious, The Giver makes you give.” 

But is it worth it? Just ask anyone who has received it, and they will shout a resounding, Amen!

Yours in faith,

Tom

Leadership Thought: "Bring My Flowers Now" and Don't Be a Tombstone Encourager (Listen to the Song at the End).

Dear Friends,

As most of you know I love country music, the classic kind from the 50’s through the mid 90’s. One of the great singers of that era was Tanya Tucker, (Delta Dawn and A Sparrow in a Hurricane), and at 61 she is still singing, and yesterday I heard one of her best recordings ever, "Bring Me Flowers Now." 

The lyrics made me think of a message I heard a number of years reminding me to never to be a “Tombstone Encourager,” the kind of person who never gets to say what he/she would like to say to a friend.

In my first church there was a song we used to sing. I still remember the lyrics: “Tell them now before there  just a memory. Tell them now before it’s too late. Hold them, love them, laugh and cry with them. Tell then now before they’re just a memory.”

Those lyrics came to mind once  again as I listened to Tanya Tucker’s song.  And as I thought about their meaning, I remembered several instances in my life when I waited too long to tell a friend how much I loved and missed them. Sadly, it often takes a tombstone to remind us of  unspoken words, or unseen actions we wished we had said or done.                         

                                        " Bring my flowers now, while I’m livin’

                                         I won’t need your love when I’m gone

                                         Don’t spend time, tears, or money

                                         On my old breathless body

                                         If your heart is in them flowers, bring ‘em on.

As I sat at my desk yesterday beholding the carpet of white that covered our front lawn, I took a few moments to quietly reflect on the countless  friends Jean and I  have stored away in  our “Friendship Treasury Bank. I thought of Syracuse, NY, Philadelphia, Pa. Greenville, Pa, Red Bank, N.J, Fort Lauderdale, Fl. Old Bridge, N.J and now Middletown, N.Y, stops along the path of ministry, where friendships were forged that have lasted a lifetime.

Just two nights ago, I picked up the phone and was able to talk with one of those “forever friends” I made in Greenville, Pa, the third church I pastored. She and her husband and three children were all Covid positive. Her husband was in a hospital two hours away and fighting for his life and one of her son’s had just lost his father in law to Covid. It had been over 30 years since I last talked with the family, but it seemed like it was only yesterday. 

That’s so true of friendship. Time never erases their memory.

In his travels the Apostle Paul made many treasured friends who blessed and touched his life. I took a few minutes to reacquaint myself with them as I read Romans 16: 3-5; 2 Corinthians 2:12-13; Philippians 2:25; Colossians 4:7; and  2 Timothy 1:2-4.

And having listened to the words of Tanya and read the words of Paul, I realized I needed to get busy and call some of those  friends and let them know how much they’ve meant to me. And maybe you have a few of them as well, friends who would be encouraged to hear your voice and know you’re thinking of them.

That, my friend, is your weekend assignment, so please pick up the phone and get started.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Videos of bring my flowers now tanya tucker

Leadership Thought: Yesterday I Cheated on What I Liked, Loved and Learned.

Dear Friends,

In our Men’s Spiritual leadership Class, we have a section where we discuss three questions about the chapter we were assigned: “what did you like,” “what did you learn,” and “what did you love?”

We are studying the classic leadership book, Spiritual Leadership by Oswald Sanders, and the chapter study for yesterday’s class was “The Leader and Time.” As I studied the chapter,  I found myself in a bind. There was no way I could limit myself to one answer for each of the questions. There were just too many possibilities to choose from. So, what do you do when this happens? You throw the assignment out the window, and you do what I did a lot of in high school when I didn’t know how to answer the questions. You ignore your instructions, and you write as much as you can about information that has nothing to do with the questions in hopes that the teacher will at least  be impressed with the extraneous information that you did know.

In any event, rather than completing the assignment as directed, I changed the rules, and since I am one of the teachers of the class, I thought I might get away with it. However, I never found out whether my classmates would approve of my tactical change, as yesterday’s snow fall canceled our evening class until next week.

So here are some of my answers to what I “liked,” “learned.” and “loved” all lumped together in one big pile. I hope you will find some of the following insights from our leadership “friend” to be helpful as you endeavor to faithfully manage your time as the Lord's faithful steward.

“The way we employ our surplus hours, after provision has been made for work, meals, and sleep, will determine if we develop into mediocre or powerful people. Leisure is a glorious opportunity and a subtle danger. A discretionary hour can get wisely invested or foolishly wasted. Each moment of the day is a gift from God that deserves care, for by any measure, our time is short, and the work is great” (p. 111).

“William James said ‘the best use of one's life is to spend it for something that will outlast it.’ Life's value is not its duration, but its donation-not how long we live but how fully and how well” (p. 112).

“We are not responsible for our endowments or natural, abilities, but we are responsible for the strategic use of our time....Time lost can never be retrieved. Time cannot be hoarded, only spent well...(p. 113).

“The leader must carefully select priorities. He or she must thoughtfully weigh the value of different opportunities and responsibilities. The leader cannot spend time on secondary matters while essential obligations scream for attention. A day needs careful planning” (p. 113).

“On conscious of time, Jesus spent his time doing things that mattered. No time was wasted on things not vital. The strength of moral character is conserved by refusing the unimportant... How interesting that the gospel accounts contain no hint of any interruption ever disturbing the serenity of the Son of God.  Few things in life are more likely to produce tension in a busy life than unexpected interruptions” (p.115).

“The pressure a spiritual leader feels comes from assuming tasks that God has not assigned; for such tasks the leader cannot expect God to supply the extra strength required” (p.116).

“Procrastination, the thief of time, is one of the devils most potent weapons for defrauding us of eternal heritage. The habit of ‘putting off’ is fatal to spiritual leadership. Its power resides in our natural reluctance to come to grips with important decisions. Most decisions are more difficult a day later, and you also lose an advantage by such delay.  ‘Do it now’ is a motto that has led many people to worldly success, and it is equally relevant in spiritual matters” (p. 118).

I hope that some of these thoughts will whet your appetite to purchase a copy of this leadership classic. If not, at least maybe you can find a few quotes to tape to your bathroom mirror.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Don't Be an "Ice Tapper" When You Can Be a Thundering Herd.

Dear Friends,

I have many friends that I have accumulated inside my four by five-foot wooden file cabinet. Constructed over 40 years ago by a member of my church in Greenville, Pa.,  this cabinet is my sermon treasure chest, for inside are hidden thousands of 3 by 5 cards containing stories, quotes, and teachings by some of the most significant teachers in the world. There is a lot of wisdom accumulated and neatly lodged within those drawers. These “filing friends” of mine provide me access to large amounts of information that I might otherwise have forgotten.

Some use computers to store knowledge and relevant information, and I am learning to do this as well, but for me, still nothing beats the hands-on experience of pulling out a story or two that is neatly hidden within the recesses of  those hand-crafted wooden drawers.

As I write this morning, I am indebted to the late Chuck Smith for one of those stories tucked away within those drawers.

He tells how many years ago he heard of a fellow who ran out of fuel in the middle of a blizzard and needed to ask a neighbor for some oil. “The river that separated his house from his neighbor’s was frozen over, so he got down on his hands and knees and reached out as far as he could on the ice, rapping with his knuckles to determine the ice’s thickness. In this way he inched his way across the river, reaching out and tapping. Soon his knuckles were bloody. Just about the time he reached the far bank of the river, he heard a rumbling behind him-seeing a team of horses thundering across the river.” Why Grace Changes Everything, Chuck Smith p. 60

Now I can’t vouch for the truthfulness of the story, but it does illustrate an important lesson for all of us to learn.

Some of us are like that fellow and are prone to say, “I believe in the promises of God,” yet like that “ice tapper” we keep knocking to see if those promises can hold us up. I know the bible says God can meet  my needs, but I am not quite sure if He can meet each and every one of my needs.  I hope I can depend on His Promises and that they are secure and dependable and that they “will hold up,” but my faith is tentative and my belief needs some reassurance.

Unlike others who boldly launch out trusting in God’s faithfulness in keeping all of His promises, you may be an “ice tapper” carefully inching your way across the ice, while hoping the ice is secure enough to keep you from falling through. But as one of His children, you can boldly thunder cross that ice covered river like that herd of horses, knowing that the promises of God are sure and certain.

Just as God spoke to Joshua, God speaks to us "ice tappers” today and asks,  “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous; Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go”( Joshua 1:9).

Isn't it good to know that all of “the promises of God in Him are Yes and Amen” to us ( (2 Corinthians 1:30)?

His promises are true and trustworthy, and His strength is sufficient to keep you from falling, so don’t be an “ice tapper when you can be like that thundering herd.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

 

 

Leadership Thought: The Day I Met the Perfect Heathen.

Dear Friends,

Have you ever met a real heathen? I am talking about the kind of person who takes seriously the desire to live completely committed to fulfilling the desires of the flesh. You name the sin, and he has done it or thought about it. Want a descriptive list of this person, then turn to Galatians 5:19-21 and read Paul’s description of the ‘perfect’ heathen. Imagine sitting next to that person in church.

Last week I talked with a model heathen as I listened to him share his story. When he had finished, I remarked, “You truly were the perfect heathen.” We laughed as he had just finished his testimony of how God supernaturally took hold of his life and changed him from the inside out.

My friend had told a coworker how unhappy he was with his life. The friend invited him to sit down, and he took out his bible and thumbing his way through the pages, he stopped at Galatians chapter 5. He told my friend to read the chapter. As he began reading, he suddenly stopped and cried out, “That’s me, that’s me.”

And my friend went on to relate how that encounter changed his life. Immediately the Spirit of God revealed to him his sinful nature. He realized, it was “Because of these things, (his sinful nature) that the wrath of God is coming” (Colossians 3:6), and right there and then he opened his heart and gave his life to Jesus.

I’ll never forget the story, and today you may find him sitting next to you at our church.

The list in Galatians is lengthy (I counted some 15 acts of the flesh) but not exhaustive. It is just a sample of what the fleshly life is like.  And Paul makes clear the consequences of such a lifestyle. He says I want you to know that “those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God” (Gal 5:19-21).

Now Paul was not talking about the person who struggles with some of the sins on the list. He was talking about the person who habitually chooses to practice this kind of behavior, arrogantly and willfully and with no desire to change.

I am so glad that there are people like this in our church, who like my friend have discovered the power of God to change lives. Paul writes, “If any man is in Christ, the old has passed away; the new has come” (2 Cor 5:17). 

Wise is the person who takes Paul’s words seriously, and says I don’t want to miss out on heaven, so forgive me for my sinful nature, change my heart and fill me with your Spirit so that I may know you and the promise of eternal life.

It can happen. I know because 58 years ago it happened to me, and it can happen to you, even if you are not the ‘perfect’ heathen.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

 

Leadership Thought: Chuck Smith, a New Computer and a Lesson on Grace.

Dear Friends,

I got started late start this morning as my computer crashed on Friday, and when I found it would be as  expensive to fix it as to buy a new one,  I bit the bullet and purchased a new one. Thank goodness for my daughter as she was able to get it set up and functioning earlier this morning. Jean and I will never be recruited by the Geek Squad when it comes to setting up computers.

I for one struggle with anything that has wires and has pass codes. As I shared a few weeks ago in a message, all the Verizon employees start running when they see me walk through the door. "It's him again." "I know him." "He's been here before and he is fragile."
"You take him."

I confess I am normally pretty even keeled, that is until I walk through the Verizon door with a new phone problem. It is only a few minutes before my blood pressure starts to rise, and I break into a cold sweat as I hear those dreaded words, "What is your verification code number?" 

I confess I have no idea what a verification number is, let along what my number is. And the next question  sends me over the edge when they asked me what's my old password? Now together Jean and I have generated enough passwords to fill up a telephone book. At that point I am ready to order a flip phone and get out of there as quickly and as graciously as possible before I do something that would damage my reputation.

But thanks to my daughter, I not only have a phone that is programmed and a computer that moments ago was fixed and is now up and running  (I did help her somewhat as I plugged in one of the cords to the socket-not sure which one, however), 

I have been reading Why Grace Changes Everything, by Chuck Smith, the founder of Calvary Chapel movement. There have been few people who were more qualified to write on the subject of grace than Pastor Church who was one of the most grace filled men I have ever met. HIs ministry impacted thousands of lives, and some of the most influential pastors in the country grew up in his church or were impacted and influenced by those who sat at his feet. He authored over 50 books and today his Bible studies can he heard on Christian radio stations all over the world. Chuck was a man of great grace.

I close with a perfect example of this grace and humility, which were two of Chuck's most notable possessions. 

Chuck writes "Heaven is going to be full of surprises. As we look around the first surprise will be all the people who we thought would never make it. The next surprise will be those sitting in the front row in the places of honor. We will say, 'Who are these people? I never saw them before.' 'Some of them went to Calvary Chapel,' someone will say.' 'But where is Pastor Chuck?' And from somewhere way out in the back of the crowd, in the peanut gallery, I will yell, 'Here I am! Thank God, though His grace I made it.'" Why Grace Changes Everything, Chuck Smith, p 41.

It is all about GRACE, ("God's Riches at Christ's Expense"). We too will make it to heaven, but not because we did anything to earn or deserve it, but only because, like Chuck, we learned that heaven is a place reserved for sinners just  like you and me, and somehow because of His grace, He welcomed us in to the back row.

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: You May Be Surprised by What You Find in Your 'Little Black Cloud'

Dear Friends,

One of the bi products of being a pastor is that you develop a lot of friends you can count on to help you write your sermons. They either do it unknowingly and you use them as illustrations or examples, or they do it knowingly, as happened a couple of weeks ago, when I asked a friend of mine if she had any good illustrations on depression.

My friend, Tina Reeder, with whom I served while I was on staff at Calvary Chapel, Fort Lauderdale, was quick to share a personal illustration. Tina is wise beyond her years.  She never secured a  D. D. (Doctor of Divinity) degree  from some prestigious seminary. No, her degree came from the desert. She possessed, a “Desert Doctorate, just like Moses and John the Baptist and Jesus, who like her, had spent some time learning lessons in the  desert.

Sometime ‘desert degrees’ can be far more valuable learning experiences than the ones you get in the classroom setting

The Apostle John got his  “Desert Doctorate”  in isolation on a far-off barren island called Patmos. In this lonely desert experience, God  spoke, and John  listened and the words he heard and the visions he saw are now recorded in the  22 chapters of the Book of Revelation.

Like John and my friend Tina, your days may be dry, desolate and difficult, but maybe God has you right where you need to be.

Listen to what my friend Tina learned during her desert days after losing the husband she had just married in a tragic motorcycle accident. She went through a long period of grieving, only to come through it stronger that she was before. This is the story she shared with me when she learned I would be speaking on depression.

I used to call it my “little black cloud days”.  It was those days when I just couldn’t shake it, the feeling of sadness, loneliness, sometimes despair.  When it was an effort to keeping moving forward and I longed to just get home and crawl back into bed, pull the covers over my head and sleep until it went away.  This would happen often after James died but then seemed to dissipate gradually.  Sometimes my “little black cloud” would linger all day, other times it would be just for a time, disappear and reappear later that day.  Not sure what caused it to come, linger, dissipate or reappear but after months and years of this I finally inquired of the Lord.  “Lord, is this just what I will deal with?  The grief?  For how long?  Will it ever totally go away?”  And as the Lord often does, He spoke gently to my heart, “Daughter, my precious one, make friends with the “little black cloud” because in it you will find me”.  Therefore, I did.  I welcomed that cloud and sensed His presence.  Did it take away the feelings of loneliness, or sadness?  No.  But it gave me hope, purpose and comfort in those feelings".

Your struggle may not be with depression, but whatever is may be, I hope  you will find comfort and encouragement in this lesson from my ‘desert friend.’

Sometimes in gazing at your 'little black cloud' you may find the source of your healing. It may not be exactly what you were looking for, but it’s just what you need, and it comes as a gracious gift from a God who loves you far more than you could ever know.

In closing may I remind you that “There is no problem that is so big for God's power or too small for Gods concern.”

And if your doubt this, turn to Isaiah 41:10 and you will read, “Fear not for I am with you, be not dismayed for I am your God, I will help you and strengthen you and uphold you with my  righteous right  hand.”

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

 

Leadership Thought: Yesterday’s Funeral Reminder: “What on Earth Am I Here For?”

Dear Friends,

Yesterday I did a funeral for a friend of mine whose grandfather has died at 88. He had lived a long and meaningful  life. He had left his mark on his family and his community. Sadly, however, instead of the 100’s that would have gathered for his funeral, because of Covid 19, there were only a handful of his children and grandchildren present.

As I do at most every funeral I conduct, I provide a time for family and friends to share thoughts and remembrances regarding the who died. Yesterday’s sharing was particularly special to me as I listened to a number of the grandchildren share the impact their grandfather had on their lives. “He always made a feel special.” “He was so proud of everything we did.” “He was so thoughtful and caring.” “He was the glue that held our family together,” were only a few of the phrases I recall being shared.

It has been said that “the only thing that walks back from the grave with the mourners and refuses to be buried is the character of the man.” In the case of “Andy” Anderson there was a lot of Andy  that  walked back with the mourners. He had left  behind a wonderful legacy for all those who would follow in his footsteps.

All of this got me thinking about what will people  say and ‘carry back’ with them  when they walk home from my funeral? And what will they say and what will they ‘carry back’ from your service? Have we left a mark, made a difference, created a legacy, and left some mighty large character footprints to follow?

Andy knew Jesus, so he wasn’t “just leaving home; he was going home." His home on earth, although lengthy by our standards, 88 years,  was short compared to the time he would spend in eternity.

Andy  was just a stranger, a pilgrim a visitor, a temporary resident on earth, but his permanent home was waiting for him in heaven.

Rick Warren writes “We should all carry green cards to remind us that our citizenship is in heaven.” What on Earth Am I Here For, Rick Warren, p 43.

For Andy death was just “moving day, and he knew where he was going. Home for him was spelled heaven

I hope all of us would live like Andy lived and die like Andy died, safe and secure in his new home.

The Bible says, "You’re cheating on God. If all you want is your own way, flirting with the world every chance you get, you end up enemies of God and his way.” ( James 4:4 Msg.)

For those of you who know Jesus, I remind you that this earth is not our home, but only our temporary residence. Andy knew Jesus, and the wonderful promise of life eternal awaiting him and so can you.

John tells us, "And this is the testimony: God has given us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life. I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know that you have eternal life.1 John 5:11-13).

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom

Leadership Thought: Don't Forget to Take the Tartar Sauce with You!

Dear Friends,

I love being around positive people, people like the ones who go fishing for Moby Dick and take the tartar sauce with them.

I don’t know if they still produce the “Master Teacher,” booklets,  but I still have one of their pamphlets from my teaching days.  It was titled  "Eight Ways to Create a Positive Climate." Although meant for teachers, it could be just as well directed to those in other walks of life.

Let me quote some wise words that caught my attention. “The teacher action vital to high productivity is maintaining a consistently positive attitude and using ‘can,’ and ‘do’ words or phrases. Conversely it is wise to use three words sparingly: ‘can’t,’ ‘don't’  and ‘no.’ These three words actually undermine a productive climate and stop creativity and individual initiative cold.”

When my basketball players would tell me why they couldn't do something, I would often tell them the story of the bumblebee whose tiny wingspan and heavy body structure makes it aerodynamically impossible to fly. However, the bumblebee ignores this scientific truth and chooses to fly anyway.

Whenever I would hear one of my players use the “I can’t” phrase, I would always correct him, admonishing him saying, “Change your language or change your team.” If we were to be a team of winners and not whiners, I needed to cultivate a “can do” and not a “can’t do” attitude on my team.

One of my favorite stories involves  identical twins. One was a hope filled optimist. For him everything was always coming up roses. The other was an eternal pessimist. The worried parents brought the boys to the local psychologist.

He suggested to the parents a plan to balance the twins’ personalities. On their next birthday, put them in separate rooms to open their gifts. Give the pessimist the best toys you can afford, and give the optimist a box of manure. The parents carefully followed these instructions and then observed the results.

When they peeked in on the pessimist, they heard him audibly complaining,  “I don’t like the color of this computer…I’ll bet this calculator is going to break…I don’t like this game…I know someone who’s got a bigger toy car than this.

Tip toeing across the corridor, the parents peeked in and saw their little optimist gleefully throwing the manure up in the air. He was giggling. “You can’t fool me. I know there has got to be a pony in here somewhere.”

Wherever I am, I hope I will be hanging with hopeful and optimistic people like this little manure slinger. I want to associate with the Calebs and the Joshuas of this world. When the other spies were finding reasons why they couldn’t  enter the Promise Land, Caleb and Joshua were ready to claim what God had promised. Surrounded by the naysayers who were convinced that they were like grasshoppers in the face of their enemy, they were taking up arms and ready to claim what God had promised them.  “We should by all means go up and take possession of (the land), for we shall surely overcome” (Numbers 13:30).

I love the courageous words found in the opening lines of Psalm 27.

“The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the defense of my life, whom shall I dread?

When evildoers came upon me to devour my flesh,

Though a host encamp against me, my heart will not fear;

Though war arise against me, in spite of this I shall be confident” ( vv. 1-3).

Brothers and sisters, it’s time to march against the enemy, look him in straight in the eye, and like Caleb and Joshua proclaim “I gottcha.” And while the crowd may be shouting, “you are wrong,”  or “you are foolish,” “you will never win,” you just keep on smiling as you remind them that you are a “Can Do” kind of person with a bottle of tartar sauce in your back pocket.

Action Point. What will you start or accomplish today that the world might say is impossible?

Yours in faith and friendship,

Tom